Dear Destiny Friends,

When you truly study top performers in any field, what sets them apart is not their physical skill; it is how they control their minds –  Stan Beecham

There’s no gainsaying the fact that everyone loves the good things of life. Every human being loves the best academic, relationship, sports, luxury, vacation, entertainment, professional/vocation, can offer. The same goes for tangible things including food, gift items, clothings, automotive, jewelleries and a whole lot more.

In the same vein, every individual wishes to be the beat in whatever they are involved in. This is because when you are the best in what you do, the world will definitely seek you out.

To understand how this principle works, imagine a patient who is sick and he’s told the only person who can heal him is his supposed enemy who is an expert in a particular field. If the patient wants to live, he has no option but to seek the services of the said doctor.

Again, imagine a coach who is intentional in winning a major competition, he has no option of going to the competition with the best team regardless of whether he likes a particular athlete or not. The same principle is applicable in a professional work environment; your boss may not necessarily like you, but provided you are good at what you do, your boss will retain you. As a matter of fact, it is easier for a boss to fire an employee he likes, but who is not good in what he does than an employee he hates, but who is good in what he does.

The moral of this assertion is that when you are good at what you do, you don’t need much advertisement, your work will surely speak for you.

To get clarity and more insight on how being the best version of yourself works, during the on-going United Nations General Assembly (UNGA) conference, I observed that most of the speakers in the side-events were subject matter experts in their field such as climate change, health, education, security, youth affairs, technology, social development goals among others.

When you have distinguished yourself, it will be easier for people to work with you. It doesn’t matter if you have a degree or not, provided you can show results, and can speak, the world will resonate with you.

In my self-discovery journey,  I have realized that one’s profession is what they are trained to do like an attorney or doctor, but your vocation is what you are paid to do like skilled job or 9-5 – your ministry is your calling, that’s where you find your talent, passion and gift. To be the best version of yourself, one has to be intentional in working on their ministries, and that’s where they will be celebrated.

Did you know you can meet any resourceful person in the world just by working on your ministry or passion. To actualize this, you will need to adopt the pareto principle which says that 20% of the effort, or input, leads to 80% of the output. The goal of this principle is to recognize that most things in life are not distributed evenly.

The key to understanding the Pareto Principle is to identify that around 20% of one’s actions on the most productive tasks lead to the most success. This principle enables us to spot the few important things that are happening and ignore the mass of unimportant and mundae things. which are serving as distractions.

The Pareto Principle is very powerful and it is applicable in many  areas of life, including in business, relationships, learning, and marketing.

To become the best version of oneself, one must endeavor to discover their purpose and have the courage to pursue it with hard work, and believe in the power of luck to actualize it. I say this because it is very true for one to do all they are supposed to do, and still miss the opportunity because they don’t have luck. So, one has to be strategic in positioning themselves for the right opportunity. When you work according to your purpose and gift, it’s very easy for people to see how extraordinary you are.

Being the best does not relate to academics alone, one can be the best parent, employee, friend/partner, teacher, student, leader, athlete, and many more.

The best don’t really come to you by way of words, but actions. One can be the best by knowing himself and what’s unique about him. As a matter of fact, knowing oneself is the foundation of being the best version of oneself. It’s so sad that many people don’t really take time to understand themselves and that’s why they find themselves in a cobweb situation sometimes.

When you know who you are, your strength, weaknesses, personalities and what’s unique about you, you will stand a better chance to make the right choice because you will have clarity. This clarity will enable you to unleash your potential when you fail. It will also assist you to network with the right people, maximize your time wisely, appreciate who you are, and meditate day and night.

Being the best doesn’t always come easy. One must put effort to learning and doing the needful to get the desired attention and traction. Also, one must endeavor to get a mentor, who will advise and constructively criticise where necessary.

In conclusion, to discover what’s best about oneself, one will need to meditate, seek the face of God, know what makes them happy, explore other areas of interest by serving and volunteering in different capacities. Once you discover the niche that makes you happy, please spend valuable time to develop it because the day you discover your gift and what’s unique about you, that’s the day you become a millionaire.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny and Unleash Your Destiny .  He can be reached via info@gloemi.com

Dear Destiny Friends,

Whoever says that money is not good is probably not aware that money solves most, if not all of life’s challenges. Without equivocation, money is good. It facilitates a lot of work and smooths the process. Rich, wealthy, and informed people, who understand how money works, know very well; you can use money to buy time, the same way the poor use time to buy money.

We all desire money but unfortunately, we fail to understand the principles surrounding the making and spending of money. It surely has a secret like any other area of life; every business has a secret, every family has a secret, every individual has a secret, every industry has a secret, every marriage has a secret, every team has a secret, and even every secret has a secret of survival. And if one does not understand the secret of any industry, they will have a hard time navigating through the industry.

Couple of years ago, I wrote an article titled, The Relativity of Success. In that article, I stressed on the importance of balancing life and success. While some people might value money, other parties might value family, career, health or even time. However, most people erroneously think money is the yardstick for measuring success. Yes, money might be one of the yardsticks, but it’s not the ultimate yardstick.

The secret to attracting money is by having a value the world needs. Value is very broad and relative. What might be valuable to someone might not be valuable to another person. But when it comes to money, value is a currency. To acquire this currency, you must either have a service or product that solves a problem.

It’s only lazy people who think they can easily attract money without doing any form of work. Isn’t it true that there’s no free lunch anywhere. Even when lunch is supposedly free, somebody has paid for it. Even if you don’t have a product or service to offer, please endeavor to have a sustainable value, which may be network, access or a form of information which boosts your resourcefulness.

I strongly believe everyone has a form of value, and there’s no harm in asking the question ‘how can I be of help to you?’ Everyone likes a helping hand, even a perfectionist.

According to Dr. Yomi Garnett, an accomplished ghost writer, “the money you will ever need to fulfill your obligations has been kept somewhere for you. It’s in the pockets of the people around you. However, they will release the money to you only if you add value of some kind to their lives. You can do this by offering some services or selling some products. Since you now know where your money is kept, resolve today to discover what product you should sell or what service you should offer to access their funds,  but remember, all you must be in accordance with God’s principle.

Further to Dr. Garnett’s assertion, the money we seek is in someone’s pocket. The only guaranteed way of getting the money is by appealing to their conscience on what works for them. Unless you want to rob them of their hard-earned money, you can do simple research on what they like. For instance, if the person likes jokes, you can consider making them laugh, if the person is a sapio-sexual being, consider investing in knowledge and putting up a programme of interest that can strike a conversation. If the person likes supporting “causes” consider the option of having a Non-For-Profit organization and explain to the person how your organization matches their interest. Nobody likes to invest in what they are not passionate about.

Let me share a personal experience with you. I derive interest in networking with resourceful people, and as much I have met the rich and might in the society. I initially felt that because we are friends, a part of their wealth will flow to me, but that’s far from the truth. When I began to add value to my life by publishing inspiring and educational articles, published my first book, incorporated my company, got interviewed in television, began to market to book, my company and brand, my resourceful friends began to take me serious by inviting me to their club meetings in addition to having high level business conversation with me.

The moral here is that while I was searching for money, there were certain people I wanted to meet, there were certain doors, and opportunities I was hoping to attain, but couldn’t get their endorsement because I’m yet to mature into the opportunity. But when I added so much value, not only did my mentors and resourceful people begin to take me seriously, they also began to relate with me as a contemporary associate.

This principle is applicable in every sphere of life. Whatever you want to do, whoever you would like to meet, and whatsoever you desire, you must endeavor to do some work. Nobody literally comes to you because you appear to be nice. In the grand scheme of things, values, principles, interest, and intentionality that bring people together.

In conclusion, if you desire an opportunity, money, network and many more, you must show relevance for people to take you seriously, and not only invite you to the table, but also offer you a seat.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your  and Unleash Your Destiny .  He can be reached via info@gloemi.com

Dear Destiny Friends,

Nobody is a above mistakes, so goes the popular saying. And everyone, living or dead, has at one time or another, made a mistake or failed in certain undertakings. This however, has nothing to do with how perfect one is, or may try to be, or even how lousy or unprofessional someone is. Even known perfectionists have been humbled by their own mistakes. But nobody should be subdued by their mistakes or failures because they are not as bad as they are viewed. They are actually stepping stones to greatness if well harnessed.

The only person who hasn’t made a mistake in life is the person who isn’t doing anything. Isn’t it true that the more you strive, the more opportunities come to you. When you make a mistake, it simply means you are doing something, and you are learning.

We have all, at certain times and levels, made mistakes in our businesses, academics, relationship/marriage, profession/vacation and even in our personal lives. Mistakes and failures go pari pasu. Failure is the aftermath of uncorrected mistake. When you fail and refuse to stand up, the failure will define you. The same way a mistake will only define you if you don’t learn from it. It’s quite unfortunate some people allow their mistakes to define them.

Did you know that a single mistake can lead to a major mistake that can set one back. Imagine having a resourceful person in your life, instead of learning from the person, you decide to beg the person for money. Imagine also, you are driving, and you miss an exit, one may have to reroute to the next available route to get back on track.

If you have made a mistake, please don’t be hard on yourself. The mistake can be a set up for success. Sometimes, we feel we have lost an opportunity, but we fail to understand that the mistake was orchestrated by the divine because you never know what’s likely to happen in the near future.

The journey to a fruitful life is not really a smooth ride. One will encounter mistakes and failures along the way. The experience one encounters is used to test the character of the person in addition to strengthening them when they fail.

One of the best ways to capture the relativity of mistakes and failures was captured by Dr. Yomi Garnett, an accomplished ghost writer. According to him, “Anytime you fail, ask yourself these questions,; why did I fail? What lessons have I learnt? Am I grateful for the experience? How can I turn the failures into success? Where do I go from here? Who else has failed I this way and how can he help me?  How can my experience help others from failing? Did I fail because of another person, my situation or myself? Did I actually fail, or did I actually fall short of unrealistic high standards? In these circumstances, where did I succeed as well as fail”?

On a closer look of the above statement, one will decipher that both mistakes and failures are needed for success because they have advantages and disadvantages. It all depends on one’s understanding and approach to it. To put it in a more better perspective, see mistakes and failures like a pencil with eraser. When you fail or make a mistake in the journey to life, use the eraser to clean it and then begin again.

If you are intentional in achieving success; whenever you fail, and understand the cause of your failure, you will go to the drawing board to know where you missed it. When you discover the reason, don’t be hard on yourself, just pick yourself up and be grateful for the experience. Remember, if you don’t make mistakes, you won’t learn much. This is because a wise man learns from his mistakes, but a wiser man learns from other people’s mistakes so that he makes minimal mistakes.

One of the reasons people have failed and learnt from their mistakes is because they have accumulated so much practical experience. Imagine a person, who has failed in business or marriage, and is advising you on how to be successful in business or marriage; their advice will come from a place of experience. The same is applicable when they are advising you on what made them successful in their marriage or business. If you are smart enough, you will run with their words.

In our contemporary society, we tend to follow people who have only succeeded in their craft, and apportion little regard to those who have failed. A progressive and intentional mind will have a different mindset because they will know that whatever has the capacity to succeed also has the capacity to fail.

On a personal note, whenever I meet a resourceful person I adore, I always ask the person, what would you have done differently 20 years ago if you had the opportunity, or what has life taught you as well as what would be your advise to a young person who wants to succeed? All these are targeted to understanding the mistakes and failures the person experienced so I can learn and avoid it as opposed to focusing only on the reason they succeeded.

There’s no doubt circumstances, situations and human beings can contribute to the failure of anyone, but one thing is certain, we are responsible for our life because no matter what happens, circumstances don’t say who you are, they reveal who you are.

When you set high standards for yourself and fail, it’s not actually a failure per se, because you are trying to exceed expectations. Be positive and see the high standards as motivating yourself to do better as opposed to setting lower standards and exceeding expectations. The moral of this statement is for one not to be comfortable in their comfort zone.

In conclusion, if you are desirous of making an impact in the society, see mistakes, failures, and experience of life as life treasures. Remember, when you succeed, it is the failures, mistakes and your personal and professional experiences that will form stories. As a matter of fact, most people will be attracted more to your failures than your success because they will learn more from them.

So again, I will ask you, who has failed you, who has disappointed you, what mistakes have you made and learned from, and most importantly, how has your mistake and failures made you more efficient. In answering these questions, remember, don’t be hard on yourself.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your  and Unleash Your Destiny .  He can be reached via info@gloemi.com