Adding Value
Adding Value: Understanding Yourself by Henry Ukazu
Published
3 years agoon
By
Eric
Dear Destiny Followers,
The more you know yourself, the more patience you have for what you see in others.” – Erik Erikson
One of the best things to happen to any individual is the ability to know himself.
If you are asked, who you are. What will be your response? To truly understand yourself, one must be able to know his strength, weakness, passion, interest, vision, and most importantly, what he represents or stands for.
Just like life is a continuous learning process, understanding oneself is a life journey. We never get to fully understand ourselves and our capability. That is why when we achieve an uncommon feat, we are literally humbled. Again, when we are faced with a dare-devil situation like being broke, provoked, bullied, etc., one will be surprised to notice how he may react. It is therefore, difficult to say ‘I know myself’ because actions and reactions may sometimes differ.
As a Human Capacity Coach, my focus is to help every rational being discover their innate ability because it is only when they understand their innate ability, that they will be able to unleash their potential. It is important to state that we are all different and endowed with certain alienable gifts, talents and skills. Your duty is to uncover all the hidden potentials you have. Nobody knows you more than you know yourself. If you feel you have potential, dreams, goals, and inexplicable passion to birth a goal, but don’t know how to actualize, I will strongly advise you to find a coach to help you actualize it.
One of the worst feelings anyone can ever have is to live in regret. The greatest challenge most people have is that though they are truly inspired listening to great speakers, mentors, leaders, pastors, etc. they lack the implementation strategy, which is why we all need a coach.
Understanding oneself comes in different dimensions. A man/woman will not say he/she has fully and truly understood themselves until they marry. Sometimes, you may not know your potential until you have an encounter with a life-transforming coach, mentor, or with God who literally open your eyes to see a new version of yourself. To understand how understanding oneself really works, imagine being in a room with total darkness and the light is turned on, your countenance, feeling, focus, vision, understanding will be totally different because you’ll derive an uncommon strength from the light. That’s how you know the level of potential and capabilities in you when you understand yourself.
Understanding oneself, in the simplest of terms, is illuminating your lie positively.
The question now becomes how does one understands himself. I will be sharing some tips to guide you.
Know your purpose
Your mission on planet earth is for a purpose. You have an assignment and divine mandate to fulfill your purpose. You can’t be existing instead of living. It’s sad to note that the graveyard is the richest place on planet earth because that’s where many talents are buried. There are many dynamics to finding your purpose. To discover your purpose, you can reach out to your creator, listen to yourself, and know what you are not comfortable with in the world.
Take personality test
Some people find this resourceful. There are several tests available. I don’t know if it truly works. But you can consider giving it a try. For instance, the “Myers-Briggs Personality type theory says that all people have one of sixteen different basic personalities. These personalities can predict how you interact with people, the kinds of interpersonal problems and strengths that you have, and what kind of environment you live and work in best”.
Be vulnerable
Vulnerability is truly underrated in our society. Only strong people and leaders are willing to share their weaknesses, experience, and failures. You are not truly free until you have lived your life without caring what other people are saying. On your journey of life, you don’t have to be hard on yourself. Give yourself the permission to explore new things by taking risks and you’ll understand who you are and what you are capable of doing.
Many people expect too much from themselves and when they don’t achieve their set targets and goals in life, they feel they are failures. This shouldn’t be the case. It’s your life and nobody’s life. So, live it to the fullest. Tomorrow your mistakes will serve as an experience and learning curve. You’ll even laugh at them when you reflect. So, relax and enjoy the moments by traveling, getting an education, and having fewer expectations from people. Life is too short to live in regrets.
Be yourself
Don’t try to be like others. You must come to the realization that not everyone is going to like you. According to Oscar Wilde, be yourself, others are taken. Don’t try to fit in. Be the original version of yourself. This might be hard, but when you are your authentic self, your original friends will come close to you because they resonate with your work, but you when are fake, your original friends who are supposed to add value to your work will depart, and only fake people will resonate with you. Trust me, being fake is expensive while being true to yourself is cheap because you don’t have to spend or please anyone.
Do what makes you happy
One of the best ways to know oneself is by engaging in acts that make one happy. If I may ask you, what are your hobbies, what is the one thing you can do for free even if you are not paid for it?
How do you react?
It is widely stated that circumstances don’t say who you are, they reveal who you are. It’s not always right to assert how we’ll react when we are faced with different situations, because our reactions might be different when the occasion or situation rears its ugly head. One of the ways to know a man is to give him power, money, and riches. If he is able to overcome the pressures and temptations by managing them without them managing him, he’s truly a man.
In conclusion, regardless of what you may have experienced in life, don’t be hard on yourself; forgive yourself and if you feel you need someone to assist you in working through life, understanding oneself and how to unleash your potential by overcoming the challenges, setbacks, and failures of life, I’m here to assist you.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He’s a Human Capacity & mindset coach. He’s also a public speaker. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the author of the acclaimed book Design Your Destiny – Actualizing Your Birthright To Success and President of gloemi.com. He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
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Adding Value
Adding Value: Disguised Blessings by Henry Ukazu
Published
2 days agoon
May 10, 2025By
Eric
Dear Destiny Friends,
There is no doubt everyone experiences different levels of pain and disappointment when things or life don’t go as planned. Many thoughts naturally run through minds. Depending on the issue on the ground, one might wonder what he did wrong, or what he could have done differently. More questions such as ‘was my request too much, did I act too fast or slow, was my approach bad, was my work untidy, did I under prepare will continually flash tbrough the mind? No doubt, the mind will be busy wondering what caused the failure.
Ordinarily, they are supposed to make us feel frustrated, especially when it is an opportunity we have been praying to have. Imagine having an idol, celebrity or an influential leader who can change your life giving you an opportunity, but for reasons beyond your comprehension or articulation, you couldn’t seize the moment to create a lasting impression; an lost opportunity.
Trust me, I can relate to the feeling having experienced similar fate on several occasions. There are relationships that I have lost either because I was naïve or couldn’t nurture it well. However, one may try to look at it, life may not always go as planned; one may be planning out his life and God or the universe will be planning something else. Sometimes, what we thought might be good for ourselves, might not really be good for us.
Let me share a practical story; during my formative years in the United States of America, I worked as a security officer for a decent amount of time, while still applying to many other companies. Though I couldn’t secure a decent paying job, I didn’t lose hope either, I kept my hope alive. It is important to state that I was frustrated and felt depressed. I wondered when my life will change for the better. It got to a stage I felt only a miracle can change the course of my life because people who have less capacity, competency and capability than me were getting opportunities and I began to wonder if I was cursed. Many thoughts were running through my mind. But what gave strength were the words of my Registrar while at New York Law School. According to him, if you lose all options, don’t lose hope.
One thing I did was to maximise my present status as a security officer and used the opportunity to network during the day. I attended events of interest in the morning, afternoon and nights. Sometimes. I will go to work from the event.
In all honesty, I didn’t know the people I met during my formative years while working as a security officer will be instrumental to who I am today, and what I will be doing in the near future. Why do I say this? I know for a fact, assuming I had a decent paying job after my law school program, I doubt if I would have had time to write my first book and as well, attend events and network with the high and mighty in the society.
When I look back, I will say this is a disguised blessing because all these people came in handy to support my work when I published my book.
Furthermore, there was a time I missed a Presidential Lifetime Achievement Award event, an award that could have changed the course of my life. While I was troubled by the incident, a mentor of mine said to me, “don’t grieve for what didn’t happen because what didn’t happen could prevent disaster from happening”. This is so true because sometimes we might not know the people we meet, who can do harm to us in the nearest future which we might not know, so the creator of the universe can cause a scene or situation that will prevent the relationship from going forward.
It can also be a case where one is looking for a job, and the job might be that which will consume the fellow in the nearest future. So, when one gets denied the opportunity of working, instead of crying over spilled milk, consider seeing it as disguised blessing, which can be a bigger company that might offer you more benefits. It can also be a case of maybe, your destiny helper might be in the company that offers you less pay as opposed to a bigger company that one is aspiring to get, but was denied.
In the journey of life, sometimes one must refuse to capitalize on one’s gain, this is because anyone can do that, but what’s more important is to profit from the loss, because that requires a certain degree of intelligence.
Disguised blessings can come in different forms, for instance while some people are begging because one of their legs is amputated, another person has won Gold at Paralympics because both legs are amputated and thereby receiving global recognition.
Life is about perspective; how you see it is how it will reflect on you. Life itself is a mirror; it depends on the lens you are using to view it. If you believe that life happens to you, you will be the beggar in that situation. But if you know that you happen to life, you will be bigger instead of being a beggar. So, wake up every day and don’t gauge how you feel that day. Instead, tell yourself how you want to feel on any given day. Be the driver of your life, not a passenger.
In conclusion, when you have done what you are supposed to, and life still doesn’t turn out as expected, instead of feeling frustrated, try looking at it from the angle of disguised blessings by learning the inherent lessons the said situation is bringing to your table of life.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your and Unleash Your Destiny . He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
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Adding Value
Adding Value: The Faith to Succeed by Henry Ukazu
Published
1 week agoon
May 3, 2025By
Eric
Dear Destiny Friends,
We all need faith to succeed. Whether a student, entrepreneur, politician, leader, clergy or even woman in desperate need of a child; without faith, success will be difficult.
Faith is a strong component of life. Faith can be described as the invisible energy one cannot see but feels. For one to truly succeed, one must have faith in himself and business. If this is in place, the path is therefore paved for the extra mile through attending events of interest whether paid or unpaid for, reading books, network strategically, and most importantly believing in his work and worth.
The sad reality about life is that sometimes we lose faith in ourselves, and in our work Sometimes, just because of criticisms whether direct or constructive, in some cases we believe we are not good enough or our work is not good enough.
There are many reasons why one can fail in life, and lack of faith is one of them. I strongly believe that if no one believes in you, you just have to believe in yourself, if no one loves you, love yourself, if no gives you an opportunity, give yourself an opportunity, if no one gives you a chair, bring your seat. I have also come to realize that one has to project the image they want the world to see them as. In doing this, there is the need to present and package visions with optimism as opposed to living a fake life.
When faith is well practised, it will definitely be tested; one’s desire, interest, passion and love will be tested. It’s just like a lady who professes love to her lover; she is bound to be loyal to the relationship, in good and bad times despite having admirers who are ready to splash the goodies of life on her. In the same vein, a married woman will have to prove her love to her husband when the man experiences a challenge in his finances.
The same theory is also applicable to men whether single or married, who are always in the business of messing with other ladies despite being committed in a relationship. The idea here is that one’s faith will be tested because at the end of the day, we shall all experience challenges in our businesses, friendship, relationship, marriage, and spiritual life.
The power of faith however, cannot be overemphasized. Barack Obama believed in himself when he contested to be the United States of America President. Many people doubted his ability to win, but he humbled them with his audacious victory. He even authored a book titled “The Audacity of Hope” and “Dreams from My Father”. A cursory look at the titles of the book will reveal that Obama had absolute faith in the future, and his faith was audacious. He also believed in the dreams of his late father which also speaks about his father’s faith as well as his.
I believe this might be the reason the tagged his presidential campaign “Hope”. Hope in the possibility of the future.
When you believe in your spouse, child, employees and friends, you give them imaginary strength to do wonders. I have experienced the blessings of having faith in oneself. When I was working on my first book, I had faith the book would leave a great impact in the lives of young adults and emerging entrepreneurs, in addition to opening doors for me, and as fate will have it, it turned out exactly the way I imagined.
I also have the firm belief that by the special grace of God, I will be celebrated like other great minds the world has known. How it will happen, when it will happen and where it will happen, that I cannot say, but I believe it will happen at the right time.
When the word faith is mentioned, its principle is universal. It is instructive to note that it is the name you call someone the person will answer. When you don’t believe in something, it won’t work for you. There is a story about a sick mother whose son was a doctor. The son gave the mother a pill, but she refused and insisted she needed an injection. The son told the mother that as an experienced physician, who had been treating different patients for years, he was sure of the prescription he was giving her. Still, the mother refused to take the pill and insisted she needed an injection.
According to her, she had seen him injecting other people, and they got well. After some pleading, the mother agreed to take the pill. Sadly, even after then, her condition didn’t improve. When the son realized what was going on, he decided to inject her with only water as a placebo. In two days, the mother’s health dramatically improved. This is an example of how the root cause of an illness may lie in the mind or belief, but more importantly the woman had faith in the injection more than the pill her son is giving her.
My late dad used to own a hospital with his siblings, and each time I visited the hospital, I heard music in the background. I wondered why music was played in such silent and melodic tones. I later understood that the music was a form of spiritual and faith-based healing method. When patients heard the spiritual healing music, it gave them hope of survival.
In conclusion, in whatever you are doing, or want to do, you need to ignite a proactive and pragmatic faith to succeed. While doing this, be aware that doubt, fear and distractions will show up along the way. When they do, just know that, your desire for success should always outweigh your fear for failure.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your and Unleash Your Destiny . He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
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Adding Value
Adding Value: Be Intentional in Seed Sowing by Henry Ukazu
Published
1 week agoon
May 3, 2025By
Eric
Greetings Destiny Friends,
Human beings plant seeds every second, minute, hour, week, month, year and decade. One may be wondering how this works. Did you know that every thought that runs through one’s mind is a seed? Did you know that every action one takes is classified as a seed? Did you know the work we engage in on a daily, weekly, monthly or yearly basis all relates to planting a seed? We plant these seeds knowingly or unknowingly, intentionally or unintentionally, directly or indirectly. These seeds grow in us without us knowing.
Consider this practical example on how seeds grow without one’s knowledge; have you ever imagined how a newborn baby grows? The child grows while in their sleep just like a normal being.
Did you know that as a student, parent, teacher, supervisor, leader or mentor you are planting something. It is an indisputable fact that whatever you plant is what you will reap. An intentional mind with a growth mindset should question what he or she is planting.
To understand that mindset, every informed mind should always ask what the best use of their time is. For instance, a Christian, who has reverence for God, would not like to offend Him. To know how intentional one can be when a crime is about to be committed, one should ask himself what Jesus Christ would do if He found Himself in the same situation.
If you want to do anything you must take a proactive step to sow the seed. If you don’t plant the seed, your crop won’t grow. As a student, if you don’t read, you won’t pass an examination. As a parent, if you don’t train your child very well, your child might derail from an acceptable path of civility. As a progressive being, if you don’t take intentional steps to develop your life spiritually, academically, vocationally, health wise, family, careerwise, financially, trust me you will pay dearly for it.
Planting that seed entails taking positive action to do the needful. In the journey of life, one must not wait for a perfect time to act. Yes, I agree that sometimes, one must prepare, however, in certain situations, one just must swim along and potentially hope the universe will align with them. If one waits for a perfect time to strike, the perfect time might not come. Life and experience have taught me a unique support principle which states that the universe has a way of conspiring with a determined being to bring his desire into realization.
Planting is like setting up a business or organization. It involves layers and strategies.
Let me share a practical example on how to plant a good seed. First, decide what kind of seed to plant. When that part is figured out, the next stage is planning. Isn’t it true that failing to prepare is preparing to fail. Clarity enables preparation. Clarity helps one to make clearer and informed decisions. Clarity helps one to say yes to the right things. Did you know the whole world steps apart for the man who knows where he’s going? So before decision is taken to plant, there is the need to get acts together otherwise disaster might be the end result.
The third step of planning is launch. When it comes to execution, it’s important to note that one don’t have to wait for a perfect time to execute. Just do what you have to do with what you have anywhere you are. One keynote to bear in mind when executing is the fact that flexibility is the key to resistance. This is simply because your plan will be tested, so when it doesn’t go as planned, please don’t be hard on yourself.
Michael V. Robert, an American futurist and conglomerate, coined a word, “actionaire”. The actionaire takes action. He doesn’t wait for the dust to settle. He acts and fixes the odds as he moves along.
The sad mistake some entrepreneurs experience is that most times, they want to have a perfect space before they execute, they want to have a perfect programme, structure and product devoid of mistakes.
They fail to realize that done is better than perfect when perfect is not done. If that is you, I will strongly advise you to take the leap of faith, and execute. You’ll appreciate the experience that came because of your failures.
The fourth stage of planning is adjustment. This means adjusting your plan. As you rightly know, sometimes, life will not give us what we desire, but it will surely give us what we deserve. It’s instructive to note that, in personal and professional development journeys, paths will evolve, and one must be flexible when the need becomes imperative, because flexibility is the key to resistance.
Adjusting your plans means learning from your mistakes, researching contemporary trends and knowing what’s applicable in your industrial line of business.
The final but not the least is networking with the right people and organizations. Human beings are the vessels of opportunities and resources. No matter how strong and talented one can be, nobody and I repeat, nobody can do it alone. You need a community of collaborators, strategic media partners, mentors, tribes and a team to effectively carry out any task. According to an African adage, if you want to go fast, go alone, but if you want to go far, go with a team.
It is important to note that the world needs visionary leaders, who can design or create products and services that will solve problems in society.
When you look around, you will see many problems the communities, and the world in general, are facing. If that is too much for you to decipher, look around you, you will see individuals who are experiencing challenges and frustrations in their personal and professional lives, you can counsel, mentor, and assist them in developing their business depending on their needs. All these are examples of planting seeds in the minds of people.
Furthermore, planting of seeds does not only apply to crops, taking positive action and developing a business, among others. It also means laying a foundation for the kind of life one wants to live. In this context, one will have to plant the seed of love, kindness, patience, understanding, gratitude, appreciation, proactiveness, etc.
In conclusion, what seed would you like to plant in your business, family, employees, mentees, personal and professional life? When you figure it out, take a proactive step to plant it and nurture it to the fullest.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your and Unleash Your Destiny . He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
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