Connect with us

Opinion

Voice of Emancipation: Dealing with Grief

Published

on

By Kayode Emola

Life, they say, is fleeting and one thing that is certain for every mortal is death: a debt that is owed by us all, and that all of us will surely one day pay. The only thing is that no one knows when he or she will pay this ultimate price. However, once this price has been paid, it is not those who have died who are burdened with the cares of this world any longer, rather it is those left behind who must bear this grief.

Many of us have faced grief in our lives at one time or another, and people deal with it in different ways. We face the grief of losing that dream job, house, car, or even loved ones. For some people, the road to recovery can be very difficult and painful, and so this underscores the importance of our need to always reach out in love and support to one another.

When my editor called me last week to tell me that he had lost his mother, I could immediately relate to the pain that he was going through. I personally experienced the loss of my mum at a very young age. Throughout my life I have experienced grief in a variety of situations, however, none can be compared to that which I felt when I lost my mum to the cold hands of death in December 2003. It is never an easy thing to lose a loved one, and the loss of a parent is the hardest grief of all to deal with.

The difficulties associated with coping with grief is not to be underestimated, so I will share a few tips that did help me deal with this grief at the time. The first therapy for dealing with grief is the amount of information at our disposal to fight this pain. For many, it is not the grief itself that overwhelms them but the after-effect of the grief.

When my mum passed away, my first pillar of support was my dad and what he told me was very remarkable. My dad was around 65 years or more when he lost his own mother, yet he narrated the grief he went through. He told me that it doesn’t matter how many years you live with your mother when she passes on, you will continue to feel the pain until you die. His words struck me, as I thought for him having lived to a much older age enjoying so many wonderful moments with his mum. I thought this would have made him more grateful to spend so many years with her. Yet, it seems, the more time we have spent with our loved ones resonates a deeper sense of grief.

The next pillar of support I received was from friends and family at the time. A lot of people were at our house during that period to offer support in one way or another, ensuring that we were doing well. Their warm words although I cannot recollect all, were very helpful in remembering that death is an inevitable price we all have to pay. My family was very supportive, my uncles, aunts, and other relatives from far and wide helped in every way they can to see that my mum was given a befitting burial and to help us deal with the grief.

However, I must not fail to mention the greatest pillar of support that I received which was from the church. Note that as a young man, I couldn’t phantom why I should lose my mum at that very young age. She was full of life and had many years ahead of her, so it was very difficult to wrap my head around the fact that she is no longer with us. No soothing words could help me deal with this grief until the youth leader read the letter of Paul in First Thessalonians 4 v 13 to me. Paul had encouraged the Thessalonians not to sorrow concerning those who are asleep like people without hope. It is this verse that settled it for me knowing that there is the hope of one day reuniting with my beloved mother.

I know that for some people, a single verse may not bring about the healing that they require and it may take a lot more effort to heal the wounds of losing a loved one. In whatever we go through, from pain to deep anguish, let us remember that there are always people around us we can lean on for support.

Let us not hold back within ourselves and suffer in silence when there are enumerable resources in the world today to deal with whatever grief we face. We should remember that whatever we are going through right now is not new and that others may have even gone through the worst or similar situation. My hope and prayer are that no matter what life may throw at us, we would get all the required support we need to deal with the challenges and come out stronger rather than a broken person.

Continue Reading
Click to comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Opinion

Rivers or Wike House of Assembly?

Published

on

By

By Eric Elezuo

Anybody that knows what Barr Nyesom Wike, who is now the Minister of the Federal Capital Territory (FCT) stood for prior to the events leading to the 2023 General Elections would be highly shocked, surprised or even disappointed at the trend of events in Rivers State, which boldly has the signature of the former and immediate past governor on it.

To the political watchers, observers and practitioners alike, Wike has been an epitome of deliver good governance, shine as much as you can when it’s your turn, and bow out respectfully when you conclude your tenure, leaving your successor, irrespective of the part you played in his emergence, to perform as he could without interference. But that notion seems to have exited through the backdoor since Wike’s political godson, Siminalayi Fubara, became governor of Rivers State on May 29, 2023.

Though feelers of high handedness or excessive demand of state’s resources against Fubara by Wike has not been officially confirmed, the fact that is starring everyone in the face has remained the governor’s inability to perform maximally as a result of Wike breathing uncomfortably down his neck, and using the instrumentality of the state House of Assembly, which is unequivocally loyal to him, making it difficult to further address the House as Rivers House of Assembly

From reports, the travails of Fubara in the hands of Wike and his House of Assembly dated back to the period around August 2023, barely three months into the administration. Events suggested that Fubara was choking under Wike’s stranglehold, and attempted a self-rescue. It backfired as Wike came after him with the full strength of his controlled-Assembly, and then the full federal might.

In a nutshell, the Assembly has on three occasions attempted to impeach Fubara with the third right now domiciled with the judiciary amid court injunctions.

What is more tiring in the renewed fights between Fubara and Wike-House of Assembly, lies in the fact that both the governor and members of the Assembly, who are giving voice to Wike’s songs, just came back from a six-month suspension occasioned by President Bola Tinubu’s State of Emergency declaration.

One would have thought that lasting peace has arrived even as all the state political institutions including the executive and legislative arms have joined the All Progressives Congress (APC), but the reverse seems to be the case. The House of Assembly has invoked Section 188 of the Nigerian Constitution to begin an impeachment proceedings against the governor. They accused him of Gross Misconduct, spread into eight grievous crimes.

But much as the House of Assembly is speaking through the Speaker, Martin Amaewhule, the real voice being heard by Nigerians is the voice of Wike, who controls almost all elected officers in the state.

Rivers State revel in the reputation of being the treasure of the nation, yet in close to three years, no meaningful development has been witnessed as a result of squabbles and skirmishes between the executive and the legislature with Wike in the driver’s seat.

At a time in his history, Wike denounced and condemned godfatherism in politics. It is sad that he is the one playing the intimidation card today after all he has been through in his political life, and all he has confessed with his month.

While it is imperative that Fubara should acknowledge his political godfather, Wike should understand that he has played his part in Rivers State, and is obligated to allow Fubara play his, or wait for the next election to mobilise to vote him out. But the fact from all indication says the bone of contest is on political agreement more than constitutional infraction. And that renders the whole process more shameful.

The pride of Rivers State, not those of individuals, is at stake, and needs to be salvaged. Wike should shealth his sword, and let peace reign.

The House of Assembly belongs to Rivers people, and not Wike.

Continue Reading

Opinion

Re-engineering the Mind: A Pathway to Freedom for Peoples, Corporates and Nations

Published

on

By

By Tolulope A. Adegoke PhD

“The most formidable borders we must cross are not geographic, but cognitive. True sovereignty—for peoples, corporates, or nations—begins with the courageous act of dismantling the internal architectures of limitation and rebuilding with the materials of our own authentic possibilities.” – Tolulope A. Adegoke, PhD

We live in a world shaped by history, yet our future is not predetermined by it. One of the most profound challenges facing individuals, corporations, and nations, particularly in contexts like Nigeria and Africa—is the legacy of mental colonialism. This isn’t merely a historical discussion; it’s about the unconscious frameworks that continue to dictate how we think, what we value, and what we believe is possible. Decolonizing oneself from this “mental slavery” is the essential first step toward delivering genuine, self-determined possibilities. This process requires honesty, courage, and a deliberate reclamation of thought.

Understanding the Invisible Chains

Mental slavery is the internalization of a worldview where the former colonizer’s culture, systems, and standards are seen as inherently superior, universal, and the sole benchmark for progress. It manifests in subtle ways: the devaluation of local languages and knowledge, the preference for foreign goods and credentials over local ones, and the persistent narrative that real solutions must always come from outside. This mindset creates a ceiling on imagination, fostering dependency and a crippling doubt in one’s own innate capacity to innovate and lead.

The Personal Journey: Reclaiming Your Inner Narrative

For the individual, decolonization is a deeply personal journey of unlearning and rediscovery. It starts with critical self-reflection.

  • Questioning Knowledge: It asks, “Whose history am I learning? Whose definition of beauty, success, and intelligence have I accepted?” It involves actively seeking out and valuing indigenous philosophies, like the Ubuntu concept of “I am because we are,” not as folklore but as viable, sophisticated frameworks for living.
  • Redefining Value: It means measuring personal success not only by proximity to Western lifestyles but by contributions to community, by cultural continuity, and by personal integrity aligned with one’s own roots.
  • Language as Liberation: It recognizes the power of language to shape reality. Embracing one’s mother tongue in thought and creative expression becomes an act of resistance and a reconnection to a distinct way of seeing the world.

The Corporate Transformation: From Extraction to Ecosystem

Businesses and organizations are often perfect mirrors of colonial logic, built on hierarchical control, resource extraction, and the standardization of Western corporate models. Decolonizing the corporate sphere requires a fundamental shift in purpose and practice.

  • Beyond Exploitation: It moves from a model that extracts value (from people, communities, and the environment) for distant shareholders to one that generates and circulates value within local ecosystems. It prioritizes regenerative practices and community equity.
  • Innovation from Within: It rejects the mere copying of foreign business playbooks. Instead, it looks inward, developing uniquely African management styles, products, and solutions that respond to local realities, needs, and social structures. It sees the informal sector not as a problem, but as a reservoir of resilience and ingenuity.
  • Partnership Over Paternalism: It abandons the “savior” complex—the idea that development is “delivered” from the outside. A decolonized corporate entity positions itself as a humble partner, listening to and amplifying local agency and existing expertise.

The National Project: Reimagining Governance and Identity

For nation-states like Nigeria, the legacy is etched into the very architecture of the state: borders that divide ethnic groups, economies structured for export of raw materials, and educational systems that glorify foreign histories.

  • Institutional Reformation: True decolonization necessitates the courageous reform of institutions. This means auditing legal systems, constitutions, and national curricula to root out colonial biases and integrate indigenous knowledge and juridical principles.
  • Economic Sovereignty: It demands a strategic, deliberate reduction of dependency. This involves prioritizing regional trade (like the African Continental Free Trade Area), adding value to natural resources locally, and investing in home-grown technology and manufacturing. It is a pivot from being a primary commodity exporter in a global system designed by others to being an architect of one’s own economic destiny.
  • Cultural Agency: On the global stage, a decolonized nation defines itself. It conducts diplomacy based on its own historical experiences and philosophical foundations, not merely by aligning with blocs formed by colonial histories. It tells its own stories, controlling its narrative.

Nigeria and Africa: The Crucible of Challenge and Promise

Africa, with Nigeria as its most populous nation, is the undeniable focal point of this global conversation. The continent’s challenges are real, but they are too often diagnosed through the very colonial lens that contributed to them. Nigeria’s specific struggle—to forge a cohesive national identity from its stunning diversity, to manage resource wealth for the benefit of all, and to overcome governance failures—is a direct engagement with its colonial past.

The “African Renaissance” envisioned in frameworks like Agenda 2063 is, at its heart, a decolonial project. It seeks an Africa integrated by its own people’s design, powered by its own intellectual and cultural capital, and speaking to the world with confidence and authority.

A Universal Call: Why the Wider World Must Engage

This is not a project for the formerly colonized alone. The wider world, including former colonial powers and global institutions, has a responsibility to engage.

  • Acknowledgment and Equity: It begins with a sincere acknowledgment of historical injustices and their modern-day economic and political echoes. It requires moving from a paradigm of charity and aid to one of justice, fair trade, and equitable partnership.
  • Enriching Humanity: Ultimately, decolonizing the mind enriches all of humanity. It frees everyone from the limitations of a single, dominant story about progress and human achievement. It opens the door to a world where multiple ways of knowing, being, and creating can coexist and cross-pollinate, leading to more resilient and innovative global solutions.

Conclusion: The Freedom to Imagine Anew

In this moment of global reckoning and transformation, the work of mental decolonization is not a luxury; it is an urgent necessity. It is the hard, internal work that must precede lasting external change. For the individual, it delivers the profound possibility of wholeness. For the corporation, it unlocks sustainable innovation and authentic purpose. For nations like Nigeria and for the African continent, it is the non-negotiable foundation for true sovereignty and transformational progress.

The ultimate deliverable is freedom—the freedom to imagine a future unbounded by the past, and the agency to build it.

Dr. Tolulope A. Adegoke is a Distinguished Ambassador For World Peace (AMBP-UN); Nigeria @65 Leaders of Distinction (2025); Recipient, Nigerian Role Models Award (2024); African Leadership Par Excellence Award (2024). 

He can be reached via: tolulopeadegoke01@gmail.comglobalstageimpacts@gmail.com

Continue Reading

Opinion

Dele Momodu’s Arrival: Day ADC Became Heavier

Published

on

By

By Dr. Sani S a’idu Baba

What does loyalty mean to you in friendships, family, or work? To me, loyalty is staying true, honest and supportive even when it’s hard. That truth defines my relationship with Chief Dele Momodu, whom I more often refer to as the pride of Africa. My loyalty to him is non-negotiable. It is not seasonal, transactional, or driven by convenience. It is rooted in conviction. So, the moment he collected his membership card of the African Democratic Congress (ADC) in his hometown of Ihievbe, Owan East, Edo State, I did the same in Kano. In that instant, distance dissolved, and purpose aligned. What happened yesterday was not just a decamping; it was a declaration. A declaration that the long, hard road to Rescue, Recover and Reset Nigeria has gained one of its most formidable travellers.

This is indeed a remarkable day for the ADC. While many defections into political parties come and go with the tides of ambition, Dele Momodu’s entry stands apart, loud in meaning, deep in symbolism, and heavy with consequence. For the ADC, this is not merely the acquisition of a new member; it is the embrace of a movement-builder, a conscience-keeper, and a bridge across Nigeria’s fractured divides, and these qualities are evident in his record.

First, Dele Momodu’s political pedigree is rare and refreshing. In an environment where political loyalty often bends toward power, he has never been part of the ruling party throughout his entire political life. This is not stubbornness; it is principle. It means he understands opposition not as noise-making, but as nation-guarding. He knows how to put governments on their toes firmly, intelligently, and fearlessly. The ADC has gained a man perfectly schooled in democratic vigilance, one who knows that true progress is sharpened by principled opposition.

Second, the ADC has gained a tested pro-democracy fighter in Dele Momodu. He paid a personal price during the military era for resisting dictatorship and standing firmly for democratic rule in the Third Republic. That history of sacrifice now translates into a major advantage for the ADC: a leader with the moral authority, experience, and courage to constitutionally, peacefully and intellectually confront the growing threat of a one-party state and one-man dictatorship. With Dele Momodu in its fold, the ADC is better equipped to defend democracy and lead the national effort to recover Nigeria from authoritarian drift.

Third, he is widely recognized as one of the most principled and loyal politicians Nigeria has produced. When Dele Momodu commits, he commits fully. No half-measures. No double games. No conditional loyalty. If he belongs to a party, he supports it wholeheartedly and unconditionally. For the ADC, this is priceless. In a time when political parties struggle with internal contradictions and wavering allegiances, here is a man whose word is his bond and whose presence strengthens internal cohesion.

Fourth, the ADC has attracted not just a member, but a truth-teller. Dele Momodu derives pleasure in saying the truth as it is, without varnish, without fear, without apology. Parties rise or fall not only by their slogans but by their capacity for honest self-examination. With Momodu in the ADC, the party gains its greatest advisor and most reliable mirror. He will celebrate what is right, challenge what is wrong, and insist on moral clarity. This is how serious political institutions are built.

Fifth, Dele Momodu is a magnet. He attracts highly responsible, competent, and patriotic Nigerians from every corner of the country. Many see him as a part-time and independent politician, one whose ultimate allegiance is not to party symbols but to Nigeria’s soul. That perception is powerful. It means that wherever he goes, Nigerians are ready to follow, to join, and to support. By welcoming him, the ADC has sent a clear signal to the nation: this is a home for credibility, courage, and Nigeria first politics.

Wherever Dele Momodu goes, Nigerians at home and in the diaspora admire him effortlessly. He never gets tired of engaging, mentoring, inspiring, and mobilising. Without any noise, he becomes a vehicle of mass mobilisation. With him, the ADC’s message will travel farther than billboards, deeper than rallies, and faster than propaganda. This is influence earned through decades of credibility, not imposed.

I speak from experience. I was the North-West Coordinator of the Dele Momodu Movement in 2022 when he contested the presidential primaries under the PDP. I later served as his agent at the primaries held at the Moshood Abiola Stadium, Abuja, on May 28, 2022. I went round with him all over Nigeria, and from that experience, I came to truly understand the perception of the ordinary Nigerian about the extraordinary pedigree of Dele Momodu, how people see him as consistent, authentic, accessible, and genuinely committed to Nigeria’s progress.

Sixth, the ADC has attracted a great promise-keeper in Dele Momodu. Let me back this claim with facts. I was among those who accompanied him to the screening before the PDP presidential primaries. When he came out and journalists asked him questions, his response was characteristically clear and sincere: it is totally about Nigeria, nothing personal. He went further to announce the promise he took during the screening, that he would support whoever emerged as the party’s candidate to victory, and he kept that promise. As great globetrotter that he is, no one can easily recall when last Dele Momodu stayed in Nigeria for months, working assiduously for the success of his party and its candidate, His Excellency Atiku Abubakar. While many others who took the same promise were busy throwing tantrums, he was on the field, mobilising, advocating, and delivering. That was a promise kept.

But beyond politics lies the most compelling asset Dele Momodu brings to the ADC: his story. The turbulent but triumphant journey of his life can draw tears not only from the over 140 million Nigerians living in extreme poverty today, but from anyone who understands struggle. It is a story that melts hearts across class, age, and geography. Relatable. Poignant. Edifying. It speaks directly to the Nigerian who feels forgotten by birth or battered by circumstance. It tells you that you may be a rejected stone today, penniless, down and out but you can become a chief cornerstone tomorrow. Not by cutting corners, but by patience, consistency, building networks of influence, embracing hard work, and staying faithful to your dream. Perhaps this is why Dele Momodu is arguably the Nigerian mentor with the highest number of mentees across every nook and cranny of this country, myself included. His mentorship culture is organic, generous, and transformational. He opens doors, builds people, and multiplies hope. For the ADC, this is a strategic advantage that cannot be overstated. A party that attracts Dele Momodu automatically attracts thousands of thinkers, professionals, youths, and patriots he has inspired over decades.

Dele Momodu is in a class of his own. Naturally unique. Authentically Nigerian. Globally respected and travels road less travel. His life proves that greatness can rise from adversity, and leadership can be forged without bitterness. With his entry into the ADC, the party has not just caught a “big fish”; it has netted a tide-changer. Yesterday, in Ihiebve, history was made. From Edo to Kano, from the grassroots to the global stage, a new chapter has begun. The ADC is no longer just preparing for the future, it is recruiting it. And with Dele Momodu on board, the mission to Rescue, Recover and Reset Nigeria has found one of its strongest voices and most trusted hands.

The journey ahead is demanding. But with men of principle, truth and influence like Chief Dele Momodu, the ADC is no longer asking Nigerians to believe. It is giving them a reason to.

Dr Baba writes from Kano, and can be reached via drssbaba@yahoo.com

Continue Reading

Trending