Adding Value
Adding Value: The Experience of Life by Henry Ukazu
Published
5 years agoon
By
EricGreetings Dear Friends,
Life is an experience every one of us must surely pass through. It is often said that our experience shapes/defines who we are. Regardless of how true or false you may feel about life, you’ll agree with me that to a reasonable extent, your experience has helped to shape some of your thoughts and actions. Isn’t it true that it is only the person who wears the shoe who can tell where the pinches? It is a well-established fact that experience is the best teacher. This is because we all feel pains differently. According to a philosopher, life is about experiences. We all have to dream, strive, and fail before we can achieve success. Maybe we’ll discover along the way that the journey is more important than the destination
In one of my articles, published a couple of years ago what is life and how can one live through it? I defined life as a woman because you cannot “really” know her. During the course of this article, we shall be discussing many components of life and how the experience can shape you. We all need experience to survive through life because it helps to shape us in addition to giving us more exposure, opportunity, and respect. For instance, we all sit in the same classroom, but we don’t hear and understand the same thing; we all look at a picture but we don’t see the same thing; we all might be walking to a location but we all have a different vision; we all have a business but we run it differently based on our experiences, knowledge and even networks. The same theory is applicable to marriage, job, academics, business, sports etc.
Let’s share some practical details on how experience can shape us.
Marriage/Relationship
This is one of the most complicated and sensitive part of life any human can relate to. Marriage in simple term is life itself. As fondly opined by many rational minds, it is the school one can never graduate from, because you’ll continue to learn until the end of life. In our contemporary society, we have recorded so many divorces and questions flood the mind as what the secret to a successful marriage relationship actually is. Well, in my own humble opinion, there’s no clear cut secret to marriage except the presence of true love between both parties. This is because lots of factors contribute to a make a successful marriage. Every marriage is different and only the partners themselves can decide how they can manage their affairs. Where there’s a misunderstanding between both partners, it will be in their best interest to settle it themselves, and where they can’t settle it, a married or informed counselor can assist. I’m not insinuating that unmarried counselors with insightful positive experience can’t advise married couples, but I do know that whenever couples have problems, they are the only ones who can address their concerns better because nobody knows the root and fundamental cause of the problem more than do especially when they are not comfortable letting it out which leaves the counselor with the only option of speaking from his/her own experience. There have been cases where unmarried couples give advice to married people, in as much I won’t kick against that idea, I feel that sometimes, if not most times, experience plays a huge role in solving problems especially a sensitive one like marriage. Moral: somethings are best experienced than imagined. This is because of the practicality that comes with it. It’s just like driving, having sex, running a business etc.
Business
Just like the saying, old wine tastes better, the same can be said for business. The more time you spend learning the ropes in addition to equipping yourself with knowledge can play a huge role in shaping your business. Just like every great work takes time to manifest, business takes time to grow. I doubt if there’s any overnight successful in business. If at all one ever exist, it’s an exceptional circumstance it’s quite unfortunate many people jump into a business with the mindset of having a great turn over/profit just because they see it is flourishing or they see their friends/colleagues making great strides in the industry. What they fail to understand is that it is not greener out there and every business has a secret.
It’s imperative to note that one of the greatest ways to succeed in business is by having a great network. People find it comfortable to relate with people they know. According to Robin Sharma, “the business of business is relationship, but the business of life human connection”. In business, a lot of factors come into consideration before one can have a headway. First and foremost you must know what you are passionate about and what your skills set is composed of. Then, give yourself the necessary time to learn the business/trade. This learning can take several forms such as reading, volunteering, taking a class, networking and gaining exposure in the sector.
Furthermore, to succeed in business, you must learn soft skills in addition to being creative with emotional intelligence. For example, a creative and proactive businessman/woman must meet people where are as opposed to having the clients meet him/her where he/she is. A prudent business-minded fellow must have a great attitude to listen to customers, he/she must take the initiative of providing ideas on what might be beneficial to the business, and he/she must have a great attitude to relate with not only his/her clients but the public at large. According to John Maxell, ‘Leaders must be close enough to relate to others, but far enough ahead to motivate them’.
Job
One of the places that experience plays an influential role is the aspect of a job. Most employers always look for candidates with experience during the hiring process. It’s only in a few and rare instance they accept a candidate without experience. An experienced candidate tends to do a better job than a new hire. For example, a new hire may do the job in the right way, but an experienced being may do it in an efficient way.
Academic
In our contemporary society, many people seem people to downplay the role of education as it relates to succeeding in life. They opine that you can always “learn from the street”, you can also learn in an informal way as opposed to formal education. However, they fail to realize that education itself is an experience because you need to get theoretical knowledge before applying practical knowledge. It should be noted that academic education gives you an edge over a person who doesn’t have any opportunity/exposure to one. It is a well-established fact that no knowledge is a waste and having a basic theoretical knowledge can take the place of experience in certain situations.
Sports
This is another great area where experience plays a role. Sports is one of the great areas where experience is needed. It doesn’t matter if you play football, soccer, table tennis, volleyball, basketball, track and felid events and wresting. Your experience will definitely make a difference if you harness it well.
In conclusion, regardless of what you may have experienced through life, having a positive attitude is a guaranteed way of overcoming negative experience. According to Reno Omokri, an author and Pastor, “the secret of love is sacrifice. The secret of happiness is giving; the secret of life is GOD.” This nugget may have informed his line of thought. I don’t know your experience, but whatever it is continue to learn from it because one day it will add up and when you look back, you’ll understand why you have to have to go through the whole experience.
Personal
Just like every taste bud is different, each and every one of us experience different things in life. According to Eleanor Roosevelt, “The purpose of life is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience.” If you ask anyone what’s the purpose of life, you’ll likely receive different responses. The answer to this question is subjective and deeply personal. Different things are important to us throughout the course of our lives. Yet one thing stays with us no matter where we go: our experiences. With respect to personal experience, definitely it’s important to note that your network determines your net worth. Therefore, cultivate your friendships and find companies that fulfill you. It’s from those experiences in life that you’ll learn and grow. In this process, we can learn valuable lessons about ourselves and the world around us. So, don’t be hard on yourself.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the author of the acclaimed book Design Your Destiny – Actualizing Your Birthright To Success. He can be reached via henrous@gmail.com
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Adding Value
Adding Value: Seek Wisdom and Knowledge by Henry Ukazu
Published
1 day agoon
November 16, 2024By
EricDear Destiny Friends,
There is no gainsaying the fact that everyone desirous of making impact in life must live a life of purpose. This is where knowledge and information come to play. It is these knowledge and information that will set an individual apart from his contemporaries.
I strongly believe, if one is not informed, they are ill-informed, and when they are ill-informed, they can’t perform well in any given endeavour. This is because information leads to reformation and transformation. We can therefore, confidently say that information leads to formation because everyone is a product of what they know.
Knowledge acquisition is one of the best things that can happen to anyone. People with knowledge are revered, and highly respected. Having knowledge is like having money. People from all walks of life will seek you.
There are different kinds of knowledge, and they include Revealed Knowledge, which comes from those who wrote the Bible and Intuitive Knowledge, which comes from the mind. It is the ability to gain knowledge without conscious reason or explanation.
Others are Empirical Knowledge, which is information gained through observation, experimentation, and direct experience, rather than through theoretical reason or intuition; Authoritative Knowledge, which is the knowledge a man has because of his expertise in a particular field; and finally but not the least, Rational Knowledge, which is a form of knowledge that uses reasoning and philosophy to understand the world.
From this illustration, a decisive mind can see that knowledge is priceless. Knowledge is like education. It can provide security and access. Even the Book of life says in Proverbs 4:13, “your education is your life, guard it very well”; and in Hosea 4:6 that “my people perish for lack of knowledge”.
From my personal experience in life, apart from death, one of the greatest levelers of all time is education. This is because the child of a certified pauper can become a man of means tomorrow if properly educated. That explains why children from humble backgrounds ought to take their education very seriously, especially if they don’t have affluence.
On a personal note, I come from a very humble background, my late parents didn’t have the opportunity of acquiring a decent education, but they knew the value of education and endeavored to give me and my siblings a decent education. In retrospect, when I look back and see some of my contemporaries whose parents couldn’t give them a decent education, I bless my late parents because education has exposed me to lots of opportunities in the United States, and the global world in addition to granting me an audience with the high and mighty in society.
Sometimes, when I look at my modest achievement, I’m deeply humbled because I know it is the grace of God. Who am I to author two amazing trailblazers’ books, get featured and profiled by the New York Times, engage in high level conversation with leaders of thought and captains of industries. Apart from the grace of God, intentional seeking of knowledge, and wise counsel from mentors and strategically positioning myself have been some of the cornerstone to my success.
Imagine if my late parents didn’t give me a decent education and opportunity of travelling to the United States, most of these opportunities and exposure wouldn’t have been readily available.
When one is decently enlightened, educated and informed about life, their level of reasoning and understanding differ from an ordinary man. If one desires to go far in life, one must seek knowledge.
It is your knowledge that sets you apart from others.
According to Dr. Yomi Garnett, an accomplished Ghostwriter, “If you are a man of great knowledge, people will have great respect for you. If you are a man of great wisdom, people will have great reverence for you. And if you are a man of both, great knowledge and great wisdom, you will be the most eminent of men. But in real terms, people don’t care how much you know, or how much wisdom you have, unless they know how much you care.”
The moral of this quote is that despite the knowledge and information at one’s disposal, if one lacks empathy, their knowledge, experience and whatever they have mean nothing.
The importance of knowledge cannot be overemphasized. In our contemporary society, a fast way of attracting opportunities is by showcasing the knowledge at one’s disposal. It is so sad that many people don’t take time to read, research and learn new trends applicable in their industry, and in the world generally and as such, they find it difficult to fit in and grow.
It is instructive to note that when you seek knowledge, opportunities will seek for you. A major reason people are poor is simply because they are not solving problems and to solve problems, one ought to have understanding. Do you know that if you don’t have money, the reason is often because you are not solving a problem, or you are not solving enough problems, or you are not solving the right problem or you are not solving problems for the right people. Generally, we make money because we have something unique to offer to the world. Therefore, to solve problems, one must have knowledge and information.
We currently live in an age of technological, where skills, talent and creativity are in high demand. Any progressive being that desires to go far must be intentional in seeking knowledge. Successful acquisition of knowledge, information and understanding can lead to discernment and wisdom.
In conclusion, as you journey towards life, if you want to make an impact, seek opportunities, and earn more money, do yourself a favour by endeavoring to seek knowledge, wisdom, and information. You can’t get these by sitting on your sofa or staying in your comfort zone.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your and Unleash Your Destiny. He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
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Adding Value
Adding Value: Dealing with Failure by Henry Ukazu
Published
1 week agoon
November 9, 2024By
EricDear Destiny Friend,
Failure is one the dreaded, if not the most dreaded fears of the average human being. It competes favourably with poverty. Just like wealth and success boost the confidence of a person, so does failure humbles a man’s psyche. However, the ability to manage success as a skill, needs to be understudied to avoid failure.
In recent times, I have learnt to ask resourceful people more about their failures more than their success. As a matter of fact, people who have failed more have more to share than people who have succeeded. The irony of life is that most of the time, people tend to give more credence to those who have succeeded more than those who have failed.
Uninformed people see those who have failed as people with dirt or dent on their lives. In some cases, they are seen as nothing to write home about just because they failed. It’s instructive to note that failure is not alien to anyone. Everyone, at one time or another, experiences failure. What some people fail to understand however, is that the people who failed have a lot more to share than those who succeeded.
Just to put it in perspective, imagine a divorcee giving you a genuine advice on marriage; imagine a politician who has failed in several elections and later succeed giving you an advice on electioneering campaigns; imagine a businessman who failed in business up advising you on how to run a business; imagine a student who has failed a class advising you how to do well in a class. The list is literally endless. One thing is certain, all these failures will come from the place of love, pain and fulfilment and will be properly metaphor into gain if properly utilized.
I have failed many times more than I have succeeded and this failure has humbled me. If only our failures and mistakes are written on our face, no human will have a clean face. It’s so sad many people have allowed their mistakes and failures to define them.
To understand how to deal with failure, let’s explain the concept of failure with the word FAILURE.
Fall
Literally, when you fall, it means you have failed or fallen from an exalted position. Before one fails in life, one would have fallen. In contemporary times, uninformed people in our society tend to laugh at people who have failed elections, failed exams, failed in academics, failed in leadership positions, failed in marriage and failed in their personal and professional vocations. When you fail in life, the next thing is to acknowledge it and try to maximize the opportunity to bounce back.
Acknowledgement.
It’s only a fool who will do the same thing over and over again and expect to get a different result. When you make a mistake, the best thing to do as a leader is to acknowledge it and learn to avoid the mistake again. Failing to acknowledge your mistake will make people perceive you as having pride especially when one tries to apportion the blame to another person. When you acknowledge your mistake, the next stage is to investigate the mistake to avoid repeating it again.
Investigate.
This is the beginning of learning. When people investigate, they are trying to know more to verify certain information or acts. Without investigation, there will be little or no consequences. When it comes to failures, investigating a mistake doesn’t mean one is trying to find a fault, rather one is trying to know how to avert a similar problem. When one has truly found the answers to a problem, one will begin to learn from the experience what truly happened.
Learn
Nothing elevates one than learning from one’s mistakes. When you learn from your mistakes, you will be poised to unleash your potential by turning your mistakes into your friend. It’s quite unfortunate that many people don’t take time to learn. Learning will strategically position one to avoid mistakes. It’s said, a wise man learns from his mistakes, but a wiser man learns from other people’s mistakes. When one learns, one will understand how systems and structures work. When you learn more, you stand a better position to earn more especially when one has learned from their mistakes.
Understand
Failure in life comes with understanding. When one fails, one will see and understand life differently. Just to put this in perspective. Imagine a man who has fortune and has been a tremendous blessing to people and now lives in penury. Many of his beneficiaries will gradually slide to the next benefactor. Again, imagine a politician with influence as a Governor, Minister of President controlling and managing people and resources, one can’t imagine the beehive of people that will be trooping to his house and office daily seeking for favor. The day the man loses his position, he will understand the meaning of loyalty because the majority of people who were around him were simply there due to vested interests. If you call them sycophants, you won’t be totally wrong. This is simply the reality of life. Moral: Failure in life will give you understanding and wisdom.
When you experience this understanding, the best thing that can happen to you will be to realign with the right people with the right energy. Going back to the people who abandoned you literally means; one hasn’t learnt much and is about to make another terrible mistake.
Realign
Realignment comes with attraction. Just like kind attracts people with similar vision, purpose and energy attracts. Failure in life will make one practice alignment by taking stock of what’s working in and what’s not working. When one experiences failure, going to the same people, and situations that led one to the same mistake simply means the person hasn’t aligned well. When proper alignment has taken place, the next big stage is to evolve. This is where all the pieces will be put together to make failure have a meaning.
Evolve
When one evolves, it means one has metamorphosed into a new being. To evolve means one has grown and no longer operates from the place of lack. During my formative years in the USA, I used to be a horrible writer, but when you juxtapose the Henry Ukazu of 2010 and the Henry Ukazu of 2024, you will know the difference is clear. When you evolve, you will see a lot of transformation in your life.
Failure makes one evolve into a new beginning. To understand how one evolves, a newborn baby crawls before walking and running. In a similar vein, a child attends kindergarten school before attending elementary, middle school, high school, and college. All these are processes of evolution. Failure makes one evolve and transform into a better person. Failure has many parts and components and when they have been assembled, they will make one to evolve to a more refined and reformed being.
In summary, as you journey through life, see failure as an experience as opposed to a mistake. In that way, you will learn from it.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny and Unleash Your Destiny . He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
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Adding Value
Adding Value: Be a Person of Purpose by Henry Ukazu
Published
2 weeks agoon
November 2, 2024By
EricGreetings Destiny Friends,
It is generally believed that the two most important dates in a person’s life are the day of his birth and the day of his purpose-discovery. Every human being is born with a purpose and a gift. One of the best things that can happen to anyone is to know his purpose, and work assiduously to fulfill it. It is important to note that the day one discovers his purpose is the day he becomes a millionaire.
The journey of purpose can be demanding and tasking, but if one is dedicated to fulfilling the purpose, he must be ready to face and overcome the associated challenges.
When one is blessed with a bright future, distractions are bound to come up so that the purpose will not be fulfilled. This is because when you succeed in your purpose, many people will benefit, and when you fail many people who are supposed to benefit, will suffer loss. That’s why it’s always good for someone to achieve success, no matter how little.
One of the best ways to succeed in life is by working with one’s gift or talent. One will easily attract opportunities, favour, blessings, and tractions when gift is involved in the endeavour. Even enemies will be forced to seek your services when you are the best person to do the job.
It’s worthy of note that when one is working on purpose, he will easily be misunderstood, and that’s okay, but when one succeeds, the ovation will change. The transformation and blessings that come with purpose is priceless. This is because one will be revered and highly sought after.
A man of purpose is focused like an eagle. He sees life’s bigger picture. And in spite of failure in business, academics, relationship/marriage, personal and professional challenges, a person of purpose will still strive because he knows his desire for success outweighs his fear of failure.
It is easy for one to give up in life when one experiences setbacks after investing time and resources into a project. Imagine spending years to invest enormous amounts of money and time on a project and it still fails. That can be disastrous. There are many things that can make one lose focus in life. Also, imagine investing months and years studying for a degree only for one to fail because of one or two marks; it could be traumatic. Imagine investing ten, twenty and thirty years in a marriage and it fails, it could be heartbreaking. Imagine spending a lot to build a mansion only for it to be destroyed in minutes due to faulty foundation or act of nature. The story is endless.
To be a person of purpose, one must be determined to overcome the vicissitudes of life. Imagine knowing your purpose and gift, but lack the capacity, structure, and resources to diligently pursue it. It will take an extraordinary man with an extraordinary mindset to stay focused especially when faced with financial challenges.
Couple of years ago, a friend reached out to me for a job opportunity which pays almost three times of my salary. I was tempted to take the offer, but I had two concerns, first, I was being considered for a job by the Mayor of New York. Secondly, the job I was being touted for is a totally different industry. After giving it a serious consideration, I had to decline the job offer. Even though it appeared unpopular to a lot of people, I considered it a good decision because life is not about money but making an impact in the lives of people. Yes, the money is good, but I thought it would be great to stay focused on one’s purpose because at the end, it will ultimately attract opportunities which money can’t buy.
To be a man of purpose, there are two great and indispensable traits a man must possess, they are vision and focus. While the vision will keep the dream alive, focus will be the vehicle to actualize it. Every human being should pray for the grace to know their purpose and understand the associated vision that comes with that calling and then abide in that calling by being focused.
There are many men of purpose who have overcome the challenges of life to achieve great feats. One of the most revered men of history is the former late President of South Africa, President Nelson Mandela, who opposed South Africa’s apartheid system. He faced harsh conditions to deter his resolve to give all South Africans equality. He spent twenty-seven years in prison. Upon his release, he contested for the presidency and won. Now, that’s a man of purpose.
Another interesting story is Abraham Lincoln who lost his job in 1832; got defeated for State legislature in 1832. Failed in business in 1833. Failed in business. Elected to State legislature in 1834. His sweetheart died in 1835. He had a nervous breakdown in 1836. He was defeated for speaker in 1838. He was defeated for nomination for Congress in 1843. He was elected to Congress in 1846. Lost renomination in 1848. He was rejected for land officer in 1849. He was defeated for U.S Senate in 1854. He was defeated for nomination for Vice President in 1856. He was defeated for U.S Senate in 1858 and got elected as the 16th President of the United States of America.
What’s the moral here? It’s not easy to face all these challenges and still remain focused on the big picture. President Lincoln can be described as a man of purpose. If we are honest to ourselves, very few people can survive these setbacks.
In conclusion, I don’t know what your storyline is, but one thing I can guarantee you is that good things don’t come easily. One will be groomed like gold goes through fire to become gold. Also, oil will have to be refined before it can be transformed into a fine finished product. As you journey through life, resolve to be internally focused and mentally determined to be a person of purpose.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your and Unleash Your Destiny . He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
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