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Adding Value

Adding Value: Understanding Oneself: Foundation to Success by Henry Ukazu

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Dear Destiny Friends,

“To know thyself is the beginning of wisdom” – Socrates

Please permit me to begin this article by asking a simple question. Who are you? By this, I mean what you stand for or represent and not what the world thinks of you. It is instructive to note that what the world thinks of you is your reputation, but your character is who you really are.

If an employer wants to know more about a prospective employee, they can ask an open-ended question such as how would you describe yourself in one sentence? What are your strengths and weaknesses? Have you ever experienced a challenge or problem at work? If yes, how did you handle it? All these questions are structured to inquire more about the personality of the employee.

One of the best things anyone can do in life is not only to understand who they are, but also understand what they represent. It will be hard to know what you represent if you don’t understand who you are. If you don’t understand yourself, it will be difficult to understand other people.

According to Forbes, only 15% of the world are self-aware. One begins to wonder, what about the remaining 85%. As a transformational Human Capacity Coach, my company is focused on helping people unleash their potential. To do this, we use our self-discovery and mindset training manual to know more about them by giving them a set of self awareness questions which they are required to answer to the best of their knowledge. It is rather unfortunate that a lot of people don’t know themselves. They just exist as opposed to living.

Self-discovery is truly lacking in our society. When you truly know yourself, you will know your strengths and weaknesses. When you know yourself, you will know your boundaries as regards what to accept from people and where to draw the lines; you will know your personality traits; you will have a clearer understanding of your career path in your professional life; you will know how to interact with people; you will know your core values; you will have a clearer version of your life purpose; and you will be self-motivated. The list is literally endless.

In the journey of life, we engage in a lot of activities we are not supposed to be engaged in. For example, we study courses we are not wired or love to study, and this makes understanding difficult. Some of us apply for jobs we are not passionate about just to pay bills. Some of us even marry partners we don’t really like due to circumstances. Again, the list is endless. All these can lead to frustration and depression if not properly managed. If only we can take a deep breath and ask ourselves some deep thought-provoking questions on what we really want in life, and the reason we are doing what we are doing, the result will be different.

There are many ways to understand oneself. You can understand yourself by staying silent, reflecting about, and observing your life. These acts will help you to practice self-awareness which will ultimately help you to look inward and enable you to understand your feelings, emotions, and your personality. Self knowledge will enable you to know your values, interests, temperament, life mission, and activities to engage in.

As human beings, one thing we should constantly engage in is learning new things about ourselves on a daily basis. Knowing oneself takes time. However, due to desperation, most people don’t practice the art of stillness. When you take time to understand what’s involved in a particular work, it will be easy to solve it in a more efficient and effective manner. There is a story told of a philosopher, who fell into a ditch in front of him because he was too busy to see what was ahead of him.

Again, let’s take the case of Japan with about one hundred and twenty-five million people, which is one of the most industrialized countries on the planet, yet it maintains a level of calm despite the busy nature of the country.

The benefits of knowing oneself is priceless. It will make you confident which will ultimately eliminate self-doubt. It will help you build better and healthy health relationships by attracting the people you need and eliminating people you don’t need. You will be less stressed because you will focus on what’s important as opposed to irrelevant things which will keep your temperament and mindset in good shape.

Self discovery will help you to know your self-worth because no one will price you cheap when you know your value, and you will feel happier.

Furthermore, self knowledge will help you in decision making. When you know yourself, you will be able to make better choices about everything, from minor decisions to major decisions. Your temperament and personality type will be better managed as a leader or rational being.

Self control: When you know yourself, you will better manage yourself. If you can’t manage yourself, it will be hard to manage other people. When you know yourself, you understand what motivates you to resist bad habits and develop good ones. Knowing your strengths is one of the foundations of self confidence.

Resistance to social pressure. Self knowledge helps you to focus on what’s beneficial to you as opposed to other people. According to Bill Cosby, “I don’t know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everyone. When you are grounded in your values and preferences, you are less likely to say “yes” when you want to say “no.”

In conclusion, take time and reflect on this question, who am I? This is one of the most important questions you will answer in your entire life. When you answer this question, you have solved 50% of your life challenges. If you can’t answer this question, and need assistance, you can use the email below to reach out for assistance.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate and creative writer Design Your Destiny and Unleash Your Destiny.  He can be reached via info@gloemi.com

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Adding Value

Adding Value: Sow That Seed by Henry Ukazu

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Greetings Destiny Friends,

The death of a seed is the burial of a forest – Dr. Myles Munroe

The journey of a thousand miles, they say, begins with a single step, in the right direction. Imagine driving a car with Global Positioning System (G.P.S) and you miss an exit. What do you think will happen? The GPS will automatically reroute you to another direction.

Imagine solving a mathematical problem and you have the wrong formula, you are likely to have the wrong answer. Imagine having a legal case and you have the wrong legal principle or issue; you are more than likely to lose the case.

The significance of this narrative is to show you the importance of having the right foundation in whatever endeavor you want to engage in. When you miss the first step, sometimes you don’t have a second chance. The same principle applies to plants, you can’t sow a seed and reap a stone. When you sow the right seed for an orange, you are bound to get an orange. Life simply gives you what you give it to it.

If you are desirous of making an impact in society, you must sow the seed of success, love, favor, discipline, courage, knowledge, etc.

Do you know a seed can mean investment. When we talk of a seed, it means several things to different people. A seed in the hand of a farmer means something different, a seed in the hand of an investor means something else, a seed in the hands of a believer who wants to give it to a pastor means something else, a seed for a volunteer means something else.

Sowing a good seed is one of the best things that can happen to anyone, especially if it’s a good seed that is sowed in fertile ground. Anything you want to do in life, you must endeavor to sow a seed. The sad reality about life is that most people are not willing to sow the seed of success. For instance, if you want to be a receiver you must be a giver, if you want to lead, you must learn to serve, if you want to be a great communicator, you must learn to listen well. If you want to be loved, you must appreciate people.

Most of the success that has been recorded in life came because of the seeds sowed. Martin Luther King Jnr sowed a seed of love and detest injustice. Success managers, employers, mentors etc. are reaping the fruits they sowed when they were employees.  For instance, as an entrepreneur, you must learn the ropes of the business from a mentor, as a student, you must learn the art of internship and volunteering, as a child, you must sow the seed of respect and love to your parents to reap benefits of love and respect at our old age. It’s instructive to note that You see the financial seed you sow today may leave your hand, but it will never leave your life.

On a personal note, when I was in College, I once asked my late dad for money, and he told me if he gives me money, I will use it for school politics. I wasn’t comfortable with the response because that’s not the reality. I remember telling him, if I want to take extra money from him to run a personal business, I will do it and he will bless me not knowing, it’s side money. I told him, if I save him one naira, my children will save me two naira even if I am the richest man on earth, but if I take extra money from him, my children will take extra money from me even if I am as poor as a church rat.

The moral of this analysis is that you sow what you reap. If you take care of your parents, your children will take care of you. If you support your parents, your children will support you.

The question you need to ask yourself is what seed are you sowing for your future? Each and everyone of us have the seeds of greatness in us, but sometimes, we don’t activate the greatness. To understand how resourceful a seed is, when a seed is properly nurtured, it will yield the desired fruit. Do you know a seed that is properly nurtured can metamorphose into a tree, and the tree can metamorphose into a plantation. That’s how powerful a seed can be if properly sowed and nurtured.

If you have a desire to write a book, start a business, go to school, lead, etc., you must sow the seed today, and this seed can take several ways. It can take the form of sacrifice, patience, finance, etc. depending on the seed you want to sow.  It’s instructive to note that the seed you sow today may leave your hand, but it will never leave your life.  As a piece of advice, don’t delay in planting that seed, because the reward can come in years to come when you won’t even remember when you sowed it.

As moral advice, if you have a business, church, school, hospital, organization, family, etc., you must endeavor to seed the seed that will make the desired impact you want to see. That seed can serve as the cause or vision you want to represent to the world. Question: what seed are you willing to sow and what seed would you want to reap?

In conclusion, always remember, if you keep your seed, that is the most it will be, but if you will sow your seed, that is the least it will be. So, sow that seed today.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your  and Unleash Your Destiny .  He can be reached via info@gloemi.com

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Adding Value

Adding Value: Right Timing, Critical for Success by Henry Ukazu

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Dear Destiny Friends,

The Bible records that there’s time for everything under the heavens; a time to sow, a time to reap, a time to laugh, a time to mourn; a time to read, a time to sleep, a time to work, a time to pray, and a time for leisure. The list is endless. When one therefore, apportions the wrong time for the wrong thing, they will surely get the wrong result.

It’s noteworthy that the mistake most people make is spending major time on minor things and spend minor time on major things.

It’s also important to note that application of right timing in the guise of being at the right place and at the right time is critical to success. When one does things at the right time, there’s the tendency that the right results will be achieved.

It’s instructive to note however, that time is the greatest asset available to man. Another of the major mistakes people make in the affairs of life is inability to maximize available time. Nite that if one loses money, they can get them back, if they lose health, they can get it back; if they lose friends, they can get them back, but once time is lost, the possibility of getting it back is close to zero.

When it comes to succeeding in life, there’s a lot of dynamics that comes to play. But what is more significant is the timing of your success. But many people fail to understand that before one can succeed in any craft, they must develop capacity and competence in certain fields of life.

When you have done the needful, it will be easy for people to assist you. It’s sad to see people looking for opportunity, but haven’t developed the capacity to thrive when given the opportunity.

What most people fail to understand is that there’s time for everything. No matter how hard you work, if your time has not come, you’ll not get the desired opportunity. So, pending when your time comes, continue to add value to your life by reading, acquiring new skills, taking certification classes, and attending to your personal and professional development.

When you have truly added value to your life, it will be easy for people to identify with you. On a personal note, there are resourceful people I have tried to connect with for opportunities in the past; they didn’t respond to me. But when I added value to my life, they began to associate with me.

Let me share a practical example. After I published my first book, I was marketing it like a desperate hustler because I had no paid job at the time. As a result, most people perceived my book and personality as low value, but when I got a professional job, same people began to see me as a resourceful person, who is not depending on his book for survival.

Furthermore, when I reached out to some of my benefactors for opportunity. They technically didn’t respond favorably, but when I developed capacity, they began to give me attention. A case at hand was when I was introduced to the late Chief Operating Officer of Access Bank, Hebert Wigwe, the potential meeting was cut short due to his death. The interesting thing is that I have reached out to the same person three times in the space of 10 years, but the response wasn’t favourable. But here I am being introduced via capacity.

The moral is that not only is the timing right because the late Hebert Wigwe had a strong passion for mentoring youths, he’s also passionate about education with his pet project, Wigwe University. Again, I developed the capacity to fit into the work he’s doing.

Just like there’s time for everything, there’s also a right time for everybody. Imagine planting a crop at the wrong time, imagine putting the cart before the horse, imagine responding without understanding, imagine putting the wrong ingredients without the right timing, etc. what do you think will happen? You won’t get the desired results. That’s simply how timing works.

No matter how hard you work, invest, read, or do the needful, if your time has not come, forget about it. You might even be the best for a position, but if your time has not come, the universe will conspire to work against you. For example during an election, a candidate might possess the right qualities to win an election, but if the pulse of the nation favors a particular locality, or if the pulse of the nation favors a particular ideology or policy, the citizens might vote another candidate with a lesser pedigree.

To show you how important time is; when it’s time to pass your exam, nothing can stop you, when it’s time to get pregnant, nothing can stop you from conceiving; when it’s time to give birth, nobody can stop you.

When you understand the inherent power of timing, your labour will never be in vain. But if you don’t understand the dynamics of timing, you are bound to labour in vain. When you have done the needful, and still fail, be rest assured that it’s either not for you or it it’s not your time.

To reap the benefits of the right timing, one will have to be patient. A pregnant woman will have to wait for nine months before she is delivered of her baby; a person desirous of marriage will have to wait for the right time to see for his life partner to come.

In conclusion, understand that right timing is not laziness or idleness, so while looking out for the right time, endeavor to do and believe in the best, because by so doing, the universe will connect you to the right network.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your  and Unleash Your Destiny .  He can be reached via info@gloemi.com

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Adding Value

Adding Value: Your Passion Will Be Tested by Henry Ukazu

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Dear Destiny Friends,

In the journey of life, everyone will be tested, and tests come in various ways. Someone can be tested with power, money, love, work, passion, etc. I think the ultimate test one will experience is the test for the love of God. One might be wondering why the test. Well, tests help to determine one’s interest in life. Tests help to know who someone is, and tests help one to be strong.

According to some schools of thought, if you want to know someone’s character, give him money and power. It’s easy for someone to say if I have an opportunity to be in government, I will do this and that, if I have money, I will help the less privileged, if I marry, I won’t cheat on my partner, if I’m employed, I will do my best, etc. The list is literally endless, but the truth is what will determine how effective one can be is the trial they will have to overcome, and this is where the test of life plays out.

Test is not as bad as some people will see it. Rather, it is used to determine how passionate someone can be to a cause. Just imagine someone saying I’m interested in serving humanity. The passion in that person will make the person look for an opportunity to make an impact in the lives of people. The test this fellow will pass might be leaving a well-paying job for a job that not only pays less, but also gives one the opportunity to serve people.

When you are working on passion, you will experience distraction, your love, loyalty, interest, personality, and faith will be tested in several ways. But if you believe in your cause, you will be determined to overcome it by seeing all the trial and challenges as distractions.

On a personal note, I have experienced my own test of passion. After studying Taxation Law at New York Law School, I refused to work in the industry which pays more and settled for a case manager job. In all sincerity, it wasn’t really a case of passion, but a case of lack of interest, joy, and fulfilment in the industry.

Again, writing and publishing articles every week is not an easy task, because it can be draining and energy sapping. If you think it’s easy to write an average of one thousand three hundred words every week consistently, please try it. Be advised, it takes more than passion to write every week. Discipline, interest and most importantly, the grace of God is at play.

It’s worthy to note that passion means different things to different people. Some people derive passion in acting, astronomy, science, computer programing, cooking, dancing, driving, exercising, family/relationship, fishing, health & wellness, investing, ministering, money, sports, praying, reading, singing, writing, teaching, travelling, swimming etc. This interest probably arose from childhood or experience of life.

Think back to when you were growing up, planning your future. What did you want to be when you grew up? A doctor? An engineer? An accountant, a pharmacist? A lawyer? A pilot? Etc. How did you come up with those occupations? It probably had something to do with things you lived to do or achievements you associated with those jobs.

Maybe you wanted to be a doctor because you had a passion for helping people; an athlete because you loved playing sports; a novelist because you were compelled to express yourself creatively.

Sometimes, I see entrepreneurs who have labored for a while and are on the verge of quitting, what comes to my mind is simply, they are not passionate about their business. Don’t get me wrong, one can still be passionate for a cause and still quit, especially when it’s not adding up, but the point I’m trying to share is the drive, believe, interest, determination, and test for the business will be determined by one’s passion never to give up when the challenges come up.

To determine one’s interest and passion, three ingredients come into play, they are love, faith, and hope. One interesting thing about this trial of excellence is that they are intertwined in one single umbrella – inspiration. According to Dr. Yomi Garnett, Faith- opens the doorway to inspiration. Hope powers the forward thrust of inspiration, Love gives divine direction to inspiration. Let’s analyze these qualities.

Love: As fondly stated, love is feeling, the same is applicable to passion. When you are passionate about a cause, the feeling will be different from that of someone who has a different passion. Your passion can be seen the way you love a person or business. You can’t love a person, business, or cause without making an effort to invest in it.

Faith:  This is what opens the door to inspiration. Do you know some people can be inspired by the faith you have in a project? It’s your faith in your business or “cause” you believe that will enable you to invest time and resources into the venture. It’s only fools and uninformed people who invest their time and resources in business ventures or relationships they have no interest or passion about.

Hope: This is the lubricant that fuels the energy to drive home your vision. When people see the vision and passion you have for a project, they will be inspired to join you in bringing it to fruition or reality.

In conclusion, just so you know, regardless of what you are doing or passionate about, just know, you will be tested, but when you are tested, just know the test is to know how much you believe in a project or person.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your  and Unleash Your Destiny .  He can be reached via info@gloemi.com

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