Dear Destiny Friends,

One of the best things that can happen to any person is getting connected. Not only that, but having the best of connections. Connections come in various ways. There is always a distinct difference in the way you connect with yourself, children, parents, friends, colleagues, mentors, strangers, teachers, and boss. One must know what works with these people to connect with them, otherwise it might be difficult to get your desire, especially when it relates to opportunities.

You cannot underscore the importance of human or personal relationships. Despite getting formal education, good grades, and being the best in what you do, you must make an intentional effort to put yourself out there, and this entails relating with people both formally and informally.

The importance of human connection cannot be overemphasized; it’s just like a man who wants to get close to a lady. You must understand the love language, which can be words affirmation, gifts, acts of services or physical touch. All these entail connecting with the other person in the way they understand. When you use words instead of gifts, the lady might not respond positively; when you use gifts instead of time, you might miss the person, same way if you use words, gifts, physical touch but don’t show little act of service, she might see you as an unattractive being. This is why connection is very important.

Apart from being educated and doing what you need to do to succeed, did you know you need connection to succeed? Yes, you need connection to succeed because you might be the best singer, but if you don’t get an opportunity to sing, nobody might hear your voice. You might be the best writer, but if nobody gives you an opportunity to write, your work might not see the light of the day. We all need an opportunity to showcase our work to get publicity. The big question we need to ask ourselves is how do we connect to people?

Connection works in different ways. Everyone needs to have a connection. Your connection can be God, who you relate with spiritually; it can also be a mentor or benefactor who has the platform or access to the publicity you need. Most people even connect to a “god” who assists them with false wealth or opportunity. Your connection can be from the school you attended, social engagement/networking group you belong to or even strangers you meet on the streets. If you can engage them in fruitful conversation, you are setting up yourself for success

Connection can also be through a referral, recommendation, through marketing efforts, or an established platform. It could also be via your online presence where you share your work (article or videos)

To have the success you want, you need a connection with yourself, others, and your work. For connection to be effective, you must understand how your public, private and secret life works. Your public life is the way you relate with people while in public space, your private life relates with the way you relate with your family and close friends, while your secret life relates with the way you relate with yourself. Only you know this part of you, that’s why self discovery is very important. Let me explain how this works.

CONNECTION WITH YOURSELF

Self Leadership is a skill that needs to be developed if you are to maximize the potential you were given. You cannot connect with yourself if you don’t understand yourself. It is important to state that self-connection is the most fundamental and crucial of all connections because it will allow you to bring out the best in you, which means you’ll be able to tap into a purpose that lights up your life. It may come in the form of inner guidance, intuition etc. This connection is personal and can only be understood by you.

CONNECTION WITH OTHERS

As generally stated, success comes with a team. You need people to succeed in life. Without people in your life, your life might be hollow, especially when you need to get work done and can’t do it alone. While most problems you encounter stem from a connection to people, you wouldn’t want to live without them. It is instructive to note that connecting with the right people is hard and getting them to do things for you is even harder.

CONNECTION WITH YOUR WORK

You can connect with other people with your work. The desire to produce, contribute or create is in each and everyone of us. We all want the opportunity to engage in work that gives us great pleasure while being valued and handsomely rewarded. It is when you do your work perfectly well that your value will be noticed and appreciated.

A critical area of connecting with people is networking. Networking is about establishing, building, and nurturing long-term, mutually beneficial relationships with the people you meet. Like I always say, we live in a connected and social economy with the invention of the internet and social media where the world is now a global village.

Do you know that networking has gone global? Yes, who you know might open the door for you, but who knows you will give you the seat. This is because you might know former President Obama, but the big question is, does Obama know you? You might know Henry Ukazu due to his global works on youths and Human Capacity Development, but does Henry Ukazu know you?

Experts agree that the most connected people are often the most successful. When you invest in your relationships -professional and personal – it can pay you back dividends throughout the course of your career because networking is a currency.

Networking is essential since it will help you develop and improve your skill set, stay on top of the latest trends in your industry, prospective mentors, partners, and clients, and gain access to the necessary resources that will foster your career development.

In conclusion, take time out today to think about the connections you have in your life and ask yourself, am I plugged into the right connection that will connect me to the success I desire? That should be your food for thought.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s a Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate and creative writer. He’s the author of the acclaimed book Design Your Destiny – Actualizing Your Birthright to Success. He can be reached info@gloemi.com

Dear Destiny Friends,

Everything in life has rules and processes. There is every tendency that one may hit the rocks if for any reason he fails to adhere to the set rules and processes. It is only on rare occasions that the luck or “grace factor” can come to one’s rescue. In legal matters, one must understand the laws, rules and exceptions to win a case. In mathematics, one must know the formula while in medicine, diagnosis is a prerequisite to ascertain the cause of any illness.

The focus of this article is on the necessity of soft skills in achieving success. Note that rules bordering on success are not exhaustive; they are more like basic and insightful ideas one can explore if one is determined to succeed.

Just like there are many ways to kill a rat, there are also many ways to succeed. However, one thing is certain, one must follow and adopt relevant principles. Principles are universal, and once rightly applied, one is bound to reap the benefits. I will be sharing some of the principles a diligent, progressive and success-prone mind can adopt.

While reading, working hard and smart on your business are important, it is imperative to note that learning a skill, developing your talent and gifts are equally important success magnets a rational mind must adopt. Some of these success principles which I call success magnets are built into soft skills among which are building capacity, having a good reputation, being diligent, consistency, networking, personal relationship, good attitude, good communication, problem solving skills, creativity and empathy.

You may be wondering how one applies these soft skills? Let’s start from the area of building capacity. In any area you would like to get prominence, you must endeavor to learn as much as possible to gain credibility. When you have developed capacity, it will be easy to apply soft skills.  It is sad to note that sometimes, some people put the cart before the horse, and think the universe will favour them. No, you must understand the process. No serious mind will give you an opportunity when you are yet to develop capacity. When you develop capacity, it will be easy to apply the soft skills.

Even if you haven’t developed capacity, you can creatively use soft skills to learn how to develop capacity if you have a good communication skill, great mindset and attitude.

These soft skills might sound ordinary, but trust me, they are very fundamental. This is because, even with theoretical and practical knowledge, if you don’t have these soft skills, you might appear unattractive. But if you have these soft skills, you can learn both theoretical and practical knowledge.

It is easy to say ‘I want to succeed’, but when we are exposed to the diligent and consistent work we must do, we’ll rather remain in our comfort zone. Trust me, I have been there, but I refuse to stay there because I have since understood that there’s no gain in playing little when you can play big.

On a personal note, I normally do all within my reach to give my best shot by preparing for the best and expecting the worst to the extent it goes south. As you may know, nothing is guaranteed in life, no matter how hard you work, or how much trust you may have in your work. You can do all you are expected to do and still fail. Yes, you can have theoretical, practical and social skills and still fail. In such a situation, just know that your time has not come yet.

It’s important to note that there’s no substitute for excellence.  It’s either the work is good or not. To achieve excellence, endeavor to spend one percent of your time in an area of your life you have a strong interest in or whatever you are passionate about. By doing, you will develop expertise.

Another great rule for success is surrounding yourself with greatness. By this, I mean people who are exceptionally good in what they do. They might not be in your areas of interest, but if they are, that’s a plus. These people might be younger or older than you, they must have certain traits or values you admire, but more importantly, they should bring out the best in you.

Most times, in our quest to make an impact in life, we tend to focus on hard work which is good, but experience and life has taught me to focus on what ignites your spirit and soft silks can be the game-changer. When you channel your energy on where you are celebrated, you will understand the importance of value. Imagine working with someone who doesn’t understand the value you bring to the table, all your work will be considered as mere service, but someone with a heart of service, gratitude and appreciation knows the importance of value when they see one. This is the simple reason why most employers and resourceful beings make conscious efforts to retain certain people despite the noise outside.

When you are successful, there’s this level of happiness and fulfillment that comes to you. This success comes to you because you have done something unique like having mentors or role models. Let’s take a minute to discuss mentors and role models, and their importance.

If you will agree with me, success leaves clues where it derived its strength and foundation. There’s nothing in life that doesn’t have a foundation. As you journey through life, find mentors and role models who have already achieved what you would like to achieve. Just like you study what the happiest couples have done to stay together for decades if want true love; you can also learn from the experience of those whose marriage didn’t work, they might give you one or two advice that might be more beneficial to you than couples whose marriage never broke up.

If your dream is to be the best lawyer in your city or State, study what the best lawyers in your city or country did to achieve their reputations. If you want to be a World Champion, study the lives of World Champions, and learn how they did it. If you want to be a millionaire, find millionaire role models who you would like to be someday. If you want to be an entrepreneur, find a few entrepreneurs who inspire you and study how they achieved what they have. Without a doubt, mentors and role models are your shortcuts to unleashing your greatness. By learning from the experiences of others, you will increase your possibility of succeeding, and avoid unnecessary mistakes.

Give and Give: This principle is mind-blowing. As humans, we are naturally selfish, we do care for ourselves most times more than others do. Don’t get me wrong, you need to care for yourself first. However, for the purpose of this principle, I want you to know that you will get what you want faster when you help other people to achieve what they want. Life is not about you, neither is it centered on you . The average man seeks what he can receive from the world. The extraordinary man seeks what he can give to the world. When you assist other people without having an expectation, they will be glad to go the extra mile for you if they have an appreciative mindset. And of course, a lot of people do!

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s a Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate and creative writer. He’s the author of the acclaimed book Design Your Destiny – Actualizing Your Birthright to Success. He can be reached info@gloemi.com

Dear Destiny Friends,

“Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.” – Albert Schweitzer

Nothing makes the heart merrier than success. Success comes in different shapes and sizes. However, our contemporary society is now positing money or wealth as success.  But it is imperative to note that what most people see as success is actually money or wealth on display. When you don’t have money to show the world, most people don’t see you as successful. But what they fail to understand is that success is relative. You can be successful in any sphere of life including business, academics, politics, spirituality, family, career, entertainment or art.

If you ask me, the first foundational principle of success is knowing yourself. Knowing who you are is a key ingredient for success. As mentioned earlier, all those who have been able to succeed either in business, academic, spirituality, entertainment, art, politics, and family identified themselves. They didn’t copy anyone. They know what they carry is unique and the only way they can make an impact in the world in an efficient manner is to be the best version of themselves.

This is the reason my organisation, Global Empowerment and Mentoring Initiative Inc, (Gloemi.com) focuses on Human Capacity Development. We help youths and career professionals to unleash their potential. We do this by using our self-discovery programme to inquire into the latent gifts and talents which are lying fallow in our clients. We take the client throigh the rudiments of discovering their inept qualities because it is not what we don’t know that makes us fail, but we are not aware that is inside of us.

In Gloemi, we know that everyone is destined to succeed. But this success comes at a price which an individual must be willing to pay. A key component of our training is focused on Mindset transformation. We do this because we success and failure start from the mind, and the fact that many youths lack the right information to succeed. Some youths are mostly influenced by what they see on the internet and social media. For instance, some believe that education is a scam having not come to terms with why one would invest so much money in acquiring a formal education and then find it difficult to get a job commensurate to the money and time invested in formal education. They fail to understand that education itself is a training and opportunity to broaden one’s mind and expose them to the world through enlightenment.

Again, some believe that money is the prize tag when they have come of age. And so, when they are done with High School or College, the next thing is to look for money, they fail to realize that life is very dynamic. You need mentors who can guide you on the right path of life, depending on your interest. That’s why it is important to instill in the minds of youths the relativity of success. You can get all the money in the world and still be poor because there’s more to life than money. These are some of the information and training we offer at Gloemi.

When I say success is inside of you, trust me, it’s real. Success is inside everyone of us. I want you to join me in a little exercise now and say to yourself, success is inside of me. Yes, say it loud to yourself. You may be wondering, where is the success? The answer simply lies in asking yourself, what’s the one thing I can do for free without anyone paying me? Again, you can ask yourself, what’s the one thing I love to do that makes me happy? By the time you answer these question(s), you have solved 50% of your life challenges.

The challenge most people have is that sometimes, they wait for other people to believe in them or give them an opportunity before they can hit the ground running. The world doesn’t need to give you permission, you have what it takes to make the world to go round. If you wait for the world to give you permission, you might be heading for a disaster because the world is filled with jealousy. According to Ray Goforth,  “There are two types of people who will tell you that you cannot make a difference in this world: those who are afraid to try and those who are afraid you will succeed.”

If you care to know to know how success is deposited inside of you, consider the likes of Aliko Dangote, Bill gate, Ben Carson, Barack Obama, Peter Obi, Donald Trump, Cristiano Ronaldo, Albert Einstein, Dr. Yomi Garnett, Steve Jobs, Mother Theresa, Mike Tyson, and Henry Ukazu, just to mention a few. All these great world leaders have distinguished themselves in their respective fields. They are known for one thing or another. For instance, Dangote is regarded as the richest Black man in the world, but he can’t cure himself if he is sick, he will have to consult a medical doctor like Ben Carson to operate on him depending on the medical treatment he needs. In the same vein, Bill Gates is so wealthy that he can fund any business he has interest in, but if he wants to write a book about himself, he will have to engage Dr. Yomi Garnett who is one of the best if not the best Ghost writers the world has produced to write his book.

The same principle is applicable if Cristiano Ronaldo, Barack Obama and Bill Gates want to inspire the youths, there’s no other person best suited to train and empower the youths than Henry Ukazu, who has written a trailblazer book on youths’ empowerment and has been globally celebrated and profiled by world leaders, New York Times, United Nations, News12 just to mention a few. The point I am trying to make here is that one has to know himself and what’s unique about him for the world to take him serious. That on its own is success.

In the journey of life, it is important to note that you will have to believe in yourself before others can believe in you. You will have to begin the race or journey before others can join you. According to Chuck Norris “Always remember that your success is inside you, if you can’t see it first, no one can see it”. When you become a man of success, you’ll attract value to yourself. It’s your value that will bring the success that’s inside of you.

According to Albert Einstein, “Try not to become a man of success. Rather become a man of value.”

In conclusion, take a moment self-examination, and then ask yourself, what’s unique about me, what are my gifts, talents and what skills do I have that makes me unique to help other people? When you correctly answer the questions, you are gradually heading to success if only you can develop and multiply it to help other people solve their problems.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s a Human Capacity and mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate and creative writer. He’s the author of the acclaimed book Design Your Destiny – Actualizing Your Birthright to Success. He can be reached info@gloemi.com