Adding Value
Adding Value: What Do You Want? By Henry Ukazu
Published
4 years agoon
By
Eric
Dear Destiny friends,
“If you could say in one word what you want more of in life, what would that be?”
As human beings, we have so many demands, needs, dreams, aspirations, goals, ambitions, visions, and desires. All these thoughts are constantly in our minds. However, one of the nutty issues we battle daily as rational beings is the ability to differentiate between our needs and our wants. Sometimes, we concentrate our energy on our wants instead of our needs; don’t get me wrong, focusing your energy on your wants is not a bad idea, but we should be able to balance our life by spending quality time working on what will add value to our life.
It’s instructive to note that the world doesn’t care about your weakness, rather they appreciate your strength. That’s why you ought to major in your strength and work on your weakness.
If you are asked, what do you want? Depending on the stage and interest you have in life, your answer may vary. As a young lady who is due for marriage, you might say, husband, if married, you might say a child. As a student, married man, businessman, politician, athlete, actor, etc., your answer will definitely be different. For example, in a relationship, many couples experience challenges that are not limited to money, communication, conflicts, sex, expectations, and personalities in marriage. All these factors play a role in meeting their expectations, especially when conflicts arise.
As a professional you may want may be to write a book, start a new business, travel abroad, attain a second or third degree in an IVY league school, attain financial freedom, etc. To some other person who is not literally attracted to material things, the desires and wants might be happiness, peace, joy, freedom, fulfillment, etc. To another, their desire might be how to have self-confidence, being able to make decisions and execute as opposed to having a biased mind. The list is literally inexhaustible.
Furthermore, to know what truly matters to you, if you are asked, what is the one thing you will do, and you know you won’t fail, what will be your response?
As a self-discovery coach, I discover that one of the challenges most people have is how to discover their purpose. When you discover your purpose, you will be able to decipher what you want. As a self-discovery coach, I help people to discover their purpose and what’s unique about them by assisting them to make the right choice, turning their failures into their friends for them to unleash their potentials.
Almost on a daily basis, I see many people struggling with this question, who am I? It should be noted; self-discovery is one of the hardest things in life. The moment you discover what’s unique about you and your purpose in life, you have answered one of the most difficult questions in life. As a matter of fact, the day you discover yourself, is the day you become a millionaire.
In the journey of life, we’ll continue to discover new things about our self because as human beings we evolve daily. According to Alvin Toffler, “The illiterate of the 21st century will not be those who cannot read and write, but those who cannot learn, unlearn, and relearn.” We live in a dynamic world, and a great way to survive is by adapting to the new realities.
Just like we have different taste buds, we also have different tastes in life, especially as it relates to the luxuries of life. For example, if you have an interest in cars that speed, you are more likely to get a Mercedes Benz, if you have an interest in a car with durability, you are better of with Toyota and Honda. It should be noted that both of these cars will give you comfort, they will take you to your desired destination, but they have specific functions which attracted you to them. Again, I ask you, what do you want?
The same analogy is applicable to a house. All houses are literally the same, the only difference is the space. If you have one-bedroom, two-bedrooms, three-bedrooms, five-bedrooms apartment, bungalow, duplex, etc., they are all decent houses, the only major difference here is your choice and the space they accumulate, otherwise, they’ll have the basic interiors a house is supposed to have like television, air-condition, chair, refrigerator, etc. You will even get the same level of comfort.
It’s quite unfortunate some people with poor mindsets think they are living a low life or even suffering because they don’t have larger rooms or space. Please change that mindset; you not suffering because you are living in a one-bedroom apartment neither are you living a low life because you are driving a particular brand of car. Life is a matter of choice. Some wealthy minds drive lower brands of cars while some average people drive luxury cars just to impress people. But the irony of life is that people who literally have money, don’t live to impress people, they just live their life and you can see they are very comfortable as opposed to average people who might struggle to live up to expectation. Again, what do you want?
Regardless of what your desires and dreams might be, I want to tell you that they are valid. You just have to tell yourself the honest truth about what works for you, not what others say to you. You know what you want. Your desires, expectations, and interest are unique to you. You don’t literally have to care for other people’s opinion, the best you can do is to give it a thought; if it aligns with your values and interest, then make the necessary adjustment.
The best way to make a decision is to look into your inner heart and ask yourself if you have inner peace, and to know if you have inner peace, you will be fulfilled in your heart.
In conclusion. I charge you today to critically evaluate your interest, values, passion, vision, and most importantly what will be the greatest impact in your life at any point in time, and then decide what you want.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He’s a mindset coach and public speaker. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the author of the acclaimed book Design Your Destiny – Actualizing Your Birthright To Success and President of gloemi.com. He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
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Adding Value
Adding Value: Remember and Acknowledge Your Source by Henry Ukazu
Published
4 days agoon
March 22, 2025By
Eric
Greetings Destiny Friends,
There’s always the urge to get certain things done as a living person. Most times, the urge transcends to impatience and desperation as the thirst for fame, power, wealth and success increases. This happens to the extent that the average human being either forgets or fails to take into consideration the process and most importantly, the foundation or origin of their inspiration.
It is worth noting that before anyone decides to go on a journey, several factors play a role; before anyone decides to study a course in college, he must have a sponsor assuming they don’t have the personal financial muscle; before anyone becomes a millionaire or billionaire, there’s always someone responsible for the opportunity; before one becomes a Chief Executive Officer of a company, he must have climbed through the ropes from internship either in the said company or another, and it’s also instructive to note that someone gave him the opportunity to showcase his charismatic work skills; before anyone decides to go into politics, different people play roles either in form of mentors or citizens. There’s always a significant source in the making of a the person. The list is endless.
Why is it necessary to highlight these significant points? The answer is quite simple; nobody achieves greatness on his or her own. Nobody is self made no matter what one may claim. Even God in his infinite knowledge used Virgin Mary to birth Jesus Christ. So, if the saviour of mankind can come in the form of man, why should anyone think he is self made?
It’s sad to see certain people think they have arrived either because they now have money, power, influence or attained a certain height. They begin to act like demi-gods, and sometimes, play God in the affairs of men. They fail to remember they were once nobody, and had nothing.
It’s always good for one to remember their source, and this is very important. Sometimes, when we see people doing great and big things in the world, we wonder what their secret or source is. While some people will be bold to acknowledge their source, others might be a little bit hesitant and decide to keep it as their best kept secret, especially when it involves trade and merchandise.
To know the secret of anyone, look at their lifestyle, some people attribute it to God, some to mentors, mentees, good food, exercise, academics, rest, parents or spiritual leaders. For me, I am unapologetic to state three things responsible for who I am today; the first is God. We live in a society where some people find it hard to acknowledge God publicly for reasons best known to them. I truly know I am not the smartest, strongest or most intelligent, but I can authoritatively tell you, I have seen and experienced the hand of God upon my life.
Another great source of mine is my late parents comprising my late grandmother, my late father and my late mother. They all played significant roles in my life with their prayers and blessings. I can say with all boldness, they are my biggest inspiration and reason I do what I do today. It’s sad to see young men and women who fail to recognize and appreciate their parents because they are either old, not academically exposed or for whatever reason best known to them. Well, I won’t judge anyone, but I do know that the earlier one receives the sense to appreciate their parents, no matter their shortcomings, the better the positive influence it would have in their lives.
Finally, my third major source of strength is the people I work with, especially my immediate team. Like I always say; I’m not just smart, I am only smart by association. I have a team of ingenious minds, who I am very loyal and committed to in any way I can. What attracts me to them is their mindset, attitude and most importantly their talent/gift. If I may add a fourth category, I will say my mentors, there are certain people I look up to based on their position, accomplishment, personality. I call this set of mentors my pinnacle mentors because of who they are, or what they represent. If you would like to know the role of mentors in my life, please read one of my most insightful articles Mentors Are Life Savers.
Let’s get this clear, anyone can be a source. It might not really be a man of substance. Your mentee, child, partner or employee can be your source. What’s important is for one to recognize their role. Like I stated earlier, my team who I work with are my third greatest source, and I strongly believe God is using them to lift me up.
One may be wondering why I took my time to address these salient points. The reason is not farfetched. It’s regrettable to see people who have attained certain heights, and they seem to forget their roots. Some even forget their source. Like accomplished journalist, Dr. Dele Momodu, would always quote his late ‘unlettered mother’, who admonished him to “never forget the son of who you are”. That’s a very deep statement.
Acknowledging one’s source is very critical to one’s growth. It speaks volumes about one’s mindset and personality. Let’s take a case study where someone assisted you to become great, and ends up insulting or using sarcastic words on you. They may even be uncharitable to you. I get all these narratives, still acknowledge them.
Acknowledging one’s source can be ambiguous. As Christians, sometimes we pray to our creator, give up our daily bread. By doing so, we are remembering our source, but quite often sometimes when we eat this bread and become well fed, we tend to forget from whom it came, and in some cases, fail to give credit to whom it is due. This is the attitude of ungrateful minds.
I will conclude with a prayer thus; in our quest for greatness and search the material things of the world, may we not forget our source, who gave us opportunities when we were nothing. Can I hear you say amen!
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your and Unleash Your Destiny . He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
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Adding Value
Adding Value: Continue to Grind by Henry Ukazu
Published
2 weeks agoon
March 15, 2025By
Eric
Dear Destiny Friends,
When one grinds, he is practically working or studying very hard, often in a repetitive way for a better future outcome. It can also be the act of hustling or striving for success, according to internet overview. This principle explains the phrase, ‘rise and grind’, which encourages individuals to wake up and work hard to achieve goals.
Having said that, please permit me to be a bit personal about my next exposition. It’s for an instructive reason.
As a Christian, and practicing catholic, I’m trained on the mysteries of the Holy Rosary. In one of the mysteries – Sorrowful mysteries, we have five other mysteries namely: The Agony in the garden, scourging at the pillar, crowning with thorns, carrying of the cross and death and crucifixion of Jesus Christ.
One may be wondering what the symbolic and relative nature of the above mysteries are. Well, the answer is quite clear; the mysteries of the sorrow mysteries symbolize the difficult terrain Jesus Christ must go through for the salvation of mankind. As a Christian, each time I meditate on the sad experience of Jesus Christ for the salvation of mankind, it makes me rethink about life, especially whenever I am tempted to sin against God.
As human beings, we also experience the same trajectory in our effort to succeed, and this entails the act of ‘grinding’. Life never promises to be easy, and it will never be easy. As a matter of fact, the higher one goes, the tougher the hurdle.
It is an undisputable fact that nothing good comes easy. Whether you have an interest in running a business, raising a decent family, earning a degree, or improving on your personal development, one must grind, and this entails exploring all legitimate means. Sometimes, life does not give you what you want, but it will surely give you what you deserve.
So, when you grind, and life doesn’t give you what you desire, don’t give up, continue to grind. The mistake most people make is giving up quite early when the odds seem to be against you. Sometimes, when you don’t get what you want, there might be several reasons. It might be a case of one not being prepared or competent for such a position. It can also be a case where the universe has something different for you which one might not see in the immediate sense.
Again, when one doesn’t get what they desire, it is not because they don’t have the capacity, or competency, it might be a case of the timing not being right. On a personal note, I have applied for job opportunities and was rejected; I have tried to meet with resourceful people, but access was denied; I have written hundreds of articles, but only a few went viral. The stories are many, but one thing is certain; I learnt a lot from those experiences.
In your grinding, you might think nobody is watching or noticing your efforts, trust me, your efforts and work are seen. In due time, the work will be rewarded. I can testify to this statement because over time, I have been in the wilderness tilling the ground to make an impact. I am surprised to get award nominations in addition to being an award recipient on several occasions.
In some other cases, I get recommendations on the streets from people who see my work. One of the major challenges may be having the right person to spot your work. One may be wondering how it works. Let’s take the case of a man, who is trying to woo a lady. The lady in question knows what she wants in a man or the qualities and values. So, when you approach a lady, and she says no, what a rational mind will do is to explore other options that appear to be beneficial to both parties, and who knows in the long run, she might give consent.
Grinding can mean a thousand and one things depending on which aisle one is resting on. According to a notable ghost writer, Dr. Yomi Garnett, “The best pictures of you are yet to be taken. The best stories about you are yet to be told. The best of your years still lies ahead. So, affirm to yourself today: The good days are here, but the best is yet to come.”
So, while waiting for the best pictures, stories, and years ahead, continue to put in the work of learning, exploring opportunities, having faith in the creator and universe, and continue to grind. By so doing, the right opportunities will be attracted to you when the timing and the universe feel it’s for you.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your and Unleash Your Destiny . He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
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Adding Value
Adding Value: The Principles of Seed Time and Harvest Time by Henry Ukazu
Published
3 weeks agoon
March 7, 2025By
Eric
Dear Destiny Friends,
The importance of timing cannot be overemphasized. Timing is everything in life. It is critical to one’s success. You can lose your money and get it back in many folds. You can even lose your health and get it back all things being equal, but when you lose time, you can hardly get it back again.
The importance of timing can be seen in crops. Every crop has a season, a good farmer won’t plant maize when it’s time for oranges, nor will he plant pears when it’s the season for mangoes.
Time is very instrumental to the success and failure of anyone. Imagine having a meeting or interview at 9:00am and you arrive at 10:10am, it will take the grace of God to be interviewed. As an employee, apart from one not being able to diligently do his job, one of the fastest ways for an employee to lose his job is by being late to work.
When I was in New York Law School studying Taxation law, I did a course titled, the Problem of Timing. During the semester, I learnt about cash and accrued income. Let me do some academic exercise here. In cash income, just like the name entails, one is paid in cash as soon as the work is completed. It’s just like going to the market to make a purchase. One can either pay directly with cash or with debit or credit card. But Accrued income refers to revenue a company has earned by providing goods or services, but for which payment has not yet been received, one will have to do the work first before getting paid. This is applicable when one works in either a public or private organization where one is paid either weekly, bi-weekly or at the end of the month depending on the stipulated mode of payment.
It’s important to note that before the money is paid either in cash or accrued, one would have earned it. It’s just like one learning g before earning, and one will have to update to upgrade. These are just the practical principles that will work with life.
In the same way, in life there’s a seed time and harvest time. It’s a universal principle of life. Whether as a parent, entrepreneur, student or employee. As a parent, if you don’t train your kids very well, they will grow up to reflect the opposite of what you desire. As an entrepreneur when you invest in your business, you will get the reward in due time. As a student, if you take your studies seriously, your grades will improve, and as an employee, you stand to get promotions and opportunities when you add value to your work. In summary, one will have to put in the work before recognition comes on.
To understand how seedtime and harvest work, imagine where parents tend to like one child more than others just because they see potential in him, or he’s smart, hardworking or even creative. They fail to understand that every child is different and as such their timing can be different. Some kinds take time to develop.
I personally believe there’s something so unique about each individual which God has deposited in everyone of us. It’s just a matter of time for it to manifest. Your timing of manifestation is different from your siblings and colleagues.
Personally, I didn’t mature fast with my contemporaries. Overtime, I have seen much improvement in my personal and professional life. Maybe because I have added value to my work with the assistance of mentors and good friends, or God had to humble my colleagues and mentors . Why do I say this? During my formative years, I had little or nothing to show for it. I was looking at my contemporaries as mentor and seeing my mentors as small gods whose feat is unattainable, but now, the reverse seems to be case as I have developed capacity some of my colleagues are yet to attain, while I have even surpassed the achievement of my some of my mentors in some quarters.
In all these, they are all surprised how it happened. Some are yet to comprehend or articulate the feat. It’s just like watching a film where everyone slept and woke up to see the game and tides have changed. The secret behind it is the seed time and harvest time. I was probably learning the trade while in the wilderness, and when the training season matured and ripe enough to be harvested, I became attractive to almost everyone who loved the seed I was producing.
There are litany of examples of people, who have been in the wilderness during the seed planting season. Let’s take a case study of Joseph in the Bible, his journey to stardom took a little twist. Despite the travails he experienced in the hands of his siblings who sold him, his experience while in the jail, and with Portiphar’s wife, who tried to seduce him; they were all set ups for success. The moral here is Joseph seed time and harvest time was quite different, it wasn’t a smooth journey. Ordinarily, one would have cursed his siblings or his friends who were with him in prison and forgot him after they were released. But at the end of time, everything worked out for his favor. Joseph’s seed days were his dark days while in the wilderness.
Another inspiring story of note was that of Pastor Ibukun Awosika, the former board Chairman of First Bank of Nigeria. She once shared a pathetic story during her formative years of being in business. According to her, she sojourned for about 15 years. She cried because lines were not adding up for her and she wouldn’t do what her contemporaries were doing to get opportunities. At a point in her business, it appeared like she was in a race of own life because everything seemed to be against her, but at the appropriate time, lines began to fall in place for her. Appointments, business opportunities, favours and goodwill began to fall in place for her. Again, she had a fair share of seed time.
An interesting question I would like to ask you is, what’s your seed time? Have you ever been in the wilderness when you appeared to be fixed? It’s unfortunate many people are not willing to pass through the storms or experience seeds and harvest time. Amidst all these, one must do some work before they get opportunities. However, before such opportunities will come up, one will have to plant the seed.
In conclusion, seed time and harvest time is critical in the journey of life. Take a seat and determine what seed you would like to sow and what you’ll like to harvest.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your and Unleash Your Destiny . He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
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