Adding Value
Adding Value: How Your Choice Affects Your Life by Henry Ukazu
Dear Destiny Friends,
The greatest power that a person possesses is the power to choose – J. Martin Kohe
One of the most powerful desires of every individual is freedom. Freedom is characterised by true independence of any human being. When you have freedom, you can decide what you want, and what you don’t want. When you have freedom, you call the shots, and you won’t be deterred by what others feel or think about you.
This is how freedom works; as an employee, you are always at the beck and call of your employer, you will have to do the wish of your boss if you want to keep your job. As a child or apprentice, you are technically bound to obey your parents or boss pending when you are capable of standing on your feet. As a government official, you are bound to protect the government you serve, and where you feel the government is derailing, you can either resign or forever keep your mouth shut.
The origin of freedom can be traced back to the Book of life (Bible) when Adam and Eve were instructed by God to eat all fruits except a particular fruit. Due to the curious nature of man, they were deceived by the serpent which told them that when they eat the fruit, they will see and know what God knows. The point here is that Adam and Eve had unfettered freedom in the garden of Eden, but they messed up the freedom due to the choice and decision they settled for.
Why is freedom important? Freedom is important because it enables us to have a choice. Our choice determines the kind of freedom we will eventually have. If you make the right choice, you are more likely to have more opportunities to succeed, but when you make the wrong choice, you are bound to pay for it. Every choice we settle for has its own consequences, but the good thing about choice is that it prepares us for the greater journey ahead. For instance, during the COVID-19 pandemic, while some people were complaining, creative minds were exploring opportunities because every problem provides corresponding opportunities if you can think out of the box.
It should be noted that every choice you make affect other people. That’s why it’s important to always consider your family and close friends before taking any risk. Avoid making important decisions under any influence. It is imperative we act responsibly because the choice we settle for can define us. According to Winston Churchill “The price of greatness is responsibility”.
Per Sam Silverstein said, “Making choices also mean accepting the idea that we are part of a bigger picture. We are not alone in our choices. Our choices affect not only ourselves but the people around us. Our choices shape our actions. Our actions are received and interpreted by those around us. These actions shape the opinions and feelings of those individuals, and ultimately, the actions they take for or against our behalf.”
Choice is a powerful weapon in the minds of rational beings. To know the importance of choice, take an inventory of your life for the last 10, 20, 30, or even 40 years since you came of age, and evaluate all the mistakes, successes, opportunities and disappointments you may have encountered. One thing is certain, you will wish you can roll back the hands of the clock to either fix the past, or wished you would have done certain things differently.
The good news about making a bad choice or mistake is that it doesn’t define you. Each of us has made mistakes in life and as such it will be foolhardy to be hard on yourself. If you make a mistake, see it as an experience and truly appreciate it because it means you are doing something and learning at the same time. Yesterday can be defined as what happened in the past, and today can be defined as what is currently happening which can translate into opportunities if properly nurtured in order to attract the opportunities of tomorrow.
Why do I make this analysis? It is your mistakes or choices that made it possible for you to have experience which enables you to make a better choice. If you had not made the mistakes, would you be in a better position to make an informed decision? Your answer is as good as mine, so don’t be hard on yourself. The irony of life is that anyone making a mockery of you might have the worst experience. It is just that it’s not seen in public because every one of us is battling with a secret frustration.
Do you know that your choice can be used to determine your interest in life? Choice plays a great role in choosing who you will be your life partner. Choice determines your interest in any academic discipline. Choice determines the kind of businesses you engage in. Choice shows your preference for the food you eat, the cloth you wear and the religion you prefer.
Choice can be related to feelings. But feelings is more attached to emotions. Your emotions can be controlled by how you programme what happens in your mind. Feelings allow you to follow sheepishly without ascertaining the facts. But you have the correct facts, you will know how to act in a normal way. Question. Can you have feelings for a goat? No. When you have facts, you will know it’s improper to have feelings for a family member.
Facts give you awareness to make the right choice – it’s just like when society justify that men are natural cheats. Let me ask you if the creator made it possible for anyone to die when they have sex with someone other than their lawful married partner, will men or ladies engage in indiscriminate sex? The point here is that you can control your emotions and feelings with your choice of thoughts. You can control your feeling because you’re the one having them. Moral: Principles make you calculative, while fidelity makes you intentional.
It’s important to stress that you can control your desires in life because you are in charge of your life. You own and control what you want people to hear, see and feel. It’s just like driving a car. Who controls and directs the car? I agree as humans, we have an impulse, but let’s analyze the issue of impulse with a mad man or woman. We have seen one before, if they are mad, why don’t we jump into a lagoon since we know they are mad instead of walking by the sideway. Why don’t they bump into a moving car as opposed to walking by the sideway? That tells you they have some control; no one is controlling them like a robot. If a mad man or woman can have such control, how much more a rational mind?
Let me share with you how to make the right choice
Follow your conscience
The best way to determine if you are on the right side of life is when you have peace of mind. You can never have peace of mind if you are not at peace with your conscience. Any human being who doesn’t have a conscience is a living corpse.
Explore Options
Before you decide, explore other alternatives. Don’t be in a hurry to make a choice. The more options you have, the better opportunity you have to make the right choice. Take your time to gather all your facts and information until you feel satisfied. Remember, when in doubt, do not act.
Think about the positive outcomes
Always think of the big picture. Quit thinking of the short term. Refuse to make a choice that will make you regret tomorrow. When you make a choice/decision, try and stick to them even if it’s unpopular. No one knows what you feel more than you, neither do they know you better than you know yourself.
In conclusion, we can choose to be happy, or not. We can choose how we react to hard times in our life, with positivity or negativity. We can choose to take responsibility for our actions or blame others for our failures. We can choose to be a victor or take on the role of a victim. What choices are you making in your life? Are they the ones that result in positive consequences?
Remember that according to Any Rand “Every man builds his world in his own image. He has the power to choose, but no power to escape the necessity of choice.”
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He’s a Human Capacity & mindset coach. He’s also a public speaker. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the author of the acclaimed book Design Your Destiny – Actualizing Your Birthright To Success and President of gloemi.com. He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
Adding Value
Adding Value: Embrace Excellence, Create Prosperity by Henry Ukazu
Dear Destiny Friends,
As human beings, our desires and needs can be insatiable. This is because when one task is accomplished, there’s always the tendency to set our minds for another immediate goal. Even when we get our basic needs, we usually have the urge to get another need. There’s nothing wrong with that however, because it’s only unambitious and docile minds, that would like to dwell in their comfort zones.
In the journey of life, everyone desires prosperity, though not knowing that prosperity is actually a human heritage because everyone is born to win. Prosperity however, doesn’t only mean financial breakthrough, but can also refer to health, academia, family, business, and personal improvement. To prosper in any of these areas, one must understand the basics and the necessary appurtenances that come with similar positions.
Let’s take a minute to explain how these factors play a role in creating prosperity. For instance, to have great health, one doesn’t need to spend more; simple personal hygiene like exercise, good rest, good food, good fruits and more, play a great role. When one engages in all these, they will discover their mental and physical well-being will be in good shape. The same principle is applicable to a student who has done the needful in studying the foundational elements of his major; he stands a better chance of getting a good grade.
If the same principle is applied in personal businesses through creation of excellent product or service, one will never lack clients again. In business, customers love good delivery. When your work is good, people will naturally flow towards you.
The family is not an exception. To build a family, the foundation is very important. The same principle is applicable in our personal and professional lives. When one is intentional in building good values and character, it has a way of robbing off the person in their personal and professional lives.
The symbolic nature of this analysis is that for any great establishment, one must be consistent in building it. It takes a process for someone to be successful. So, whether you are building a brand in business, academic, health, or personal development, every single step one takes is very important in the development or success of that project. When you accumulate all the steps, it has a holistic prospect of making one’s brand unique.
Just to share a practical example of how excellence works – Imagine having an opportunity to meet a legend, who can be a president of a country, Chief Executive Officer of a reputable organization, a Governor of a state, a celebrity of high esteem or even a resource person of interest and you begin to request for money instead of asking questions in order to learn more from them, you might lose them. An intentional being can take time to study the person by building a strong relationship via communication, volunteering for the person, reading the work of the person or even by giving them gifts; all these are proactive actionable steps of creating prosperity, which speak volumes about the person.
Most times, when we want money, wealth, opportunities and prosperity, and we think they are far from us, but the simple truth is that they are within us if only we are able to look deep inside ourselves critically. For instance, if you have a business you are engaged in, no matter how little it is, and is diligent in serving your clients with excellent customer service relationships, it has a potential of scaling up, especially when you deliver excellent service.
Did you know one can build excellence by building the relationship in terms of value with the resource persons? It is the positive work one does that will attract global favours and opportunities. The favour and opportunity will not come one day, but I strongly believe it will come, especially when one is working on purpose.
The mistake most people make in life is that they give up too easily either because the desired returns they are expecting are yet to arrive, or they are not passionate, or vision oriented enough about the cause.
Let me share a practical experience. During my formative years in the USA, then I was still working as a security officer, one of my mentors asked me, ‘Henry, what would you want to do with your life in the near future?’ He advised me to take my time to think about the question before answering it. While I was reflecting on the question, he said, what is one thing you know you can do in life, and you know you won’t fail? I said, I want to be a youth advocate.
He said, you have said this quite a few times, but you need to be engaged in meaningful work before your advocacy work will be appreciated. He further asked me, what’s your passion? I said inspiring youths. He looked at me and said, I know you love youth work, but how do you intend to do this? What will you be teaching them? I said, I will be inspiring them. He looked at me and smiled. It was at this moment; I realized I had much work to do. He finally said to me, before you can inspire anyone, you must have inspired yourself by distinguishing yourself in a particular work which will be compelling to the youths because your work will come with commensurate experience and stories.
Looking back in retrospect, I can definitely relate to what my mentor was saying. Why am I sharing this? Excellence does not come in one day. It takes a process. Over a period of about 15 years, I have directly or indirectly been involved in youth advocacy, and this work has really distinguished and announced me in many quarters. My most recent award was from the White House with President Biden’s signature on it.
Now, you see that one’s work, backed by excellence can create prosperity.
According to Dr. Yomi Garnett, prosperity does not create excellence. Rather, the reverse is what holds true. Excellence creates prosperity. Therefore, from today, start the process of discovering your own personal excellence; your own best path to fulfillment. Then, every day, walk that path.”
The moral of this quote above is that money will not make you prosperous. It is your work that will attract money and prosperity for you, when they are good. Isn’t it true that nobody patronizes a bad product? No customer or client gives tips on a bad service. No good teacher rewards a lazy student, and no great company promotes a lackadaisical staff to an enviable height. Again, have you seen that it is one’s work which is backed by excellence that creates prosperity.
In conclusion, if you desire prosperity or want would like to receive awards and recognition, discover what makes you unique, create your own path and serve humanity by solving problems in an excellent way. Trust me, if you diligently do this, you will understand the meaning of the best form of doing business is personal referral.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your and Unleash Your Destiny . He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
Adding Value
Adding Value: Attracting Opportunities by Henry Ukazu
Dear Destiny Friends,
Happy New Year and compliments of the season!
It’s always a thing of joy to see a new day, new week, new month, new year, new decade, and a new century. The occasion really calls for celebration. At the beginning of each year, we all desire to have new blessings, new opportunities, new successes, new health and more. The big question we need to ask ourselves is how one can we attract these opportunities, and blessings attached.
I will try to be practical in my thoughts and opinions. To attract blessings into one’s life is not difficult, in fact, it is one of the easiest things to do. This is because it costs less to be healthy, and it costs more to be unhealthy. It sounds confusing right? Okay, let me explain a little, to stay healthy, one can take fruits, exercise, do a yearly checkup, sleep, meditate, think positive amidst other activities. Literally looking at it, it might appear expensive and hard to accomplish but imagine the cost it will take to visit the hospital to undergo a medical procedure just because you neglected your health.
It’s instructive to note that the human body system doesn’t ordinarily break down, it takes a little bit of process which accumulates. Imagine if one has taken time to do exercise, eat healthy, and rest, most of the illnesses we suffer will drastically reduce.
So, as already stated, to attract opportunities and blessings into one’s life is not difficult; it’s just a matter of attitude. Like I always say, you’ll get what you want faster when you help other people to achieve what they want. To attract these opportunities is not rocket science, all we need to do is to apply the right attitude.
We are just three days into the year 2025, many of us have made resolutions of what we will do and what we will stop to be productive. Do you know the fastest way to attract blessings into your life is to have a good attitude? Attitude is a currency. Net worth is a currency. Relationship is a currency. Impact is a currency. For one to tap into these currencies one needs to have a good attitude. It’s your attitude that will make people to either like or despise you.
If you don’t have a good attitude, you won’t attract the opportunity that will bless you. Let me share a little secret that has worked for me over the years. I am a very intentional person. Most times, I pay it forward without knowing. I have since discovered that when one pays it forward by helping someone in need, the blessings are usually humongous. For instance, sometimes, just because I want someone to utter a form of prayer or goodwill like it will be well with you; God bless you, you will not lack; may God provide for you and your family, I will intentionally give them money or a kind of support.
Sometimes, I may make a purchase and decide to tell the seller to keep the change if I see the seller is struggling or it will put smiles on the face of the person. This is a skill I have mastered over time. It’s not really easy I must say, but it has over time, worked for me.
So, to attract the blessings of 2025 and beyond, consider offering yourself as a life of service to people in need. Don’t do it with a vested interest. There are many people in need in our society. Find time to see how you can support people financially, academically, spiritually, emotionally and otherwise. Trust me, if you can carry out this assignment diligently, the opportunities and blessings that will come upon you will have a ripple effect.
Again, to attract opportunities and blessings into your life, consider having a mentor with a positive influence, connect with successful people, attend workshops, read voraciously, especially on areas of interest so you can gain expertise, and acquire general knowledge; practice gratitude by showing appreciation and kindness, and most importantly, pray and acknowledge the role of God as a higher power, depending on the faith and belief you practice.
In conclusion, life is generally about you, but not necessarily about you, it’s also about others. When you focus on yourself, your rewards might be less compared to when you focus on others. So, consider having a disposition of love, genuine affection, kindness, support and appreciation mixed with gratitude, and see how life will smile at you. Trust me, the universe will conspire to support you.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your and Unleash Your Destiny . He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
Adding Value
Adding Value: Principles Govern Life by Henry Ukazu
Dear Destiny Friends,
It’s an indisputable fact that life is governed by many principles, of which their successful understanding and application can set one apart from their contemporaries.
Various principles work for various people depending on organization, business, profession and even personal. Therefore, for one to get something from another, they must know the principles they have adopted.
Principles work like magic. According to Bishop David Oyedepo, “When you read, tap from the principles used in the book you have read. To fly on eagles wing, you must tap on the principles on the eagle. You will have to get on his back and spread out the way he spreads his wings, so as to fly the way he flies. That is why you need to follow the principles of the writer of any book you have read so as to get the results the writer has gotten.”
The significance of this post is that whenever you read a book, work in a company or government, there are certain laid down rules, procedures, or principles which guides the establishment, and one is expected to follow them to the later. Failure to do so will warrant sanctions.
Let me share a practical example with you; a couple of months ago, I attended an event and met a highly successful man who can be called a billionaire. While a lot of people were trying to get his attention, I was seeking for a unique way to approach him, I quickly surfed the internet and discovered he’s an author. With that information, I approached him and introduced myself to him. I began by telling him I was inspired by his work, especially his books. He began to show interest in my conversation. I also told him I am an author with a legal background. He was happy to hear that because he’s also a lawyer, in addition to being an author and entrepreneur. I told him, I would like to have a meeting with him for a minute. He gave me his number and said, let’s keep in touch. What he told me was everything I needed to penetrate.
I followed up with an email and read his book. What’s the moral of this story, I learnt what works for him by speaking his language, especially reading his book to know how the principles that work for me. I followed up with him via email on summary of the principles in his book and his interviews and his response was positive. I didn’t stop here. I nominated him to receive the Presidential Lifetime Achievement Award and reached out to him to know if he will be available to receive the award. Again, he responded positively. Guess what, when we met at the event, he told me a White House staff reached out to him saying Trump administration is looking for Black person to work in his administration and as such if he knows of any Black person that would like to work in the White House for President Trump.
Now, here’s where it gets interesting, I didn’t show desperation to work in the White House because I didn’t know details of the positions they are looking to fill, and also the location of the jobs. In a week time, this man invited me to the Bahamas for a family end of the year gathering where only close friends and associates will be present. That to me was huge. Even though I couldn’t attend because I already had plans to be out of the country as the said time, I was glad an opportunity of recognition was accorded to me by a billionaire.
One may be wondering what’s the significance of this story. Well, the moral is that one will have to take the extra effort to know what works for any person in order to work with the person or receive any favor. If I have not taken the opportunity to do some research about this man to discover the guiding principles and ideologies that work for him, trust me I doubt if he would have accorded me that level of respect and recognition, in addition to taking me very seriously.
This principle is applicable to everyone. Whether you are married, in a relationship, in business, seeking financial support for a business, writing a proposal, or working with anyone, your ability to apply this principle will usher you into a new reign. Even if you want to get something from a little child, one must condescend to their level to work with them.
It’s instructive to note that there’s no problem without a solution. The only problem without a solution is the problem the person with the right solution hasn’t appeared. Isn’t it true that when the student is ready the master appears.
As a human capacity development expert, I have discovered that everyone is literally different because as dynamic human beings, we are all unique. This is because what works for Mr. A might not work for Mr. B, and so, your ability to know what works for each individual will go a long way to achieving your desires.
Jus to put this into perspective, every living being has a temperament which can be sanguine, melancholy, choleric and phlegmatic. Again, while some people are introvert, some are extrovert. As a rational being, your ability to use discernment to decipher what works for each individual will go a long way to enable you work with them.
In conclusion, if you would like to get anything done, endeavour to do some background research to know the guiding principles of that person or organization. You can do a S.W.A.T analysis to discover their strengths, weakness, action and time. This will enable you to know how to approach them. You can also do online research on social media to know if they have any book to their name, any speech, any song, or any article they have written just to get an idea of how their mindset works. It might not generally give you a full picture of who they are because they might be engaging in a professional capacity, but at least it will give you an insight into their objective being.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your and Unleash Your Destiny . He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
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