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Adding Value

Adding Value: Navigating Through Life’s Stress by Henry Ukazu

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Dear Destiny Friends,

Each of us experiences stress in one form or another. Stress comes in different stages. You can experience financial stress, academic stress, relationship/marriage stress, personal/emotional stress. You may be wondering what the most stressful part of life is. Well, depending on situational variables; mental, financial or relationship stress come tops. This is because when you have bills to take care of or provide for your family and the resources are not available, it can have a damaging effect on your mental and psychological mindset, which if not if not properly handled, can drain you. However, some schools of thought believe that marriage stress has the most damaging effect on a human being, especially when married to the wrong person.

As human beings, stress is inevitable in our life. Stress can be compared as a woman, who a minute few has described as a ‘necessary evil’ that can’t be avoided. The question we must continually deal with on a daily basis is how can we deal with stress in life?

It is often said that ‘whatsoever cannot kill you will make you stronger’, so stress does make one strong, who is smart enough to navigate through it. Some stress syndrome result from too many obligations which were not properly managed, and they end up having adverse effects on the body. It should be noted that nobody is immune to stress. When people say it’s not greener out there, they really know what they mean. Sometimes, we are quick to assume other people are living their best life while you are living your worst life. But, there may be more that meet the eye.

However, we should be concerned with how to overcome stress. In my calculated opinion, the best way to avoid stress is to avoid worrying over circumstances or situations that cannot be changed. As human beings, we always have the fear of the unknown which can come in several forms. When you come to the sublime realization that certain things and situations are beyond your control, you’ll realize that you are just worrying yourself unnecessarily.

Many people manage stress in different ways, while some people prefer seeing a therapist, others might prefer different relaxation steps like taking a walk in the garden, reading, sleeping, dancing, swimming, exercising, etc. You just need to know what works for you. Personally, whenever I am stressed, I listen to music or sleep to keep my sanity together.

Another way to overcome the adversity of stress of life is by celebrating little wins and gratitude. Most times, we are quick to condemn ourselves for the mistakes we have made. Sometimes, we are unnecessarily hard on ourselves, while sometimes we are quick to point fingers at circumstances, human beings and institutions as being the cause of our stress. The moment we fail to take ownership of our challenges and accept the fact that life happens to everyone, we’ll continue to experience stress.

The interesting thing about life challenges is that each one of us experience life and stress differently. For instance, the attitude and threshold of pain Mr. A or Ms. A will experience or feel from pain, divorce, or disappointments, will be different from that of Mr. B. or Miss B. This is because we all experience and react to stress, pain, and disappointments differently.

In conclusion, regardless of whatever your situation might be, just be grateful to your creator that you are still alive, and be happy because tomorrow is looking good. You can do this by looking at the street and see what different people are going through. Some don’t have legs, hands, eyes, food, etc. Some don’t even have family, children, spouse, job, some are even wishing they are in your shoes or condition. You can also turn on the television and see what others are experiencing globally. You might be surprised to know some are experiencing wars and earthquakes. The list is literally endless. So, this is me trying to encourage you to know that everyone is going through a different kind of secret frustration. However, if you feel you need someone to talk to, feel free to reach out to me via the contact below.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He’s a Human Capacity & mindset coach. He’s also a public speaker, youth advocate and creative writer. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the author of the acclaimed book Design Your Destiny – Actualizing Your Birthright To Success and President of gloemi.com. He can be reached via info@gloemi.com

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Adding Value

Adding Value: The Currencies of Existence by Henry Ukazu

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Dear Destiny Friends,

Did you know that life is full of different currencies? Yes, just like different countries have their unique currencies, different human beings, governments, schools, organizations and institutions have unique currencies that not only work for them, but also set them apart from others. Anyone with the intent to work with any of them therefore, must be prepared to present their currency, and speak in the language they understand.

Currencies in this context are not limited to medium of exchange as in money, but includes every gesture and body language that propel acknowledgement, connectivity and acceptance when in deals with another party.

Let’s take a case study of the United States of America; their trading currency is dollars,  and some of the characteristics that made them unique are:

Core Values and Freedoms: The U.S. is built on principles of individual rights, religious freedom, and limited government, enshrined in the Constitution.

The “American Dream“: Is a pervasive culture of opportunity that allows for upward mobility and the ability to pursue personal success regardless of background.

Innovation and Entrepreneurship: A leading global hub for technology, invention, and business, from Silicon Valley to space exploration.

Diversity and Inclusion: A “melting pot” that blends cultures, ideas, and people from around the world into a unique national identity.

All these are currencies that make the United States the greatest country on earth. If any progressive mind can tap into any of these principles, they stand a greater chance of succeeding in America if they work hard and play by the rules.

The same principle is applicable in any country, government school, organization and institution. Every school, institution, organization and human being have core values and principles which can be likened to currencies. It is these core values that make them unique.

When the word currency is mentioned, it’s easy for one to think of money, but currency does not relate only to money. There are many qualities that one may have that’s more than money. For instance, good health, values, character, and principles are some qualities money can’t buy. It’s only small minds who think highly of money.

As a matter of fact, there are individuals who can sell their soul for money. These sets of people don’t really have conscience because they are merely concerned about themselves. They might have the mindset of use what you must get what you don’t have. When you contrast such a mindset with people with values, you will discover that the difference is clear, because these great minds are big on legacy. They stand for the right ideology even if it means for them to stand alone. This is the kind of currency I am talking about.

Some of the social currencies that uninformed minds are not aware of are knowledge, good health, God, relationship, access, internet, and skill. These are powerful currencies resourceful people use to thrive globally. Some might have money, but that same money can’t get access to certain groups of people, while some people might not have money, but they have access to certain people and if they successfully use their “currency” they can use it as an exchange of value to get money from rich people.

The same principle is applicable in relationships. As a matter of fact, I strongly feel apart from God, the strongest currency one can have is relationship. One might have education with good grades, money, and social currency, but lack how to establish and nurture a good relationship with people.

In social networking, the maxim is who do you know? But in advanced networking, the rule has changed to who knows you because you might know President Trump or Elon Musk, but do they know you? Do you know that who you know might open the door for you, but who knows you will give you a seat at the table. That’s the hallmark of a relationship.  According to Robin Sharma “The business of business is relationships; but the business of life the business of life is human connection”.

The internet is also a social currency. The internet is called the fifth estate for a reason. In this 21st century, the internet has made us understand that the world is a global village. You can literally connect with anyone via social media. It’s sad to see people on social media but find it difficult to use it to advance their cause and careers in addition to connecting with the right people.

In all honesty, I am a big fan of social media because it has enabled me to connect with great people all over the world. I use my social media pages as a platform to share what I do and I have been privileged to connect with some great people. Like, I always say, why be local when you can be global?

Let’s analyze the four main currencies: Time, Energy, Attention and Money. (TEAM)

Time: Your most finite resource; it cannot be earned back, so how you spend your hours defines your life

EnergyThe driving force for action, encompassing physical, mental, and emotional fuel for creativity and resilience

Attention: Where you focus your mind, determines what grows and flourishes in your life amidst distractions.

MoneyA tangible means of exchange for goods, services, and opportunities, but its value depends on how it serves your goals.

In conclusion, just like everyone is unique and blessed with several gifts/talents, we are blessed with one form of currency which we can use to attract people into our life. So, quit looking outside and start looking inside. When you figure your currency, you’ll not only be attractive, you’ll become one of the most highly sought after person when you have developed your talent. So, I will conclude by asking you, what currency do you have?

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design  and Unleash Your Destiny .  He can be reached via info@gloemi.com

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Adding Value

Adding Value: Believe It to Achieve It by Henry Ukazu

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Greetings Destiny Friends,

One of the most interesting aspects of living is the belief factor. What somebody believes in has a role to play in how his life unfolds. It can either make or mar him.

If you are asked what you believe in, what’s likely going to be your response?

There are different kinds of beliefs, especially as it relates to religion. Catholics have their belief; atheist have their belief; Buddhists have their belief; protestants have their belief; Muslims have their belief; Orthodox have their belief, even traditional native doctors have their own belief.

It’s instructive to note that it is what you believe that would work for you. Let’s take a case study of traditional native doctors. When people go to them to find a solution to their problems, the native doctors will give them different herbs or concoction with specific instructions on how to use them. Due to fear or their faith in it, their these people would be compelled to follow their instructions to the latter to get solutions to their problem.

What is important here is not really the herbs, drinks, or instruction that was given to the person, but the belief the person has that will make all the difference. If the person doesn’t have faith in the herbs or the concoction, it won’t work for them, no matter how potent it might be.

The same principle is applicable to anyone who is sick. A doctor’s treatment will be of no effect if the patient does not believe in the doctor or the pill administered to them. Recovery process will therefore be slow.

Believing is relative, and so to succeed, one must have a belief system. The belief system of an employee is quite different from the belief system of a religious person, the belief system of a mentee is also different from the belief system of a politician, the belief system of a president or governor is also different from the belief system of a comedian.

If one should look closely, all these belief patterns are different because what works for one might not really work for another. Let’s take a case study of a mentee or employee. A mentee or an employee might believe that if they do their job very well in addition to playing by the rules and being loyal, they stand a better opportunity of getting good opportunities from their mentor or employer. Now contrast this mindset with of a priest or a president. The priest’s main target is to preach the word of God, convert souls to God, and hopefully pray to go to heaven. But the president’s mindset might be to win the next election. The same is applicable to a comedian whose main target is to make his guests laugh, because when they laugh, they will be obliged to appreciate his service.

Do you see that belief factors are relative? As a child, parent, student or professor there’s always something we hope to get. Even as individuals, we have different goals and aspirations. There are some things we might think are not attainable because of our disposition or mindset, but the truth is that there’s nothing we set our mind to do that we can’t achieve if God is with us. The Book of Life states in 1 John 4:4, that ‘he that is in you is greater than he that is in the world’. In his book “Think and Grow Rich”, Napoleon Hill also recorded that whatsoever the mind can conceive, believe, it can achieve it.

So do you believe you can become a Governor, President, the best athlete, soccer player, lawyer, or doctor? Do you want to be a billionaire? If yes, your belief is valid. What’s left is for you to pick yourself up and get to work because talking is cheap.

Again, I will ask you what do you believe in or what’s your belief system? Sometimes, as human beings, we have different dreams and aspirations to attain a certain height, but when faced with the challenges and vicissitudes of life, we tend to give up. In some cases, we might even think our desires and goals are illusions or unattainable due to our background or circumstances facing us, we fail to understand that whether you think you can or can’t, you are right.

Did you know that the universe responds to the energy we put out? If one desires to be the president or professor and he/she puts in the work, the universe has a way of conspiring to make it work.

One thing is clear and certain: in life, we all must believe in something. According to Dr. Yomi Garnett, an accomplished ghost writer, “the fundamental requisite for a successful life is neither how much you know nor how hard you work (although of course, neither is to be trifled with). The most important factor is what you believe and how deep that belief is. You can do more than you can. You can be more than you believe you are, your pattern stimulates your power to achieve”.

If the above statement is studied closely, one will understand that one of the most important factors that determines how successful a person will be is their belief. Regardless of how hard or smart one might work, if one is not intentional about their belief, it will be hard for the person to get to the next stage in life. A case study of interest that comes to mind is Christian Ronaldo and Lionel Messi. Both superb players didn’t only believe in themselves that they would be great, they put in the work that made them great and envy to others.

I can vividly remember an experience I had when I first arrived United States of America. Each time I visit any office, I literally wonder how people type so fast without looking at their screen. In all honesty and sincerity, I was saying how is that possible? My late dad will always respond; most of them grew up typing as children while in school, so it’s nothing new to them.

My late dad will always encourage me to go to school, and by the time I start working and become familiar with the system, I will see myself typing like them, if not better. In all honesty, I thought he was trying to console me. But the truth is that he was stating the obvious because I can categorically say he was right, because here I am today typing without looking at my keypad.

Another experience I had is related to my writing skills. I had poor writing skills that made my supposed mentors use sarcastic words on me. I remember telling one of them, I will be great one day. It appeared like a joke taken too far, but here I am today as the author of two amazing books with the third one in view.

Why are these stories relevant? They are relevant because of my belief system. I didn’t allow my challenges and background to limit me; rather, I was inspired to believe I could do more.

I don’t know what your storyline or circumstances might be, but what I do know is that your belief can play a big role in your life, consciously or unconsciously. Yes you are right; belief and faith work hand in glove!

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design  and Unleash Your Destiny .  He can be reached via info@gloemi.com

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Adding Value

Adding Value: Why You Must Work by Henry Ukazu

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Dear Destiny Friends,

To survive, everyone must work irrespective of creed or cadre. Work defines an individual, and sets them apart.

Working as a human being is however, relative. A student’s main work is to read and pass examination. A parent’s main work is to train their children. An employee’s main work is do the job they have been paid to do. A pastor’s job is to preach the gospel of Christ in addition to leading people to God. An athlete’s main work is to train and compete at global events in addition to winning laurels. The list is endless.

It’s the job every living being does that attracts opportunities to them, and so, staying docile and expecting opportunities to come your way is another way of encouraging poverty, lack and want in your life. In fact, docile people derive a certain level of joy from begging. Some even love freebies, free lunch and introduction for job opportunities just because they think they have the connection to make it work without them necessarily doing the corresponding work or have the requisite skill.

I personally believe it’s only lazy minds, who think that way. Life doesn’t work that way. I have since discovered that the more work one does the more doors and opportunities that come his way.

Speaking from experience, I have observed that some of the opportunities and favours I am currently receiving and enjoying are consequences of the foundation I laid many years ago. One might be wondering how that works. Let me explain a little, the day you sow a seed is not the day you will reap the fruits. Let me be more direct, as an author, it wasn’t an easy feat writing, researching, editing, doing the layout, publishing and printing the manuscript. It was lots of work, and I didn’t know my book would connect me to resourceful persons today.

In addition, the book generated royalties that humbled me to say the least. The moral of this analysis lies in the fact that when I was spending hours doing the work, I didn’t know it would attract the kind of global attention and news interviews that came to me. Now, you see why it’s good to work. Even the Bible states in Luke 10:7, that every laborer deserves fair compensation.

Did you know that if anyone wants to bless you, they will bless you with the work you do. That’s why the book of life states; God will bless the works of your hands. Nobody likes to give out free money. They like their money to work for them. It’s sad and very unfortunate to see people who pray for opportunities, favours, and blessings without doing any work. These lesser minds think money and opportunities will fall from heaven; they fail to realize that it is their work that heaven is waiting to use to bless them.

Did you know that there are things which God has enabled us to do for ourselves, and there are things we need to depend on Him to assist us. Let me explain further; if all your prayer requests are things men can provide, why are you really praying? Isn’t prayer meant for things you can’t do yourself? You pray to pass an exam that your friend read to pass. You pray to get a job that your friend got on merit. You appeal to God for a car that your friend worked for. It looks as if you are abusing prayer, and you want God to give you the things He has equipped you to provide for yourself. It is high time we understood that prayer is not the solution to laziness.

My late dad, Chief Lazarus Ukazu, advised my siblings and I to always work. As a matter of fact, each time he feels we are oversleeping, he’ll wake us up and say we have many years to sleep in the grave when we die, but as we are alive, we must work.

This instructive advice has been one of the best inspirational lessons I have received in my life. That advice made me feel like setting another goal each time I accomplish a major feat.

The importance of working cannot be overemphasized. The difference between high achievers and docile people is the work they do. While high achievers are very intentional with their life, docile people live by chance. While high achievers are determined to break records, and set new records, docile people are always comfortable living in their comfort zone.

In our contemporary society, we literally have no reason to fail because there’s the availability technology and social media to boost the work we do. It’s easy for one to know what we represent by just surfing the internet. So, imagine when frivolities are seen on your page, it will greatly affect you. Then contrast it with when good information is seen of you on the internet. Like I always say, why be local when we can be global?

Did you know that working is like taking a risk, the more work and risk someone engages in, the more opportunities and experience come their way.

In summary, if you are asked, what’s your work or what project are you working on, what will be your response?

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design  and Unleash Your Destiny .  He can be reached via info@gloemi.com

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