Connect with us

Adding Value

Adding Value: Succeeding Through Relationship and Association by Henry Ukazu

Published

on

Greetings Destiny Friends,

A man only learns in two ways, one by reading, and the other by association with smarter people – Will Rogers

Success and failure have many components and characteristics, and one of them is association. However, many people don’t understand the power of association. Association works with relations. When you work and hang out with the right set of people, your chance of succeeding in life will be greater.

Did you know that your mindset contributes to success? As a matter of fact, your mindset can be described as the foundation of success because the success and failure of anyone starts from the mind. If you have the right mindset, you will think of the right relationship and association to belong to. If you have the right mindset, you will be concerned about your environment which can also contribute to your success.

Your attitude will change for the better if you have a progressive mindset, but if you have myopic and fixed mindset, your thoughts and experience will be limited regardless of your experience in a particular environment.

When people talk of relationship and association, it relates to the fabric of our society which starts from the family. A solid family where love and kindness are shown to the children, spreads love and unity among the siblings which in turn affects the society. When hatred, malice, wickedness, ungratefulness, and unhealthy attitude is sowed in the minds of children, they go out to the society with a hostile mindset. That’s why we have funny people and leaders who act like people without conscience.

Most people don’t know how blessed they are to be raised by decent parents in addition to having great siblings, until they meet people who have been damaged by society.

When one nurtures the right relationship, they are bound to reap the benefits when the right opportunity presents itself. It’s sad to note that many people have placed pecuniary gains and materialistic things above access and knowledge.

When you invest time and resources into the right relationship, it will germinate like a seed that is planted on a fertile soil. These relationships will introduce you to the right associations which will in turn provide you with the information you will need to succeed.

The power of information cannot be overemphasized. Information will only come to you when you have the right relationship and association. Did you know that if you are not informed, you are ill-informed and once you are ill-informed, you can’t perform because information leads to reformation and transformation. In fact, information leads to formation. You are a product of what you have learned, if you don’t read, you won’t know.

According to Charlie “Tremendous” Jones, “You are the same person today and in five years except for two things: the people you meet and the books you read.”

On a personal note, I can attribute my success to the relationship and association I keep. Sometimes, people ask me how I do what I do and how I meet the people I meet. I simply tell them, I’m smart by association and I’m a voracious reader. I say this because I am very intentional in what I do and how I relate with people.

Still on association, when people join associations or live in a particular neighborhood, they do it for a reason. When people pay to attend certain events, schools or travel or even volunteer for certain people or associations, they are doing it for a reason. When people seek mentors, they are seeking for people they hold in high esteem either in their professional capacity or based on their principles or integrity. Even the book of life says Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm. (“Proverbs 13:20).

One may be concerned; how does one build these powerful associations? It begins with being selective and intentional. The first question, one needs to ask oneself is what do I want from this person or association?  It’s important to align yourself with individuals who share your values and aspirations.

The next step is to embrace diversity. It’s imperative that you connect with people from various backgrounds, cultures, and perspectives to life. This will help to enrich your experience, worldview, in addition to making you more innovative and adaptive. We live in a global and social economy. Like I always say, why be local when you can be global?

Furthermore, according to an African proverb “If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together.” You cannot do life alone. All you need is the right people and association. The right people will support your efforts and accelerate your success. The wrong people will retard your progress altogether. According to kola Adesina, CEO Sahara Group, what you need in life is the right people and not necessarily Presidents, Governors, celebrities or people with money.

In conclusion, do you want to succeed in life? Then be intentional with books, people and association.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate and creative writer Design Your Destiny and Unleash Your Destiny.  He can be reached via info@gloemi.com

Continue Reading
Click to comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Adding Value

Adding Value: Your Passion Will Be Tested by Henry Ukazu

Published

on

By

Dear Destiny Friends,

In the journey of life, everyone will be tested, and tests come in various ways. Someone can be tested with power, money, love, work, passion, etc. I think the ultimate test one will experience is the test for the love of God. One might be wondering why the test. Well, tests help to determine one’s interest in life. Tests help to know who someone is, and tests help one to be strong.

According to some schools of thought, if you want to know someone’s character, give him money and power. It’s easy for someone to say if I have an opportunity to be in government, I will do this and that, if I have money, I will help the less privileged, if I marry, I won’t cheat on my partner, if I’m employed, I will do my best, etc. The list is literally endless, but the truth is what will determine how effective one can be is the trial they will have to overcome, and this is where the test of life plays out.

Test is not as bad as some people will see it. Rather, it is used to determine how passionate someone can be to a cause. Just imagine someone saying I’m interested in serving humanity. The passion in that person will make the person look for an opportunity to make an impact in the lives of people. The test this fellow will pass might be leaving a well-paying job for a job that not only pays less, but also gives one the opportunity to serve people.

When you are working on passion, you will experience distraction, your love, loyalty, interest, personality, and faith will be tested in several ways. But if you believe in your cause, you will be determined to overcome it by seeing all the trial and challenges as distractions.

On a personal note, I have experienced my own test of passion. After studying Taxation Law at New York Law School, I refused to work in the industry which pays more and settled for a case manager job. In all sincerity, it wasn’t really a case of passion, but a case of lack of interest, joy, and fulfilment in the industry.

Again, writing and publishing articles every week is not an easy task, because it can be draining and energy sapping. If you think it’s easy to write an average of one thousand three hundred words every week consistently, please try it. Be advised, it takes more than passion to write every week. Discipline, interest and most importantly, the grace of God is at play.

It’s worthy to note that passion means different things to different people. Some people derive passion in acting, astronomy, science, computer programing, cooking, dancing, driving, exercising, family/relationship, fishing, health & wellness, investing, ministering, money, sports, praying, reading, singing, writing, teaching, travelling, swimming etc. This interest probably arose from childhood or experience of life.

Think back to when you were growing up, planning your future. What did you want to be when you grew up? A doctor? An engineer? An accountant, a pharmacist? A lawyer? A pilot? Etc. How did you come up with those occupations? It probably had something to do with things you lived to do or achievements you associated with those jobs.

Maybe you wanted to be a doctor because you had a passion for helping people; an athlete because you loved playing sports; a novelist because you were compelled to express yourself creatively.

Sometimes, I see entrepreneurs who have labored for a while and are on the verge of quitting, what comes to my mind is simply, they are not passionate about their business. Don’t get me wrong, one can still be passionate for a cause and still quit, especially when it’s not adding up, but the point I’m trying to share is the drive, believe, interest, determination, and test for the business will be determined by one’s passion never to give up when the challenges come up.

To determine one’s interest and passion, three ingredients come into play, they are love, faith, and hope. One interesting thing about this trial of excellence is that they are intertwined in one single umbrella – inspiration. According to Dr. Yomi Garnett, Faith- opens the doorway to inspiration. Hope powers the forward thrust of inspiration, Love gives divine direction to inspiration. Let’s analyze these qualities.

Love: As fondly stated, love is feeling, the same is applicable to passion. When you are passionate about a cause, the feeling will be different from that of someone who has a different passion. Your passion can be seen the way you love a person or business. You can’t love a person, business, or cause without making an effort to invest in it.

Faith:  This is what opens the door to inspiration. Do you know some people can be inspired by the faith you have in a project? It’s your faith in your business or “cause” you believe that will enable you to invest time and resources into the venture. It’s only fools and uninformed people who invest their time and resources in business ventures or relationships they have no interest or passion about.

Hope: This is the lubricant that fuels the energy to drive home your vision. When people see the vision and passion you have for a project, they will be inspired to join you in bringing it to fruition or reality.

In conclusion, just so you know, regardless of what you are doing or passionate about, just know, you will be tested, but when you are tested, just know the test is to know how much you believe in a project or person.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your  and Unleash Your Destiny .  He can be reached via info@gloemi.com

Continue Reading

Adding Value

Adding Value: The Power of Transformation by Henry Ukazu

Published

on

By

Dear Destiny Friends,

Apart from having access to power, opportunities and being financially independent, nothing elevates a human being more than transformation.

Transformation occurs in different stages of life. Plants experience transformation by metamorphosis; animals experience transformation, human beings experience transformation; children, parents, students, leaders etc. all experience transformation from conception to death.

In the academic or professional environment, before anyone can be transformed, one must have added value to oneself which will enable him to serve and make an impact in the world. Transformation comes in various ways, one can transform by meeting someone, going to school, having a relationship with your creator, learning a skill and being in the political space.

In the journey of life, most people undergo multiple transformations throughout their lives. Although change can be uncomfortable, it can open new layers of life if one is properly transformed. Transformation is a powerful, valuable experience that’s capable of giving one what I call an encounter.

Do you know an encounter can lead to a transformation. Whenever you have an encounter, your life will change. An encounter can be meeting someone, attaining financial independence, getting a new job, or even accruing a formal education.

Let me share an example of how transformation works. Imagine a parent who saves hundreds of dollars   every week for his child until the child becomes of age, say 18 or 25 years and he decides to pay for college to buy a property for the child. Also, contrast the same scenario to when the father decides to give that child the money or even buy him a property before he becomes of age, what do you think would have happened? The truth is that the child won’t be able to appreciate the value of what he has because he hasn’t been matured or mentally transformed to understand the value of what he has. That’s simply how the power of transformation works.

Imagine, if the father of the child gives the child a car, the child might bash the car which can either lead to his death or even an arrest of the father who will eternally regret his action. The moral here is that one will have to mentally strong to manage certain opportunities, otherwise, it can become a curse as opposed to a blessing.

The reality of life is that, for you to get to a certain position you must be renewed in mind, otherwise one might make a mess of oneself.  The moral of this is that every time you are not mature enough to attract an opportunity either mentally or physically, that blessing can turn into a curse. This is because good things can be destroyed in the hands of someone who is not transformed to handle it.

Let’s take a case of the child who was given a car, imagine a case where a luxury car was given to a ten-year-old child to drive, that might sound like a blessing, but in reality, the car can lead to the death of that child because he’s not capable of driving the car or competent enough to appreciate what is in his hands.

Again, let’s see transformation from the spiritual perspective, sometimes success depends on many factors before they arrive at a certain level. Sometimes, you might be praying for an opportunity and the creator knows very well your mindset and thoughts needs cleansing from certain lifestyles, habits and associations before the blessings and prayers can work. In some cases, the creator knows fully well, you are not qualified for the position you are aspiring for, he might delay you to be fully transformed before your request is granted.

What really is transformation, Transformation is a thorough or dramatic change in form or appearance mentally or spiritually. Transformation changes the outlook of something. When you have a simple hair cut, you are transforming your face, just like how beauticians transform the face of someone when you dress, you are transforming yourself. When we talk of transformation, it’s not limited to academic, mental, spiritual, or even career. Transformation can take various forms; it can even take personal or developmental. Transformation can result because of an increase in your finances, health, education, relationship etc.

The blessings and opportunities of transformation are priceless. To get to the next stage of life, one needs to be transformed. Do you know there are certain opportunities you can’t get unless you are transformed, or have acquired certain skills or qualities. This is why Jim Rohm said Success is something you attract by the person you become” For you to become, you must transform yourself by adding value to yourself.

Let me share a personal story with you. During my formative years in New York, I worked as a security officer for many years, many people laughed at me, some used sarcastic words by way of mockery, the future appeared bleak and insecure for me. I was privileged to have good mentors who honed my writing and speaking skills. Some believed in me, gave me opportunities, and spoke life into me. These acts inspired me to write my first and second book in addition to starting a human capacity development company. In three ways, I have seen myself traveling to different countries, speaking on various leadership and human development topics. I have also appeared on television, gained social currency, etc all because of the transformation that has taken place in my life.

If you truly want to be great, you must be truly transformed. After all, isn’t it true that you can’t be doing the same thing repeatedly and remain the same. In the journey of life, transformation is not negotiable. It should be noted, transformation is not a gift, neither can it be received by impartation, you must work for it by earning it.

For spiritual transformation to manifest, you must mortify your flesh, you must be delivered, you must be renewed in your mind, and be circumcised to get to a certain level.

To be fully transformed is not easy. It takes a lot of hard work and principles. For instance, one must be consistent. One of the painful experiences of life is beginning a task and leaving it halfway.

Transformation prepares one for the task ahead. The worst thing that can happen to anyone is entering a relationship, business, spiritual realm etc. without being transformed. It’s just like going into marriage without taking a marriage course to know the basics of marriage or going into a ministry without divine assignment and complete transformation, you might have a hard time succeeding when you hit a roadblock.

To be transformed, one must develop or seek knowledge, practice meditation, and separate oneself from anything that’s not consistent with the principles, vision, and ideology one wishes to uphold.

When you are transformed, there are certain benefits that will come to you. Transformation will position you for better opportunities, which can launch you into your destiny.; and it makes people appreciate you more due to the value you earn. For example, personal transformation can make you healthy if you decide to work on your diet. You can exercise, you can read, you can learn a skill and attend professional or certificate courses to enhance your knowledge on a particular subject matter. Personal transformation can help you to improve personal relationships.

In conclusion, if you want to get to the next stage or attract the next bi opportunity, endeavor to work more on yourself than you do on your job. This is because when you work on your job you can make a living, but when you work on yourself, you can make a fortune.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your  and Unleash Your Destiny .  He can be reached via info@gloemi.com

Continue Reading

Adding Value

Adding Value: Dealing with Defective Success by Henry Ukazu

Published

on

By

Dear Destiny Friends,

According to Mark Twain, “the two most important days in your Life is the day you were born and the day you found out why.” Why is this important? One of the best questions any rational and progressive mind must endeavor to answer before he leaves this sinful world is discovering the purpose of his existence. Whether one is in the academic space, relationship/marriage, entertainment, sports, business, political or otherwise, they must understand the basics and foundations, otherwise they might be just leaning on the wrong ladder of success.

In understanding defective success, let’s use a practical case of someone who is successful in his career, but failed in managing his family due to focusing more time on his career. Also, let’s see a case of an entrepreneur who was busy chasing contracts and money at the detriment of his sleep, and when he finally gets the money, his health has deteriorated.

Also, imagine a student who is wired to study Political Science or Philosophy in college, but somehow found himself studying Law due to the advice and influence of mentors or counselors, who felt he could do well in that area. The student might do well as a lawyer, but the question remains if he would be fulfilled as a man?

Furthermore, a lady might want to marry a man just because he has access to money as opposed to the values the man represents. The lady might end up having the man, but lacking the most important part of marital life, which is peace of mind and fulfilment.

The list is literally endless, but the moral of the question is, someone might get to the peak of his career, have access to money and the good things of life, but still misses a fundamental aspect of life-fulfilment.

What therefore, is defective success? Defective success is achieving a goal or assignment you are not sent for, or leaning on the wrong side of the wall. Not how far you have come, but how far you should have gone.

Defective success is simply leaning on the wrong ladder of success. Imagine leaning on the wrong ladder to climb up a position and when you get to your destination, you now discover you were leaning on the wrong ladder, which literally means, though you reached the peak, however, the gains and blessings would have been much higher if that’s the purpose you have been destined to do. What most people fail to understand is that one can be successful at something they are not called to do, and that’s defective success.

But how does defective success works? There is a story told by one of my mentors, Sir Fela Durutoye, a leadership expert, on how an Executive Director of a bank fell victim to defective success. According to him, this man participated in one of his training sessions and after the training, the man told him he had made him lose his job. Mr. Fela asked, how? He responded that after listening to him, he discovered he was meant to be a leadership consultant as opposed to a bank executive. The interesting thing about this bank executive was that, when he approached the bank to inform them of his desire to resign and become a leadership consultant, not only did his bank hire him to train their staff, but they also paid him twice his salary as Executive Director in the bank.  The moral of this story is that, when you are doing what you are supposed to, the universe will locate you. Again, when you are working on purpose, your reward will be priceless.

Just to illustrate this point. Sometimes, hardship can make one relocate to another country for greener pastures, thinking that’s the best thing to do, however, only to find out, his purpose was not that in that country. The person might be living, but the impact he’s supposed to make in the world will not be manifested in the lives of people he was called to serve. Moral: May we not lose the impact we are created for just because of comfort or temporary setback.

Most people don’t understand how defective success works. They just think when they have made money, have influence and more, they have arrived, however, they fail to understand that in life, there’s more to money.

As you crave for success, you must train your mind and body to have the right value system, the right mindset, the right belief system, and your aspiration and goals must be the one you set for yourself and not the one anyone sets for you.

Do you know your success is tied to the reason you are created? Success can also be tied to the resources you are given. This is because you can’t separate success from purpose.

Let me elaborate, your purpose was made in Heaven and your assignment is to fulfil the assignment on earth. So, it is the one who sends you on an assignment that will determine the rubric of the success. If in your calculated wisdom, you have attained success, but your success is not in line with the definition of success by your mentor or manager, that’s defective success.

The question now becomes how does one avoid being a victim of defective success? The first step is to live a life of purpose.

Myles Munroe, an evangelist, was right when he stated, “when the purpose of a thing is not known, abuse is inevitable’. Every person was created for a reason. We are all wired in a certain way to accomplish a particular purpose.

Do you know at the end of life, we will give account of all we have been given at creation. Now imagine, if you are giving your report and you derail from the purpose, assignment, and problem you have been commissioned with the resources you were given at creation.

To avoid the pains of defective success, here are three things you should focus on. 1. One must focus on working and building on their talent. You are expected to use your talent to fulfil your divine purpose. 2. Your personality: This is what gives you comfort in the place of your purpose. When your purpose is in alignment with your talent, you won’t experience stress, rather you will experience a little stretch. Third and most important passion: Passion is inbuilt, when you are passionate about a cause, your pain, detractors, and challenges will serve as inspiration and distractions because you have a burning desire to accomplish something that is built in you which you are created to do. But when you are not working on purpose, you won’t experience strength, peace of mind and fulfilment.

Let me share a little bit of personal experience with you. Despite studying Taxation Law in New York Law School, I wasn’t passionate about the major. I remember when I was offered a decent salary by the New York City Department of Finance to begin my career as a Tax Specialist, I didn’t take the offer because I wasn’t passionate about the industry. I ended up settling for a Case Manager position, which offered me half of the pay I got for taxation.

The interesting thing was that I got joy, fulfilment, and most importantly, it aligned with my passion for service for humanity.  Moral: When you are working on purpose, you’ll control money as opposed to being a slave to money. When you are passionate about a cause, you will be equipped with the talent to solve any challenge that may arise.

It’s instructive to note that when passion finds assignment, fulfillment is met, but when passion is lacking, it can lead to frustration. Be advised, even when you are working on purpose and a cause you are passionate about, you are bound to experience some level of frustration, but this frustration might not be the same as when you are doing what you are not created to do, rather it will serve as an alarm clock saying, what you are doing is not what you are created to do. Every time you are working on defective success, you won’t get fulfillment and a little distraction can lead to frustration.

When you are working on purpose and you experience frustration, you’ll have a certain level of peace despite the pain because somehow, you are working on purpose.

It’s sad to note that many people are not working where they are supposed to work, while some are working on a job they are not supposed to work.

Question: How do I find my purpose to avoid defective success?

If purpose is the reason for your existence, your best bet is to ask the manufacturer if you have the manual of any product. This is because you are not an accident. You are created and equipped on purpose to solve a problem. Your purpose was made in heaven and it’s eternal, but your assignment is time bound which must be fulfilled on earth.

For instance, your purpose cannot be changed, but your assignment varies. For instance, your purpose of going to school from primary school to university never changes, because it’s centered on acquiring education, but your assignment may change because your assignment at each stage from primary one to university will change as your progress.

Again, when your assignment changes, it’s still working on the grand scheme of things. This is why when you experience challenges, it’s part of the trials and dynamics to position and strengthen you to the place you are supposed to be. Moral:  Don’t get distracted. Stay focused.

Connect with your purpose by finding your assignment. Anytime you follow the voice of the one who sent you, he will lead you to the next assignment.

When you are working on purpose, everything you need to succeed will be given to you at your place of assignment by the creator and manufacturer. Therefore, you must connect with your purpose to fulfil your purpose. According to Fela Durutoye, the future is everything you can be, but you are yet to become, the future is everything you can possess or achieve but you are yet to achieve or possess it. Your task is to deliver the future, but that will only come when you are working on purpose.

In conclusion, you must give your time, energy, money and resources to do what you are created to do. You were given everything from eternity to ensure you succeed, but you will only succeed when you are living or working on purpose.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your  and Unleash Your Destiny .  He can be reached via info@gloemi.com

Continue Reading

Trending