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Adding Value

Adding Value: Bless the World to Receive More Blessings by Henry Ukazu

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Dear Destiny Friends,

While in college, I learnt one of the best skills in human relationship, and that’s communication. When you know how to communicate with the right words, you will literally get whatever you want in life. This is a universal principle.

Let me explain a little; when you pray the right way by using the right words your request will be given attention by God. As a man, when you have the right words for a lady, she’ll easily be attracted to you, especially if word affirmation is her love language; as an entrepreneur, if you can articulate a good proposal, you stand a better chance of getting a grant or funding for your business. As a student, if you can use the right diction, you stand a better chance of passing your exams.

According to Les Brown, if you want to succeed, you must change your mindset, practice only quality people and develop your communication skills because when you open your mouth to speak, you tell the world who you are. This goes to tell you communication is one of the most important skills if not the most important skill one needs in our contemporary society. Your ability to write and speak clearly will set you apart from your contemporaries.

Why is human relationship very important? Human beings are the people who will bless you. If you don’t have a good personal and professional relationship with people, it will be difficult to get whatever you want. Social skills is a currency, if properly utilized, one can attract goodwill. If you will agree with me, the joy of life is not how happy you are, but how happy others can be because of you. When you touch people selflessly, they will be attracted to you.

To receive blessing from anyone, you must have value. This value might be a service, a product or even an attitude. In our contemporary society, many people complain of lack as the reason they haven’t been able to make an impact in the world. These ignorant minds think money, connections, academic qualifications etc are necessary factors to attract influence and money in the society, yes, they are part of the requirements, but not necessarily the main substance.

There are certain qualities and values one can have that’s more valuable and important than money. A typical example is attitude. No matter how smart, connected, rich and resourceful one might be, if you have a funny or nasty attitude, no serious-minded person would take you seriously. According to Maya Angelou, “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

Everyone is blessed with a skill, talent/gift, or has some form of certificate. Even if you don’t have any, you have common sense, wisdom, humility, kindness, gratitude, loyalty, or a heart of volunteerism. When you showcase these traits to the right people with a genuine heart, there’s a tendency to attract opportunity because people see those who participate.

When you bless the world with what you have, the world will in turn bless you with money and opportunities. It’s instructive to note that no gift, skill, or virtue is more important than the other. What’s important is knowing how to make use of it.

In the business world, one must know what works for anyone to attract an opportunity. Did you know your humility, kindness, words, volunteerism, and honesty can make someone invest in you?

Most times, some uniformed minds complain of being poor. However, they fail to understand that if one doesn’t have money, the reason is often because he is not solving a problem, or not solving enough problems, or not solving the right problem or not solving problems for the right people.

Generally, we make money because we have something unique to offer to the world. So again, I will ask you, what do you have in your hands or personality to offer the world?

The major reason most people fail in life is because they don’t really discover themselves. Self-discovery is a life-long career because you can never fully comprehend yourself. When you discover who you are, your gift, talent, skill, and the academic qualification you have been blessed with, you will be properly positioned to bless others.

It should be noted that you can’t bless others if you haven’t been able to bless yourself. To know if one is blessed, investigate your life to see if you have received any form of favour from people; this favour might not necessarily be money, it can be opportunity or appreciation.

When people invest in you, it’s simply because they have seen value in you. Someone made the way for you by giving you an opportunity, the best you can do is to pay it forward by being a blessing to another person. Did you know you are blessed to bless other people? When you develop your skills, talents and gifts, the world will in turn celebrate you.

When you are good in what you do, people can see through you, especially when you are consistent for a just cause. When you solve a problem with your value, people notice. Your greatest gift to the world is to make an impact with what you have.

According to Hans Urs Von Balthasar, what you are is God’s gift to you, what you become is your gift to God.

In conclusion, I will strongly admonish you to stop complaining and start practicing gratitude with what your have. Let me ask you; are you a good singer, dancer, artist, footballer, athlete, writer, speaker, etc.? If yes, horn and develop them to the best of your ability, and see if the world won’t celebrate you. Trust me, there are literally people waiting to pay you for the gifts you are giving the world for free if only you know how to pitch your ideas to the right people, organizations in addition to monetizing it. Remember, the day you discover your gift, that’s the day you become a millionaire.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate and creative writer Design Your Destiny and Unleash Your Destiny.  He can be reached via info@gloemi.com

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Adding Value

Adding Value: The Power of Transformation by Henry Ukazu

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Dear Destiny Friends,

Apart from having access to power, opportunities and being financially independent, nothing elevates a human being more than transformation.

Transformation occurs in different stages of life. Plants experience transformation by metamorphosis; animals experience transformation, human beings experience transformation; children, parents, students, leaders etc. all experience transformation from conception to death.

In the academic or professional environment, before anyone can be transformed, one must have added value to oneself which will enable him to serve and make an impact in the world. Transformation comes in various ways, one can transform by meeting someone, going to school, having a relationship with your creator, learning a skill and being in the political space.

In the journey of life, most people undergo multiple transformations throughout their lives. Although change can be uncomfortable, it can open new layers of life if one is properly transformed. Transformation is a powerful, valuable experience that’s capable of giving one what I call an encounter.

Do you know an encounter can lead to a transformation. Whenever you have an encounter, your life will change. An encounter can be meeting someone, attaining financial independence, getting a new job, or even accruing a formal education.

Let me share an example of how transformation works. Imagine a parent who saves hundreds of dollars   every week for his child until the child becomes of age, say 18 or 25 years and he decides to pay for college to buy a property for the child. Also, contrast the same scenario to when the father decides to give that child the money or even buy him a property before he becomes of age, what do you think would have happened? The truth is that the child won’t be able to appreciate the value of what he has because he hasn’t been matured or mentally transformed to understand the value of what he has. That’s simply how the power of transformation works.

Imagine, if the father of the child gives the child a car, the child might bash the car which can either lead to his death or even an arrest of the father who will eternally regret his action. The moral here is that one will have to mentally strong to manage certain opportunities, otherwise, it can become a curse as opposed to a blessing.

The reality of life is that, for you to get to a certain position you must be renewed in mind, otherwise one might make a mess of oneself.  The moral of this is that every time you are not mature enough to attract an opportunity either mentally or physically, that blessing can turn into a curse. This is because good things can be destroyed in the hands of someone who is not transformed to handle it.

Let’s take a case of the child who was given a car, imagine a case where a luxury car was given to a ten-year-old child to drive, that might sound like a blessing, but in reality, the car can lead to the death of that child because he’s not capable of driving the car or competent enough to appreciate what is in his hands.

Again, let’s see transformation from the spiritual perspective, sometimes success depends on many factors before they arrive at a certain level. Sometimes, you might be praying for an opportunity and the creator knows very well your mindset and thoughts needs cleansing from certain lifestyles, habits and associations before the blessings and prayers can work. In some cases, the creator knows fully well, you are not qualified for the position you are aspiring for, he might delay you to be fully transformed before your request is granted.

What really is transformation, Transformation is a thorough or dramatic change in form or appearance mentally or spiritually. Transformation changes the outlook of something. When you have a simple hair cut, you are transforming your face, just like how beauticians transform the face of someone when you dress, you are transforming yourself. When we talk of transformation, it’s not limited to academic, mental, spiritual, or even career. Transformation can take various forms; it can even take personal or developmental. Transformation can result because of an increase in your finances, health, education, relationship etc.

The blessings and opportunities of transformation are priceless. To get to the next stage of life, one needs to be transformed. Do you know there are certain opportunities you can’t get unless you are transformed, or have acquired certain skills or qualities. This is why Jim Rohm said Success is something you attract by the person you become” For you to become, you must transform yourself by adding value to yourself.

Let me share a personal story with you. During my formative years in New York, I worked as a security officer for many years, many people laughed at me, some used sarcastic words by way of mockery, the future appeared bleak and insecure for me. I was privileged to have good mentors who honed my writing and speaking skills. Some believed in me, gave me opportunities, and spoke life into me. These acts inspired me to write my first and second book in addition to starting a human capacity development company. In three ways, I have seen myself traveling to different countries, speaking on various leadership and human development topics. I have also appeared on television, gained social currency, etc all because of the transformation that has taken place in my life.

If you truly want to be great, you must be truly transformed. After all, isn’t it true that you can’t be doing the same thing repeatedly and remain the same. In the journey of life, transformation is not negotiable. It should be noted, transformation is not a gift, neither can it be received by impartation, you must work for it by earning it.

For spiritual transformation to manifest, you must mortify your flesh, you must be delivered, you must be renewed in your mind, and be circumcised to get to a certain level.

To be fully transformed is not easy. It takes a lot of hard work and principles. For instance, one must be consistent. One of the painful experiences of life is beginning a task and leaving it halfway.

Transformation prepares one for the task ahead. The worst thing that can happen to anyone is entering a relationship, business, spiritual realm etc. without being transformed. It’s just like going into marriage without taking a marriage course to know the basics of marriage or going into a ministry without divine assignment and complete transformation, you might have a hard time succeeding when you hit a roadblock.

To be transformed, one must develop or seek knowledge, practice meditation, and separate oneself from anything that’s not consistent with the principles, vision, and ideology one wishes to uphold.

When you are transformed, there are certain benefits that will come to you. Transformation will position you for better opportunities, which can launch you into your destiny.; and it makes people appreciate you more due to the value you earn. For example, personal transformation can make you healthy if you decide to work on your diet. You can exercise, you can read, you can learn a skill and attend professional or certificate courses to enhance your knowledge on a particular subject matter. Personal transformation can help you to improve personal relationships.

In conclusion, if you want to get to the next stage or attract the next bi opportunity, endeavor to work more on yourself than you do on your job. This is because when you work on your job you can make a living, but when you work on yourself, you can make a fortune.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your  and Unleash Your Destiny .  He can be reached via info@gloemi.com

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Adding Value

Adding Value: Dealing with Defective Success by Henry Ukazu

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Dear Destiny Friends,

According to Mark Twain, “the two most important days in your Life is the day you were born and the day you found out why.” Why is this important? One of the best questions any rational and progressive mind must endeavor to answer before he leaves this sinful world is discovering the purpose of his existence. Whether one is in the academic space, relationship/marriage, entertainment, sports, business, political or otherwise, they must understand the basics and foundations, otherwise they might be just leaning on the wrong ladder of success.

In understanding defective success, let’s use a practical case of someone who is successful in his career, but failed in managing his family due to focusing more time on his career. Also, let’s see a case of an entrepreneur who was busy chasing contracts and money at the detriment of his sleep, and when he finally gets the money, his health has deteriorated.

Also, imagine a student who is wired to study Political Science or Philosophy in college, but somehow found himself studying Law due to the advice and influence of mentors or counselors, who felt he could do well in that area. The student might do well as a lawyer, but the question remains if he would be fulfilled as a man?

Furthermore, a lady might want to marry a man just because he has access to money as opposed to the values the man represents. The lady might end up having the man, but lacking the most important part of marital life, which is peace of mind and fulfilment.

The list is literally endless, but the moral of the question is, someone might get to the peak of his career, have access to money and the good things of life, but still misses a fundamental aspect of life-fulfilment.

What therefore, is defective success? Defective success is achieving a goal or assignment you are not sent for, or leaning on the wrong side of the wall. Not how far you have come, but how far you should have gone.

Defective success is simply leaning on the wrong ladder of success. Imagine leaning on the wrong ladder to climb up a position and when you get to your destination, you now discover you were leaning on the wrong ladder, which literally means, though you reached the peak, however, the gains and blessings would have been much higher if that’s the purpose you have been destined to do. What most people fail to understand is that one can be successful at something they are not called to do, and that’s defective success.

But how does defective success works? There is a story told by one of my mentors, Sir Fela Durutoye, a leadership expert, on how an Executive Director of a bank fell victim to defective success. According to him, this man participated in one of his training sessions and after the training, the man told him he had made him lose his job. Mr. Fela asked, how? He responded that after listening to him, he discovered he was meant to be a leadership consultant as opposed to a bank executive. The interesting thing about this bank executive was that, when he approached the bank to inform them of his desire to resign and become a leadership consultant, not only did his bank hire him to train their staff, but they also paid him twice his salary as Executive Director in the bank.  The moral of this story is that, when you are doing what you are supposed to, the universe will locate you. Again, when you are working on purpose, your reward will be priceless.

Just to illustrate this point. Sometimes, hardship can make one relocate to another country for greener pastures, thinking that’s the best thing to do, however, only to find out, his purpose was not that in that country. The person might be living, but the impact he’s supposed to make in the world will not be manifested in the lives of people he was called to serve. Moral: May we not lose the impact we are created for just because of comfort or temporary setback.

Most people don’t understand how defective success works. They just think when they have made money, have influence and more, they have arrived, however, they fail to understand that in life, there’s more to money.

As you crave for success, you must train your mind and body to have the right value system, the right mindset, the right belief system, and your aspiration and goals must be the one you set for yourself and not the one anyone sets for you.

Do you know your success is tied to the reason you are created? Success can also be tied to the resources you are given. This is because you can’t separate success from purpose.

Let me elaborate, your purpose was made in Heaven and your assignment is to fulfil the assignment on earth. So, it is the one who sends you on an assignment that will determine the rubric of the success. If in your calculated wisdom, you have attained success, but your success is not in line with the definition of success by your mentor or manager, that’s defective success.

The question now becomes how does one avoid being a victim of defective success? The first step is to live a life of purpose.

Myles Munroe, an evangelist, was right when he stated, “when the purpose of a thing is not known, abuse is inevitable’. Every person was created for a reason. We are all wired in a certain way to accomplish a particular purpose.

Do you know at the end of life, we will give account of all we have been given at creation. Now imagine, if you are giving your report and you derail from the purpose, assignment, and problem you have been commissioned with the resources you were given at creation.

To avoid the pains of defective success, here are three things you should focus on. 1. One must focus on working and building on their talent. You are expected to use your talent to fulfil your divine purpose. 2. Your personality: This is what gives you comfort in the place of your purpose. When your purpose is in alignment with your talent, you won’t experience stress, rather you will experience a little stretch. Third and most important passion: Passion is inbuilt, when you are passionate about a cause, your pain, detractors, and challenges will serve as inspiration and distractions because you have a burning desire to accomplish something that is built in you which you are created to do. But when you are not working on purpose, you won’t experience strength, peace of mind and fulfilment.

Let me share a little bit of personal experience with you. Despite studying Taxation Law in New York Law School, I wasn’t passionate about the major. I remember when I was offered a decent salary by the New York City Department of Finance to begin my career as a Tax Specialist, I didn’t take the offer because I wasn’t passionate about the industry. I ended up settling for a Case Manager position, which offered me half of the pay I got for taxation.

The interesting thing was that I got joy, fulfilment, and most importantly, it aligned with my passion for service for humanity.  Moral: When you are working on purpose, you’ll control money as opposed to being a slave to money. When you are passionate about a cause, you will be equipped with the talent to solve any challenge that may arise.

It’s instructive to note that when passion finds assignment, fulfillment is met, but when passion is lacking, it can lead to frustration. Be advised, even when you are working on purpose and a cause you are passionate about, you are bound to experience some level of frustration, but this frustration might not be the same as when you are doing what you are not created to do, rather it will serve as an alarm clock saying, what you are doing is not what you are created to do. Every time you are working on defective success, you won’t get fulfillment and a little distraction can lead to frustration.

When you are working on purpose and you experience frustration, you’ll have a certain level of peace despite the pain because somehow, you are working on purpose.

It’s sad to note that many people are not working where they are supposed to work, while some are working on a job they are not supposed to work.

Question: How do I find my purpose to avoid defective success?

If purpose is the reason for your existence, your best bet is to ask the manufacturer if you have the manual of any product. This is because you are not an accident. You are created and equipped on purpose to solve a problem. Your purpose was made in heaven and it’s eternal, but your assignment is time bound which must be fulfilled on earth.

For instance, your purpose cannot be changed, but your assignment varies. For instance, your purpose of going to school from primary school to university never changes, because it’s centered on acquiring education, but your assignment may change because your assignment at each stage from primary one to university will change as your progress.

Again, when your assignment changes, it’s still working on the grand scheme of things. This is why when you experience challenges, it’s part of the trials and dynamics to position and strengthen you to the place you are supposed to be. Moral:  Don’t get distracted. Stay focused.

Connect with your purpose by finding your assignment. Anytime you follow the voice of the one who sent you, he will lead you to the next assignment.

When you are working on purpose, everything you need to succeed will be given to you at your place of assignment by the creator and manufacturer. Therefore, you must connect with your purpose to fulfil your purpose. According to Fela Durutoye, the future is everything you can be, but you are yet to become, the future is everything you can possess or achieve but you are yet to achieve or possess it. Your task is to deliver the future, but that will only come when you are working on purpose.

In conclusion, you must give your time, energy, money and resources to do what you are created to do. You were given everything from eternity to ensure you succeed, but you will only succeed when you are living or working on purpose.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your  and Unleash Your Destiny .  He can be reached via info@gloemi.com

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Adding Value

Adding Value: Success and the Irony of Conspiracy by Henry Ukazu

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Dear Destiny Friends,

Many years ago, I listened to a powerful sermon by Reverend Fr. Ejike Mbaka titled Wicked Generation. According to him, we live in a wicked generation. That sermon was not only powerful, but also thought-provoking, and enlightening.

Howerver, after listening to that sermon, I began to have trust issues with people because it made me believe human beings can be deceitful, unreasonable, self-centered, selfish, dishonest and ungrateful.

The teaching created in me a deep awareness about the fragility of human beings. I also learned from the teaching that being oneself and doing good regardless of how bad human beings can be is the ultimate. Another simple message, which resonated from the teaching stated that people can fail you regardless of how many times you have come through for them.

Let me elaborate more with the words of Mother Theresa: “People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self centered; Forgive them anyway.

“If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; Be kind anyway.

“If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies;
Succeed anyway.

“If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you; Be honest and frank anyway.

“What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; Build anyway.

“If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous; Be happy anyway.

“The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; Do good anyway.

“Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough; Give the world the best you’ve got anyway.

“You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and your God; It was never between you and them anyway”.

If you look at the words of Mother Theresa, you will observe that we live in an unfair society where most people are filled with ingratitude and wickedness. Despite how good you are, some people will still act like distractors and conspire to bring you down simply because you are successful. This conspiracy comes in various ways and forms.

In the journey of life, friends, family members, associates/colleagues, partners, supposed benefactors, mentors, mentees and others can conspire to make you succeed as well as bring you down. Even government machineries can enact policies which can affect your business either positively or negatively.

But the irony of life is that while they are trying to hurt you, they won’t know they are working according to the grand scheme of things. According to Joel Osteen, it’s a setup for success. In the same way, sometimes, what we think we are doing right can lead to our demise. For instance, someone might relocate to another country thinking it’s a better plan, but it might lead to misfortunes. Your focus should be to know the will of God in your life.

Also, as a young person, you might think someone is meant for you because they look good, and have prospects, but they are not meant for you. In fact, they might even lead you to your doom. These are parts of the challenges and vicissitudes of life.

Again sometimes, your problems, challenges, setbacks, misfortunes, and pains can be the turning point in your life. That’s why it’s always important to think out of the box whenever you experience pain because your disappointments can be a blessing.

Though our destinies are in our hands, we must also know that luck exists, and what will be will be, all things being equal.

Much as we have the choice to do or not to do certain things that can influence our life, we must take cognizance of the God factor in the scheme of things. No matter the direction one is moving, once the creator of the universe steps in, He can influence a definite turnaround to your benefit, and made things work for good for you along the line your life is destined to be.

God can turn things around through diverse means including even causing an accident, where the person, who will rescue you, attend to tou will eventually be your life partner, or tangible benefactor. This is an example of a conspiracy of success.

Furthermore, you might be in a job you don’t like, or living in a building, environment, or apartment you don’t like; the universe can cause a scene to happen, and you will be surprised to know how the odds will not only line up for you, but systematically add up for you.

Did you know the spiritual controls the physical? Before anything happens physically, it has already happened spiritually. It’s been said that human beings normally die in the spiritual reign before they die physically. I don’t know how true that statement is, but I do know that there are spiritual forces and elements operating on the planet.

These forces can also conspire to work against one if they are not spiritually discerning.

According to Dr. Yomi Garnett, “Always look for the good in every situation. Develop the mindset that every setback is part of a great plan. A conspiracy if you like, that is moving you toward the success that is inevitably yours. In other words, become an inverse optimist. This means that every turn the whole world is in a conspiracy to do you good.”

To understand the above statement, one must have a positive mindset. One must be able to think out of the box, and one must believe disappointments, and pains can be turned into pleasure.

This is how the conspiracy of success works; you might have a product or service which adds value to humanity, and you might be wondering how to impact globally. Did you know the universe can use social media to announce you or connect you to your destiny helper. A friend can locate you, recommend or refer you; a company might even pick up your work, or it might even go viral. In such situations, the universe can conspire with your destiny to align for you.

Let me share a practical story about how the universe conspired to work for me. In 2017, I resigned from my job as a Case Manager to see my late grandmother, who was always appearing to me in my dream. That decision wasn’t a popular one with my family members and friends because they imagined how I would survive upon arrival from Nigeria.

The interesting thing was that there was no set plan on the ground to secure a job, but my strength lies more in my belief system. The joy of seeing my late grandmother was more fulfilling to me than my job or anything at the time.

One fateful day,  I was on the street of New York marketing my book after I returned. It was then I met a young man who works with a television organization; I shared my work, and vision for the youths with him, and he was impressed, and gave me his number.

Guess what, three years later, when President Trump issued a Travel Ban against Nigeria, I was interviewed by the New York Times and these young people read my interview and reached out to me to interview me. The rest they say is history.

The moral here is that the universe used President Trump to put me in the spotlight, but more importantly, if not for my late grandmother, I wouldn’t have been on the streets of New York because I would have been at work on that fateful day.

In conclusion, don’t be hard on yourself when things don’t add up for you, and don’t be too sure you are on the right track because on both cases, the universe can spring up a surprise, rather always seek the face of the creator of the universe to direct your path, in addition to directing and blessing the works of your hands.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your  and Unleash Your Destiny .  He can be reached via info@gloemi.com

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