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Adding Value: Choose Your Name Wisely by Henry Ukazu

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Greetings Dear Friends,

We all have names which our parents, godfather/mother, or even good relatives and friends gave to us at birth, and we always like to be addressed rightly and with respect before we respond. Just to let you know how powerful your name can be, if you are called a name that is not yours, there’s every tendency you won’t respond, nor matter how nice it may sound. Even if you are called the right name but with the wrong pronunciation, you might also feel slighted to respond, and even if you respond, you’ll react in a way as to offer correction. This is because names are very symbolic, and according to the platinum rule, people are treated the way they wish to be addressed.

Names are very powerful and they have deep meanings, and as a result, must be chosen wisely. Names are regarded as trademarks/logos and come in different shapes and sizes. Some people even have nicknames which have defined them in different ways. Even in business; the name you choose has an impact on people’s perception, especially your potential clients. Therefore, it is imperatively and critically important for you to consider whatever name you will like to be associated with.

A name is an identity. It is a descriptor that allows people to make quick judgments and assumptions about us. When a particular name is mentioned, a lot of questions normally come to mind. We can even assume what it is likely to be. Our names and identities are regarded as the first impressions people have about us. For example, how we dress, the way we wear our hair, how we behave, and even where we go; all begin with our identity and what we call ourselves. Whether it is religion, sexuality or gender, it is part of an identity that can influence how you present yourself to the world, and how you interact with the world. Depending on the situation and circumstance, what we call ourselves may change. That is why it is important for you to consider the name, group or network you are associated with.

The big question we have to answer is what name do I respond to? As human beings, some of us are very sensitive, some are conservative while others tend to have a liberal attitude towards life. Depending on which category you belong to, you can decide to be the game-changer in whatever situation you are into. You may have been called a dull person, lazy being, slow, ugly, fat, etc., but how you respond is actually what makes the ultimate difference. As you may know, life is not what happens to you, but how you react to it. It should be noted that you can’t stop people calling you negative names, but you can decide to choose what you answer to. As a an advice, don’t answer names you are called, when they call you hello depressed, short, unattractive, unqualified, sick, orphan, just calmly respond, ‘sorry there’s no one by that name around here, I guess you may have gotten the wrong address’. In a rhetoric way, you can also respond, do you mean positive, tall, smart, healthy, blessed, beautiful, handsome, extraordinary, talented, skillful, etc.

Studies suggest that liking your own name is predictive of well-being and happiness, and it also positively affects your self-esteem. But does your name affect how other people treat you? According to Dale Carnegie.

“A person’s name is to him or her the sweetest and most important sound in any language.”   Why then is it so important to call people their true names? A person’s name is the greatest connection to their own identity and individuality. Some might say it is the most important word in the world to that person. This is because it is one of the fastest and easiest ways to get someone’s attention especially when they are teased or praised.

Here are some tips on how you can use your name to influence your brand.

Make it a commitment:

Make a commitment to answer whatever uplifts and support your vision. Once you are subconsciously aware of what happens around you, do yourself a favor to international change the narrative by changing the negative news or information that surrounds you or your business. For example, you can work on your self, business, brand, organization, etc; to the extent, people will recognize you as an excellent or reliable person/brand as opposed to the different labels that bring negative vibes to you. As you may know, the world is governed by perception.

Practice:

Practicing whatever name brand you want to be associated with is a great way to bring change to not only your personal life but your business or brand.  You can do this by calling yourself names of interest that appeal to you. You may be surprised to know it will come back to you. Don’t be concerned about the negative voices you may be hearing from friends or even family members, just continue to work on your craft. There have been testimonies of people who dreamt of being a governor, president, leader of an industry, etc. despite not having what it takes to be the person in the picture. They were able to act it in addition to calling themselves the names and guess what, it’s it came to pass. In one of my articles I published five years ago titled: Dreams Come True, I opined that your dreams are valid and it will come true if you work hard, believe in yourself and have the God factor around you.

Ignore the name tag:

As mentioned earlier, it is up to you to respond to whatever name you decide to answer. Names don’t matter anything unless you give it the needed power/energy it needs to feed on.  Names are like dead woods, but you can activate life into it when you speak life into it. Names work with our minds, when you decide to call yourself love, love will automatically follow you.

Furthermore, Ignore the nay-sayers and give your attention to what brings you life, and when you do, the desired transformation will begin to rear up. Personally, I was called names because of my horrible writing skills, but I have been able to author a book by the special grace of God which my detractors have not been able to accomplish. The secret is simple, I never answered the negative names I was called.

Creating Opportunity:

Knowing how to relate with people is a powerful skill that is in high demand. A good personal relation skill will create opportunities for you. It’s like a charm that can disarm even the most hardened person to respond to stimuli. As popularly opined in some social parlance, if a man can make a lady to smile, he’s halfway into her heart. It is important to note that people want to be treated as human beings, not objects. Using their name is the fastest and most reliable way of building rapport and creating a good first impression. Everyone has a name — use it to better connect to them, especially if you work in the customer service position. You will notice a difference in your relationships.

In conclusion, what is your name?

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the author of the acclaimed book Design Your Destiny – Actualizing Your Birthright To Success. He can be reached via henrous@gmail.com

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Adding Value

Adding Value: Introducing the Six Pillars of Success by Henry Ukazu

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Dear Destiny Friends,

Every living is conversant with the word ‘success’. But, what does success really mean to you as an individual? Success indeed means different things to different people. While some will say becoming a millionaire, some others might say, having a family, becoming a chief operating officer, president, or even a celebrity.

All these points are valid, but the key question one is, does all these really translate to being successful? On a personal note, I believe true success is making an impact in society, and most importantly, making an impact on the lives of fellow human beings.

The reason I decided to write on the six pillars of success is borne out from the fact that many people have misplaced priorities. To be successful there are certain boxes that must be checked, though the boxes are not exhaustive, but the ones under review are the fundamentals of success. I will write about three now, and present the remaining three next week.

It may interest you to know that these six topics were culled from my third book (The Six Pillars of Success) which was published about forty eight hours ago, and it’s very detailed with practical information. So, if you would like to know more, you need to grab a copy NOW.

PILLAR ONE: PURPOSE AND PERSONAL GROWTH

Every lasting achievement begins with clarity of purpose and a commitment to ongoing development. This pillar emphasizes direction (knowing why you are here) and discipline, so you can become the person capable of reaching your full potential. It acts like an anchor, helping you make better choices, stay strong in tough times, and move forward in life with clear intention.

Discovering one’s unique purpose is the most important and fundamental aspect of success. As living beings, we are all unique and it’s our uniqueness that sets us apart, and this uniqueness is what will bring opportunities to us. We are built and wired differently.  Isn’t it true that not even identical twins are similar?

Without purpose, one is just existing and not living. We are not meant to exist, rather we are meant to live and have an impact on society. Living on purpose is one of the most important if not the most important thing in life. One of the sweetest journeys of success is achieving success on one’s purpose. One may be wondering how one can know their purpose and how does one live on purpose?

To know your purpose, one will have to go to their creator. Everything in life has a manual.  A computer, car, phone, television all have a manual by the creator which knows how the product functions, any attempt to use the product out of the manual might frustrate the process.

In the same way, every living being was created by God and it’s only God who can determine one’s purpose. Nobody can succeed outside their God given purpose, any attempt to succeed out of your God given purpose might result in defective success. Our prayer is that we may never succeed outside our God given purpose because that’s the place we get fulfillment.

The journey of purpose works with personal growth. When you have discovered your purpose, it will be easy to develop it with personal growth and that involves determination and discipline.

One can’t be truly successful without an element of perseverance and determination. Nobody will hand over success to you, even if you are given a good foundation, one will still have to do some work to build and develop what has already been handed over to them.

For instance, a student who wants to pass an examination must read and do the necessary things. Your parents might get you the materials and your teacher will do the teaching, but it’s your responsibility to do the needful. Moral: Just like power is not handled over to someone, one will have to fight and grab it, so Success is not served a la carte.

So, when you have discovered your unique God given purpose, your next task is to develop it, visualize the future you anticipate, and then you discipline and train your mind for success.

PILLAR TWO: CAREER AND VOCATIONAL EXCELLENCE

Your work is one of the primary platforms where your gifts, skills, and contributions find expression. This pillar highlights the pursuit of excellence, competence, continuous learning, and meaningful impact in whatever field, vocation or ministry you embrace. It is about turning skill into mastery and opportunity into influence.

 

If you agree with me, you can’t build something on nothing. When anyone says, “I am successful, the world would like to know what made them successful. For instance, one will either have a product or service they are offering to the world. Alternatively, one may have a carer or vocation which can be a skill they have developed expertise on after a long period of time.

Career success can be considered the engine of vocational excellence because it helps one to live in their comfort zone and enables one to specialize in setting attainable goals and strategies that can strategically position one to the next level.

It’s sad to see people who love sitting in their comfort zones. They are afraid of taking strategic risk that’s capable of taking them to their level. It’s instructive to note that every next level of your life will demand a different you.

One must be intentional when taking career and professional risks because it is necessary for growth. The ability for one to overcome these barriers will ultimately lead one to the next level.

PILLAR THREE: FINANCIAL INDEPENDENCE AND FREEDOM

Money, as we have established, is not the definition of success, but it is a vital tool for building a stable, impactful, and free life. This pillar focuses on financial wisdom, responsible management, value creation, and the ability to make choices without being held hostage by financial pressure. True independence emerges when money becomes a servant to your purpose, not a master.

When we talk about success this. This is the area most people look up to. They want to know if one has financial stability which entails financial independence and financial freedom. There’s no doubt excellence breeds success. When one is good at what they do, it’s normal for them to get favors and opportunities which will ultimately bring goodwill and money to them.

Financial independence is one of the rubrics one can use to determine how successful one is, however, the big question begging for answer is how much is one expected to have? That’s a relative question because having money, being rich and being wealthy means different things to different people. While some people are grateful with what they have provided, it can solve the basic needs of life, others will have greed to accumulate wealth to the detriment of mankind. Isn’t it true that a poor man is considered rich when he has contentment and a rich man is considered poor if he’s greedy.

In understanding financial freedom, it’s expected for one to understand how the psychology of money works; one should also pay detailed attention to how to earn and multiply money. Effort should be invested in understanding the value of time in accumulating wealth and the concept of value which is the oil and commodity that attracts money.

Money does not come to one, one must be engaged in something of value. When money comes, one must plan for it by investing, budgeting wisely, spending wisely and saving. Be advised, if you don’t save money, money won’t save you, so save money so money can save you.

In conclusion, as you are about to embark on these six pillars of success, you must ask yourself the fundamental question, who am I? This is the mother of all questions because success lies in knowing oneself. That’s the foundation of success because when this part has been figured out, it will be easy to build other platforms.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design  and Unleash Your Destiny .  He can be reached via info@gloemi.com

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Adding Value

Adding Value: Success and the Biological Clock by Henry Ukazu

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Dear Destiny Friends,

Biology is the scientific study of life, covering structure, function, evolution, and interaction. The key branches of biology include molecular biology, genetics, ecology, botany, zoology, and microbiology. For your information, this article is not about health, nor is it about science. It is rather about inspiration, motivation, creative thinking and the relativity of how the biological clock of success works in the attainment of success.

As a trained and passionate Human Capacity Development expert, we shall explore the meaning of the biological clock of success from a different perspective. However, it’s important to make a full disclosure here. I am not a biologist, nor do I have a medical background. However, if you can give me a little bit of your time, you’ll understand what I mean by the biological clock of success.

As human beings we all have our biological clock, and this biological clock means different things to different people. For instance, A woman’s biological clock refers to the natural decline in fertility, which begins gradually in the late 20s, becomes more pronounced after age 35, and drops sharply by age 40, The male biological clock begins to tick in the mid-to-late 30s, with a more significant, accelerated decline in fertility and semen quality often occurring after age 40 to 45.

Again, for ladies, it is generally said that menopause typically starts between the ages of 45 and 55, with the average age being 51–52 in the U.S.  As a student there’s an acceptable time for students to attend elementary school, High School and College. Even though this is not a set rule, it is however believed that when students follow the acceptable standards, it helps to smoothen their academic and professional journey.

For a single man/lady, there’s an acceptable time for marriage which if followed diligently, can have a great and positive impact in the raising of kids. My late mother used to say, when your mates are running, please run with them.

In the journey of life, there’s time for everything, when you miss your miss time, sometimes, it can be hard to catch up. Imagine, if you have a scheduled time to catch a flight, if you don’t get to the airport within a certain time, one might miss their flight because by the time one is done with the checking and custom, it might be late. That tells you, there’s time for everything. In the same manner, in whatever one would like to do in life, there’s time for everything, by the time one misses the appointed or set time, it might be hard to get it back. That’s why it is generally said, when you can lose your money and get it back, you can even lose your health and get it back, but when you lose your time, it will take a miracle to get it back.

In life, each and everyone of us has our biological clock of success, the time of success for Mr. A is quite different from the time of success for Mr. B.  Some people attain success during their teenage years, while some in their 20’s, 30’s, 40’s, 50’s, 60’s and 70’s. For instance, President Theodore Roosevelt became the United States of America President at the age of 42 which made him the youngest US President, while President Joe Biden became the oldest US president at the age of 78.

As a business owner, some might start a business and break even during their first year, while another person might start a business and break even in their fifth or tenth year. The same principle is applicable for a young student who graduates from college and couldn’t get his dream job until five years later but contrasts it to another student who graduates and gets his dream job within months of graduation. How about a lady who got married and had a child in her first year of marriage, while another person might have a child in 10th year of marriage despite marrying first. There are many twists about this, but here is the message, what matters is not how far, but how well.

This is because no matter how long it took you to get your degree, it may take many failed relationships to find love but you found it. A house bought at 65 is still an accomplishment. So don’t let people bully you with their timeline of success.

As human beings, we all have our biological clock. Everyone has their time of success, so keep working on your craft, continue to develop your craft, continue to network strategically, continue to add value and continue to develop yourself. At the end of the day, when the timing is right, everything will add up.

Sometimes, one might be investing time and energy into a project, and it doesn’t seem to add up well, what the person fails to understand is that there might be an invisible hand working which the person might not see. It can be a case of if the person gets the opportunity, they might not be able to manage it, or it will cause them more harm than good because it’s not suitable for them. Sometimes, it can be a case of one not being fully prepared to attract the due respect and opportunity they are looking for because one will never get the desired opportunity they are looking for until they have developed the capacity to receive it.

There’s a saying that one shouldn’t be angry about what didn’t happen, because what didn’t happen might prevent disaster from happening. What that literally means is that in all situations, let’s give God the glory.

In summary, everyone has a biological clock of success, what is important is for us to continue to develop ourselves, develop our product, services and most importantly continue to show up by putting ourselves out for the universe to acknowledge our work and in due time, we will get our flowers.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design  and Unleash Your Destiny .  He can be reached via info@gloemi.com

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Adding Value

Adding Value: Crave the Circle of Your Betters by Henry Ukazu

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Dear Destiny Friends,

A credible relationship is a valuable currency. A great relationship is priceless. The relationship is even more monumental, when it is contracted with persons much better in status, intelligence, reach and spread, and capabilities than one. Several people come into an individual’s life for several reasons; some are parasitic, while a great many others are symbiotic. However, many people still do not understand the value of having a valuable relationship, in other words, a relationship with someone better than ‘you’.

To succeed in the journey of life, one needs to understand who they are, and know what they want. It’s one thing to know who you are, and another thing to know what you want. Some people know who they are yet unable to decipher what they actually want, while some others know what they want, but lack the ability to know who they are. Let me explain.

If you know who you are, it will be easier to see what you want from someone. For instance, the first thing a single man/lady, who is interested in marriage should figure out is who they are (their temperament, strength, weakness, personality, values, and interest). The ability to know these fundamental information will help to figure out who will complement them.

In another scenario, some people know what they want, but don’t really know who they are. This is why I strongly advocate self-discovery training for anyone interested in starting a business or having a life partner.

I can’t underemphasize the importance of associating with people better than you. On a personal note, my most defining moment in the journey of life and business is relationship. Not only is this relationship defining and resourceful, it is valuable and priceless because I relate closely with people better and more resourceful than me.

A wise man once stated that ‘if I have attained success, it is because I stood on the shoulders of giants’. According to the sage, great men have great habits, they carefully select their partners, a step into their life will make a difference in your own life, absorb their books, listen to their tapes and you will be great like them. As a cultured Nigerian man, we have a saying that ‘when a child washes his hands, he will dine with elders’.

One might be wondering the reasoning behind all these parables. Well, the answer is not far-fetched; it’s all about associating with people better than you, and this is all about relationships. If you don’t have a great relationship with people, it will be hard for them to relate closely with you. Relationship is a skill that needs to be nurtured.

One of the secrets of the little success and impact I have made is the people in my life. I have great and resourceful mentors, who have really made great impacts in life. Based on my personal experience with them, they have introduced me to great minds and have given me access and opportunities money and hard work can’t buy. There are heights I know I may never have attain if not because of God and human relationship.

Did you know that just like mercy works with grace, favor works with relationships. Did you know that just like where your prayers cannot reach, your sacrifice can get you there. In the same vein, where your education can’t get you, your relationship will get you there.

It’s unfortunate that many people don’t know the importance of associating with people better than them. You might be brilliant, sophisticated, confident, and maybe even successful, but I can guarantee you that there’s something you will need because nobody knows or has it all. The truth of the matter is that you can’t be shorter and taller than everyone at the same time. So, no matter how brilliant, sophisticated, confident or even successful one may appear to be, there are people who are more brilliant, more sophisticated, more confident and even more successful than yhem, so be humble just as your heavenly father is humble.

In another way, even when people may not be as smart and confident as you are, the irony of life is that someone somewhere is wishing they were half blessed are you are. Do you see the irony of life? Regardless of where you may belong between these two extremes, resolve today to start associating with those who are better than you. If, for instance, you are afflicted with self-doubt, avoid Brother Thomas, instead visit and cultivate Father Abraham, the grand patriarch of the faith family. If you are a stingy person, begin to associate with a generous mind.

Association in life really matters if they are healthy and valuable, but when it begins to affect your mental health, please avoid it because it is what you feed your mind on that it will digest and send to the universe.

In conclusion, be intentional in cultivating healthy relationships because a large chunk of what happens in your life will be shaped by the people you allowed into it.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design  and Unleash Your Destiny .  He can be reached via info@gloemi.com

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