Adding Value
Adding Value: Dealing with Defective Success by Henry Ukazu
Published
11 months agoon
By
Eric
Dear Destiny Friends,
According to Mark Twain, “the two most important days in your Life is the day you were born and the day you found out why.” Why is this important? One of the best questions any rational and progressive mind must endeavor to answer before he leaves this sinful world is discovering the purpose of his existence. Whether one is in the academic space, relationship/marriage, entertainment, sports, business, political or otherwise, they must understand the basics and foundations, otherwise they might be just leaning on the wrong ladder of success.
In understanding defective success, let’s use a practical case of someone who is successful in his career, but failed in managing his family due to focusing more time on his career. Also, let’s see a case of an entrepreneur who was busy chasing contracts and money at the detriment of his sleep, and when he finally gets the money, his health has deteriorated.
Also, imagine a student who is wired to study Political Science or Philosophy in college, but somehow found himself studying Law due to the advice and influence of mentors or counselors, who felt he could do well in that area. The student might do well as a lawyer, but the question remains if he would be fulfilled as a man?
Furthermore, a lady might want to marry a man just because he has access to money as opposed to the values the man represents. The lady might end up having the man, but lacking the most important part of marital life, which is peace of mind and fulfilment.
The list is literally endless, but the moral of the question is, someone might get to the peak of his career, have access to money and the good things of life, but still misses a fundamental aspect of life-fulfilment.
What therefore, is defective success? Defective success is achieving a goal or assignment you are not sent for, or leaning on the wrong side of the wall. Not how far you have come, but how far you should have gone.
Defective success is simply leaning on the wrong ladder of success. Imagine leaning on the wrong ladder to climb up a position and when you get to your destination, you now discover you were leaning on the wrong ladder, which literally means, though you reached the peak, however, the gains and blessings would have been much higher if that’s the purpose you have been destined to do. What most people fail to understand is that one can be successful at something they are not called to do, and that’s defective success.
But how does defective success works? There is a story told by one of my mentors, Sir Fela Durutoye, a leadership expert, on how an Executive Director of a bank fell victim to defective success. According to him, this man participated in one of his training sessions and after the training, the man told him he had made him lose his job. Mr. Fela asked, how? He responded that after listening to him, he discovered he was meant to be a leadership consultant as opposed to a bank executive. The interesting thing about this bank executive was that, when he approached the bank to inform them of his desire to resign and become a leadership consultant, not only did his bank hire him to train their staff, but they also paid him twice his salary as Executive Director in the bank. The moral of this story is that, when you are doing what you are supposed to, the universe will locate you. Again, when you are working on purpose, your reward will be priceless.
Just to illustrate this point. Sometimes, hardship can make one relocate to another country for greener pastures, thinking that’s the best thing to do, however, only to find out, his purpose was not that in that country. The person might be living, but the impact he’s supposed to make in the world will not be manifested in the lives of people he was called to serve. Moral: May we not lose the impact we are created for just because of comfort or temporary setback.
Most people don’t understand how defective success works. They just think when they have made money, have influence and more, they have arrived, however, they fail to understand that in life, there’s more to money.
As you crave for success, you must train your mind and body to have the right value system, the right mindset, the right belief system, and your aspiration and goals must be the one you set for yourself and not the one anyone sets for you.
Do you know your success is tied to the reason you are created? Success can also be tied to the resources you are given. This is because you can’t separate success from purpose.
Let me elaborate, your purpose was made in Heaven and your assignment is to fulfil the assignment on earth. So, it is the one who sends you on an assignment that will determine the rubric of the success. If in your calculated wisdom, you have attained success, but your success is not in line with the definition of success by your mentor or manager, that’s defective success.
The question now becomes how does one avoid being a victim of defective success? The first step is to live a life of purpose.
Myles Munroe, an evangelist, was right when he stated, “when the purpose of a thing is not known, abuse is inevitable’. Every person was created for a reason. We are all wired in a certain way to accomplish a particular purpose.
Do you know at the end of life, we will give account of all we have been given at creation. Now imagine, if you are giving your report and you derail from the purpose, assignment, and problem you have been commissioned with the resources you were given at creation.
To avoid the pains of defective success, here are three things you should focus on. 1. One must focus on working and building on their talent. You are expected to use your talent to fulfil your divine purpose. 2. Your personality: This is what gives you comfort in the place of your purpose. When your purpose is in alignment with your talent, you won’t experience stress, rather you will experience a little stretch. Third and most important passion: Passion is inbuilt, when you are passionate about a cause, your pain, detractors, and challenges will serve as inspiration and distractions because you have a burning desire to accomplish something that is built in you which you are created to do. But when you are not working on purpose, you won’t experience strength, peace of mind and fulfilment.
Let me share a little bit of personal experience with you. Despite studying Taxation Law in New York Law School, I wasn’t passionate about the major. I remember when I was offered a decent salary by the New York City Department of Finance to begin my career as a Tax Specialist, I didn’t take the offer because I wasn’t passionate about the industry. I ended up settling for a Case Manager position, which offered me half of the pay I got for taxation.
The interesting thing was that I got joy, fulfilment, and most importantly, it aligned with my passion for service for humanity. Moral: When you are working on purpose, you’ll control money as opposed to being a slave to money. When you are passionate about a cause, you will be equipped with the talent to solve any challenge that may arise.
It’s instructive to note that when passion finds assignment, fulfillment is met, but when passion is lacking, it can lead to frustration. Be advised, even when you are working on purpose and a cause you are passionate about, you are bound to experience some level of frustration, but this frustration might not be the same as when you are doing what you are not created to do, rather it will serve as an alarm clock saying, what you are doing is not what you are created to do. Every time you are working on defective success, you won’t get fulfillment and a little distraction can lead to frustration.
When you are working on purpose and you experience frustration, you’ll have a certain level of peace despite the pain because somehow, you are working on purpose.
It’s sad to note that many people are not working where they are supposed to work, while some are working on a job they are not supposed to work.
Question: How do I find my purpose to avoid defective success?
If purpose is the reason for your existence, your best bet is to ask the manufacturer if you have the manual of any product. This is because you are not an accident. You are created and equipped on purpose to solve a problem. Your purpose was made in heaven and it’s eternal, but your assignment is time bound which must be fulfilled on earth.
For instance, your purpose cannot be changed, but your assignment varies. For instance, your purpose of going to school from primary school to university never changes, because it’s centered on acquiring education, but your assignment may change because your assignment at each stage from primary one to university will change as your progress.
Again, when your assignment changes, it’s still working on the grand scheme of things. This is why when you experience challenges, it’s part of the trials and dynamics to position and strengthen you to the place you are supposed to be. Moral: Don’t get distracted. Stay focused.
Connect with your purpose by finding your assignment. Anytime you follow the voice of the one who sent you, he will lead you to the next assignment.
When you are working on purpose, everything you need to succeed will be given to you at your place of assignment by the creator and manufacturer. Therefore, you must connect with your purpose to fulfil your purpose. According to Fela Durutoye, the future is everything you can be, but you are yet to become, the future is everything you can possess or achieve but you are yet to achieve or possess it. Your task is to deliver the future, but that will only come when you are working on purpose.
In conclusion, you must give your time, energy, money and resources to do what you are created to do. You were given everything from eternity to ensure you succeed, but you will only succeed when you are living or working on purpose.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your and Unleash Your Destiny . He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
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Adding Value
Adding Value: Remember and Acknowledge Your Source by Henry Ukazu
Published
5 days agoon
March 22, 2025By
Eric
Greetings Destiny Friends,
There’s always the urge to get certain things done as a living person. Most times, the urge transcends to impatience and desperation as the thirst for fame, power, wealth and success increases. This happens to the extent that the average human being either forgets or fails to take into consideration the process and most importantly, the foundation or origin of their inspiration.
It is worth noting that before anyone decides to go on a journey, several factors play a role; before anyone decides to study a course in college, he must have a sponsor assuming they don’t have the personal financial muscle; before anyone becomes a millionaire or billionaire, there’s always someone responsible for the opportunity; before one becomes a Chief Executive Officer of a company, he must have climbed through the ropes from internship either in the said company or another, and it’s also instructive to note that someone gave him the opportunity to showcase his charismatic work skills; before anyone decides to go into politics, different people play roles either in form of mentors or citizens. There’s always a significant source in the making of a the person. The list is endless.
Why is it necessary to highlight these significant points? The answer is quite simple; nobody achieves greatness on his or her own. Nobody is self made no matter what one may claim. Even God in his infinite knowledge used Virgin Mary to birth Jesus Christ. So, if the saviour of mankind can come in the form of man, why should anyone think he is self made?
It’s sad to see certain people think they have arrived either because they now have money, power, influence or attained a certain height. They begin to act like demi-gods, and sometimes, play God in the affairs of men. They fail to remember they were once nobody, and had nothing.
It’s always good for one to remember their source, and this is very important. Sometimes, when we see people doing great and big things in the world, we wonder what their secret or source is. While some people will be bold to acknowledge their source, others might be a little bit hesitant and decide to keep it as their best kept secret, especially when it involves trade and merchandise.
To know the secret of anyone, look at their lifestyle, some people attribute it to God, some to mentors, mentees, good food, exercise, academics, rest, parents or spiritual leaders. For me, I am unapologetic to state three things responsible for who I am today; the first is God. We live in a society where some people find it hard to acknowledge God publicly for reasons best known to them. I truly know I am not the smartest, strongest or most intelligent, but I can authoritatively tell you, I have seen and experienced the hand of God upon my life.
Another great source of mine is my late parents comprising my late grandmother, my late father and my late mother. They all played significant roles in my life with their prayers and blessings. I can say with all boldness, they are my biggest inspiration and reason I do what I do today. It’s sad to see young men and women who fail to recognize and appreciate their parents because they are either old, not academically exposed or for whatever reason best known to them. Well, I won’t judge anyone, but I do know that the earlier one receives the sense to appreciate their parents, no matter their shortcomings, the better the positive influence it would have in their lives.
Finally, my third major source of strength is the people I work with, especially my immediate team. Like I always say; I’m not just smart, I am only smart by association. I have a team of ingenious minds, who I am very loyal and committed to in any way I can. What attracts me to them is their mindset, attitude and most importantly their talent/gift. If I may add a fourth category, I will say my mentors, there are certain people I look up to based on their position, accomplishment, personality. I call this set of mentors my pinnacle mentors because of who they are, or what they represent. If you would like to know the role of mentors in my life, please read one of my most insightful articles Mentors Are Life Savers.
Let’s get this clear, anyone can be a source. It might not really be a man of substance. Your mentee, child, partner or employee can be your source. What’s important is for one to recognize their role. Like I stated earlier, my team who I work with are my third greatest source, and I strongly believe God is using them to lift me up.
One may be wondering why I took my time to address these salient points. The reason is not farfetched. It’s regrettable to see people who have attained certain heights, and they seem to forget their roots. Some even forget their source. Like accomplished journalist, Dr. Dele Momodu, would always quote his late ‘unlettered mother’, who admonished him to “never forget the son of who you are”. That’s a very deep statement.
Acknowledging one’s source is very critical to one’s growth. It speaks volumes about one’s mindset and personality. Let’s take a case study where someone assisted you to become great, and ends up insulting or using sarcastic words on you. They may even be uncharitable to you. I get all these narratives, still acknowledge them.
Acknowledging one’s source can be ambiguous. As Christians, sometimes we pray to our creator, give up our daily bread. By doing so, we are remembering our source, but quite often sometimes when we eat this bread and become well fed, we tend to forget from whom it came, and in some cases, fail to give credit to whom it is due. This is the attitude of ungrateful minds.
I will conclude with a prayer thus; in our quest for greatness and search the material things of the world, may we not forget our source, who gave us opportunities when we were nothing. Can I hear you say amen!
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your and Unleash Your Destiny . He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
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Adding Value
Adding Value: Continue to Grind by Henry Ukazu
Published
2 weeks agoon
March 15, 2025By
Eric
Dear Destiny Friends,
When one grinds, he is practically working or studying very hard, often in a repetitive way for a better future outcome. It can also be the act of hustling or striving for success, according to internet overview. This principle explains the phrase, ‘rise and grind’, which encourages individuals to wake up and work hard to achieve goals.
Having said that, please permit me to be a bit personal about my next exposition. It’s for an instructive reason.
As a Christian, and practicing catholic, I’m trained on the mysteries of the Holy Rosary. In one of the mysteries – Sorrowful mysteries, we have five other mysteries namely: The Agony in the garden, scourging at the pillar, crowning with thorns, carrying of the cross and death and crucifixion of Jesus Christ.
One may be wondering what the symbolic and relative nature of the above mysteries are. Well, the answer is quite clear; the mysteries of the sorrow mysteries symbolize the difficult terrain Jesus Christ must go through for the salvation of mankind. As a Christian, each time I meditate on the sad experience of Jesus Christ for the salvation of mankind, it makes me rethink about life, especially whenever I am tempted to sin against God.
As human beings, we also experience the same trajectory in our effort to succeed, and this entails the act of ‘grinding’. Life never promises to be easy, and it will never be easy. As a matter of fact, the higher one goes, the tougher the hurdle.
It is an undisputable fact that nothing good comes easy. Whether you have an interest in running a business, raising a decent family, earning a degree, or improving on your personal development, one must grind, and this entails exploring all legitimate means. Sometimes, life does not give you what you want, but it will surely give you what you deserve.
So, when you grind, and life doesn’t give you what you desire, don’t give up, continue to grind. The mistake most people make is giving up quite early when the odds seem to be against you. Sometimes, when you don’t get what you want, there might be several reasons. It might be a case of one not being prepared or competent for such a position. It can also be a case where the universe has something different for you which one might not see in the immediate sense.
Again, when one doesn’t get what they desire, it is not because they don’t have the capacity, or competency, it might be a case of the timing not being right. On a personal note, I have applied for job opportunities and was rejected; I have tried to meet with resourceful people, but access was denied; I have written hundreds of articles, but only a few went viral. The stories are many, but one thing is certain; I learnt a lot from those experiences.
In your grinding, you might think nobody is watching or noticing your efforts, trust me, your efforts and work are seen. In due time, the work will be rewarded. I can testify to this statement because over time, I have been in the wilderness tilling the ground to make an impact. I am surprised to get award nominations in addition to being an award recipient on several occasions.
In some other cases, I get recommendations on the streets from people who see my work. One of the major challenges may be having the right person to spot your work. One may be wondering how it works. Let’s take the case of a man, who is trying to woo a lady. The lady in question knows what she wants in a man or the qualities and values. So, when you approach a lady, and she says no, what a rational mind will do is to explore other options that appear to be beneficial to both parties, and who knows in the long run, she might give consent.
Grinding can mean a thousand and one things depending on which aisle one is resting on. According to a notable ghost writer, Dr. Yomi Garnett, “The best pictures of you are yet to be taken. The best stories about you are yet to be told. The best of your years still lies ahead. So, affirm to yourself today: The good days are here, but the best is yet to come.”
So, while waiting for the best pictures, stories, and years ahead, continue to put in the work of learning, exploring opportunities, having faith in the creator and universe, and continue to grind. By so doing, the right opportunities will be attracted to you when the timing and the universe feel it’s for you.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your and Unleash Your Destiny . He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
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Adding Value: The Principles of Seed Time and Harvest Time by Henry Ukazu
Published
3 weeks agoon
March 7, 2025By
Eric
Dear Destiny Friends,
The importance of timing cannot be overemphasized. Timing is everything in life. It is critical to one’s success. You can lose your money and get it back in many folds. You can even lose your health and get it back all things being equal, but when you lose time, you can hardly get it back again.
The importance of timing can be seen in crops. Every crop has a season, a good farmer won’t plant maize when it’s time for oranges, nor will he plant pears when it’s the season for mangoes.
Time is very instrumental to the success and failure of anyone. Imagine having a meeting or interview at 9:00am and you arrive at 10:10am, it will take the grace of God to be interviewed. As an employee, apart from one not being able to diligently do his job, one of the fastest ways for an employee to lose his job is by being late to work.
When I was in New York Law School studying Taxation law, I did a course titled, the Problem of Timing. During the semester, I learnt about cash and accrued income. Let me do some academic exercise here. In cash income, just like the name entails, one is paid in cash as soon as the work is completed. It’s just like going to the market to make a purchase. One can either pay directly with cash or with debit or credit card. But Accrued income refers to revenue a company has earned by providing goods or services, but for which payment has not yet been received, one will have to do the work first before getting paid. This is applicable when one works in either a public or private organization where one is paid either weekly, bi-weekly or at the end of the month depending on the stipulated mode of payment.
It’s important to note that before the money is paid either in cash or accrued, one would have earned it. It’s just like one learning g before earning, and one will have to update to upgrade. These are just the practical principles that will work with life.
In the same way, in life there’s a seed time and harvest time. It’s a universal principle of life. Whether as a parent, entrepreneur, student or employee. As a parent, if you don’t train your kids very well, they will grow up to reflect the opposite of what you desire. As an entrepreneur when you invest in your business, you will get the reward in due time. As a student, if you take your studies seriously, your grades will improve, and as an employee, you stand to get promotions and opportunities when you add value to your work. In summary, one will have to put in the work before recognition comes on.
To understand how seedtime and harvest work, imagine where parents tend to like one child more than others just because they see potential in him, or he’s smart, hardworking or even creative. They fail to understand that every child is different and as such their timing can be different. Some kinds take time to develop.
I personally believe there’s something so unique about each individual which God has deposited in everyone of us. It’s just a matter of time for it to manifest. Your timing of manifestation is different from your siblings and colleagues.
Personally, I didn’t mature fast with my contemporaries. Overtime, I have seen much improvement in my personal and professional life. Maybe because I have added value to my work with the assistance of mentors and good friends, or God had to humble my colleagues and mentors . Why do I say this? During my formative years, I had little or nothing to show for it. I was looking at my contemporaries as mentor and seeing my mentors as small gods whose feat is unattainable, but now, the reverse seems to be case as I have developed capacity some of my colleagues are yet to attain, while I have even surpassed the achievement of my some of my mentors in some quarters.
In all these, they are all surprised how it happened. Some are yet to comprehend or articulate the feat. It’s just like watching a film where everyone slept and woke up to see the game and tides have changed. The secret behind it is the seed time and harvest time. I was probably learning the trade while in the wilderness, and when the training season matured and ripe enough to be harvested, I became attractive to almost everyone who loved the seed I was producing.
There are litany of examples of people, who have been in the wilderness during the seed planting season. Let’s take a case study of Joseph in the Bible, his journey to stardom took a little twist. Despite the travails he experienced in the hands of his siblings who sold him, his experience while in the jail, and with Portiphar’s wife, who tried to seduce him; they were all set ups for success. The moral here is Joseph seed time and harvest time was quite different, it wasn’t a smooth journey. Ordinarily, one would have cursed his siblings or his friends who were with him in prison and forgot him after they were released. But at the end of time, everything worked out for his favor. Joseph’s seed days were his dark days while in the wilderness.
Another inspiring story of note was that of Pastor Ibukun Awosika, the former board Chairman of First Bank of Nigeria. She once shared a pathetic story during her formative years of being in business. According to her, she sojourned for about 15 years. She cried because lines were not adding up for her and she wouldn’t do what her contemporaries were doing to get opportunities. At a point in her business, it appeared like she was in a race of own life because everything seemed to be against her, but at the appropriate time, lines began to fall in place for her. Appointments, business opportunities, favours and goodwill began to fall in place for her. Again, she had a fair share of seed time.
An interesting question I would like to ask you is, what’s your seed time? Have you ever been in the wilderness when you appeared to be fixed? It’s unfortunate many people are not willing to pass through the storms or experience seeds and harvest time. Amidst all these, one must do some work before they get opportunities. However, before such opportunities will come up, one will have to plant the seed.
In conclusion, seed time and harvest time is critical in the journey of life. Take a seat and determine what seed you would like to sow and what you’ll like to harvest.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your and Unleash Your Destiny . He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
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