Dear Destiny Friends,

Anyone who intends to go far in life must be intentional in stretching himself, and that explains why the importance of stretching oneself cannot be overemphasized. Nobody will assist anyone when they are not intentional in helping themselves. Someone’s ability to convince others of how passionate and dedicated they are concerning a given cause, position or project, is one of the weapons of inspiration that draws assistance. There aren’t many out there that stumbles into investing help where there’s no passion or dedication to a cause.

I will be sharing a personal, but practical experience that inspired this article with a background in my spiritual leader, Evangelist Ebuka Anozie Obi’s statement that, “I’m not preaching about Jesus Christ I heard, but I am talking about Jesus Christ I have personally experienced”. This statement captured my thoughts and mindset about this article.

In recent times, I have discovered the importance of being practical when writing or living generally. For instance, I got the inspiration to write this article a week ago when I visited the gym at my workplace. I was literally amazed to see the transformation that has taken place in my life.

The sad reality of life is most people want to go to heaven, but they are not willing to die. This means that a lot of people want to be celebrated, they are not willing to do the needful. How can people support you when you are not making an effort to succeed? Sometimes, ignorant minds want their benefactors, mentors or even destiny helpers to fasttrack their opportunities, but they are not willing to learn or do the associate work.

It’s instructive to note that your benefactors are not the lamb of God, who takes aways the sins of the world. They won’t do the work for you, rather, they will put the icing on the cake after the progressive minds must have done 90% of the work. This is just the reality of life.

Let me share a practical experience with you, I have a resourceful mentor with global influence. When my first book was ready for publication, I reached out to him to write the foreword, and he was glad. According to him, I have done something he has been willing to do for about 20 years. He was literally impressed to see my thoughts and efforts birthed into reality. The interesting thing about the success of my first book is that the book took me to New York Times, News12 in New York, United Nations in addition to introducing me to resourceful minds globally.

Imagine if I had not taken time to stretch myself, I wouldn’t have attained this height. That’s why I said, when you stretch yourself a little bit, there are bound to be opportunities and experiences that will come your way.

There was a recurrence of thesame experience when I incorporated my business, Global Empowerment and Mentoring Initiative, which helps uninformed youths and career professionals in self-discovery. Since forming the company, I have received invitations from resourceful minds, corporate organizations and contracts from the governments for training opportunities. I have also developed programs from my book and business. All this was made possible because I stretched myself.

Stretching oneself is not only limited to expanding one’s capacity, it also extends to expanding one’s mind. You can do this by reading and researching. It’s sad to know that many people find it hard to read and in fact, it is stated, if one wants to hide information from people, put it in a book because many people find it hard to read.

As human beings, we have an instructional need to stretch oneself. When we stretch ourselves, we’ll be surprised to see the level of opportunities we can attract to our careers, lives, and personal development. Stretching oneself is like taking risk, one will never know what to expect when one stretches oneself, but one thing is certain, we shall gain a new perspective and experience of life.

No great person has ever achieved success without stretching a bit further. They do this by taking unconventional paths which involve taking risks, taking certification courses, attending relevant events of interest, networking and learning from resource minds like mentors. All these are great ways of learning.

As a cultured Nigerian man, we have an adage that says, there’s no perfect time for one to learn, rather when an elderly person is speaking, a child who is there will pay attention. What does that mean? It simply means, when one stretches oneself, no one knows where the next opportunity will pop out.

For instance, when a recent graduate with a good grade, starts an entry level job, it might not necessarily be the grade that will secure the job, though it may contribute. It may surprise you to know that it may be your skills, extra work you have done or potentials that will give you the work. This simply means that one must add value to himself to attract opportunities, and attaining that opportunity entails comingout of your comfort zone.

Overtime, I have developed an intentional habit of updating my resume by adding value to my life by learning a skill every six months. Each time I add value to my work, I always see prospects each time I see someone of interest. I also evaluate my life and my work and see how I can edit my previous work and improve myself based on what I’m trying to achieve.

I don’t know what your storyline might be, but I’m here to encourage and inspire you to stretch yourself because nobody will save you other than yourself. The world is not a fair place, you just must do your best and leave the rest to God.

Do you know that stretching oneself also entails networking with resourceful and influential people. When you meet resourceful people with influence, endeavor to give them gifts as a token of appreciation for what they have either done for you, humanity or simply as a kind of gesture. That single kind gesture is capable of opening doors for you because it will separate you from other uninformed minds, who might be in the habit of begging without adding value to the person’s mind.

In conclusion, today I charge you to stretch yourself mentally, financially, socially, academically, spiritually, medically, professionally, personal development or in any other relevant area of your life and you will see your life blossoming.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design  and Unleash Your Destiny .  He can be reached via info@gloemi.com

By Henry Ukazu

Dear Destiny Friends,

No doubt, we are all familiar with the power behind thought, words, actions and principles. Much as these work in spectacular ways, the ability for one to direct and redirect them can be a game changer.

Whether one works in a public or private establishment, it is important to speak and act courteously because sometimes, it’s not really what one says that matter, but the manner of presentation.

Also, how parents talk to their children is very critical to their mental development, just as how two persons in a relationship talk to each other will affect their union. There’s no gainsaying the fact that words are powerful; they can make or mar a person of situation.

To imagine how powerful words are, consider how the pronouncements of the President of the United States of America can influence the stock market. In the same manner, the words of the President of any country can affect the country. Even the words of the Chief Executive Officer of a company can affect the company.

Uniformed minds are unaware of how potent words can be, so they speak without thinking about the damaging consequences of their words. As a rule of thumb, if your words won’t heal, please keep it. To buttress how damaging words can be, did you know there are certain people that will prefer you “hit” them than speaking to them in a condescending, derogative and denigrating manner.

The reason I had to lay the foundation of this topic on words is to show how our thoughts can affect our words. Isn’t it true that it is out of the abundance of the heart that the mouth speaks?

Redirecting one’s thoughts work perfectly with our words. There’s power in the spoken words. Whenever we speak, the walls hear, the ground stamps, and the air spreads them. It’s one thing to speak the words and it’s another thing to implement and execute the words with the right actions.

In my journey to life, I have come to understand the importance of redirecting one’s perception to life. Sometimes, we look at life from a narrow position instead of from a broad holistic perspective. For instance, if one fails in an examination, instead of apportioning blame to other factors, how about owning up by going to the drawing board to know where they missed it. The same principle is applicable should one fail in business, marriage or health.

Again, spiritual development is very critical to one’s enhancement. A spiritually grounded person will have his thoughts properly channeled when he experiences a setback. For instance, we are taught not to question God when we lose a loved one because He gives life, and He takes life. We are also taught to give thanks to God in all situations. These are practical ways of redirecting one’s thoughts.

If you don’t redirect your thoughts, other people will redirect it for you, but to suit their own principles. In every sphere of life, we are either directing or redirecting our lives because remaining stagnant can be disastrous. According to Alvin Toffler, “The illiterate of the 21st century will not be those who cannot read and write, but those who cannot learn, unlearn, and relearn”. So, it is important to examine the life one lives, as an “an unexamined life is not worth living”, according to Socrates.

Sometimes, we allow the experiences and challenges we go through life to either affect us or define us instead of changing our outlook and attitude to the experience. Most times, we don’t know we have the power and capacity to change the course of our lives; that we can literally turn our pain into gain, our lack to abundance, and our disadvantaged position to an advantaged position. All this will only work if we are able to redirect our thoughts in the right way.

Did you know that your experiences in life do not influence what you think about? Rather, it is what you think about that creates your experiences in life. Life is just a realization of your thoughts. According to Napoleon Hill in his book “Think and Grow Rich”, “whatsoever the mind can conceive, believe, it can achieve it”.

Furthermore, your lifestyle determines your life star, and your personality creates your personal reality. Therefore, the key to changing your life is through changing your thinking. Changing how you think is like packaging your business or writing a business proposal. If you don’t put the right information with the right words, the recipient might not be able to process your application very well, nor will they give it a positive consideration which it ultimately deserves.

Nobody knows what’s in one’s mind except one begins to act. To x-ray how one can redirect one’s thoughts, try as much as possible to have a positive outlook to life no matter how rough life throws dirt at you because it is what you think that you become. If you start thinking or imagining a red car, I can almost guarantee that you’ll not only begin to see red cars, you will begin to attract red cars, red vans, red trucks and red colors because you have positioned your mind to red. This is simply because our thoughts shape your reality.

On a personal note, I have been able to redirect my thoughts, my words, my actions and more importantly my perceptions to life, and this has greatly helped me profess things differently. I no longer take ‘things’ personally. I see people’s actions through their lens. I hear and interpret people’s words differently based on their understanding; I see the reaction and attitude of people based on what they have been exposed to.

As I conclude this article, I would like to ask; how do you process information? How do you see life? How do you redirect your thoughts when life doesn’t add up for you?

In conclusion, today, I charge you to learn how to put to good use the words of Alvin Toffler, to learn, relearn and unlearn many healthy and unhealthy practices by redirecting and channeling your thoughts and actions to the right side of life.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design  and Unleash Your Destiny .  He can be reached via info@gloemi.com

Dear Destiny Friends,

Gratitude is the one of the best currencies on planet earth, especially when properly utilized. Gratitude is just being grateful and being grateful is just expressing appreciation, concern and acknowledgement for favour received.

Gratitude; like relationship, value, skill, network, education, is a currency. Note that currency is not limited to money. Gratitude is much more than that.

A key determining factor towards identifying a person with a grateful heart, is the person’s attitude when he has or doesn’t have. How a person acts when he has money, and how a person acts when he doesn’t have money speak volumes. For example, when someone wants to know a loyal person, it’s advisable to remove the benefits the person normally receives because of the relationship they have with someone. If for example, someone asks you for money and you politely decline, watch the person’s attitude.

A person with a genuine heart of gratitude always go over and beyond to appreciate anyone, who has shown them favour, especially during their time of need. They hardly forget such good deeds. I can vividly remember when I was experiencing a financial meltdown during my formative years in U.S.A, and out of the blues, one of my mentors called me to inquire how I was faring, I used the opportunity to share with him my predicament, and was surprised how he used emotional intelligence to not only boost my moral, but also gave me eight hundred dollars. In all honesty, I do thank him almost every six months and yearly whenever I remember the good deeds until he felt uncomfortable with such an act and advised me to stop because according to him, that’s the least he could do.

You can be grateful even when life does not favour you. For instance, one might be looking for an opportunity and the opportunity doesn’t show up. Sometimes, it can be a blessing in disguise, because we might not know what was likely to happen in the near future. Imagine one applying for a job, and gets rejected for the position, only for the person to realize much later he would have experienced a toxic relationship both with respect to the work culture and human relationship which would have caused more harm than good to him. Also, imagine a scene where a man intends to a marry a lady or lady intends to marry a guy, and due to reasons beyond their comprehension, it didn’t work out, only for both parties to realize not only were they not compatible in terms of tolerance, they also had different spirits, values, vision and mindsets towards life.

This is the reason I personally don’t force relationships, opportunities or anything in life. I like the natural cause of life to always play itself out knowing fully well that the cup of water I will drink will never pass me by.

In the journey of life, I have come to realize the importance of not being desperate for opportunities. Patience has taught me, at the right time, everything will align well. I have had opportunities to make presentations, proposals in addition to meeting highly resourceful people, sometimes, the outcome is quite favorable, other times, it opens doors for more conversation, but one thing is certain I learnt something new from each engagement, but more importantly, I was grateful for the opportunity.

When we talk of patience, it is normal for one to feel a little bit worried if they are ripe for marriage, and no suitable partner is coming; it is normal for one to be concerned when the job is not coming through despite one acquiring all the necessary skills and qualifications; it’s normal for one to put in all the necessary work yet still finds it hard to break through. If you are in his state, I will strongly recommend you appreciate the process and gain inherent lessons associated with the experience.

It’s sad many people don’t know how to apply the principles of gratitude. Gratitude is like a knife, if you use the sharp side, it will hurt you and if you use the blunt side it won’t hurt like the sharp side. Do you know there’s how one will say thank you, and it will appear ungrateful and there’s how someone will say thank you for a little and inconsequential act, and it will attract a greater opportunity. That’s simply how life works. The way, manner, and style a person displays gratitude speaks volume. Gratitude is truly a skill which needs to be understudied.

Gratitude has many sides; let’s talk about the positive aspect of gratitude. Sometimes, some people complain of being the only child or not having family members, but they fail to understand that your family drama is the dream of an orphan. Your dirty dishes are evidence you have eaten. According to Reno Omokri, “your noisy house is proof you have active, healthy children. Your tired body is a sign you have work. And your jalopy car will make pedestrians jumpy and happy. Many of the things we complain about in life are signs that God has blessed us. Billions of people on Earth will gladly trade their lives for ours. Take time to give thanks to God.”

Again, gratitude has many sides; it all depends on the one a progressive mind decides to look on. Did you know that two people can experience pain, and they will react differently? Did you know some students might be in the same class but not all of them have the same level of vision on graduation? A group of people might be working on a project, but not all of them have the same mindset, ideology and vision for life.

Gratitude cuts accross all barriers of life. Whether life treats you fairly or unfairly, don’t be harsh on yourself, just accept your faith with a good attitude, and you will be surprised to see how the universe will work in alignment for you.

In summary, regardless of what life throws at you, endeavor to practice gratitude.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design  and Unleash Your Destiny .  He can be reached via info@gloemi.com