TEDx Ikoyi: Say Yes Now! Why Readiness is a Myth by Bella Disu

I was 38 when I finally met my whole self. Bella Disu — the change maker, the creative, the lifelong learner, the woman unafraid to keep evolving.

It’s interesting though, I didn’t meet her in a moment of perfect readiness. I met her after I got tired of constantly walking within the same walls. Today, I’d like to share the story of how I stopped waiting, what it taught me about why we hesitate, and what happens when we finally say yes.

A while ago, I decided to try something new. Not in business, but in my years-long fitness journey. At one point, I weighed 110 kilos. At another, 64. By my mid-30s, I had found a rhythm: 160 grams of protein a day, strength training four times a week, 10,000 steps daily. Slight work, right? I had three walking pads — one in my bedroom, one in my study, one in the office. Don’t ask. I’ve never been one for small measures.

But it worked. Of course it did. Until one day, I realized this is my life — walking in place and staring at the same walls. So, I thought maybe it’s time to move differently. Maybe I should learn tennis.

Yet, as soon as the thought came into my mind, I hesitated. I asked myself, “Should I do it? Should I wait? Wasn’t it too technical, too hard, too late?” After all, who starts tennis at 38?

Despite not feeling quite ready, I found a coach, showed up on the court, and soon I was playing tennis three, sometimes four times a week. And then, to my horror, I discovered that tennis doesn’t even give you that many steps. All those side-to-side moves don’t count. But by then, it wasn’t about steps anymore. I was hooked. And now I am often amazed at the physical and mental growth that has since happened all because of one small decision. I’d asked myself, “Should I do it? Should I wait?” And something in me answered, “Say yes now.”
But I’ve thought about why I hesitated in the first place. And it’s that for years I thought I had to wait for the right moment, for more qualifications, for a different version of myself. Psychologists call it destination addiction — the belief that happiness lives at the next milestone. So, a certain weight, title, or degree.

And I know I’m not alone. How many of you have asked yourselves: “Should I do it? Should I wait? What if I fail?” We all know that familiar voice that whispers, “Not yet.” So, if the antidote is that simple — say yes now — why don’t we all do it?

We don’t because hesitation is a conundrum. It wears the mask of readiness. And I used to mistake readiness for a finish line. Then in 2014, I met a coach I had invited to facilitate an HR session. And after the session, he said, “So tell me about Bella.”

I froze. I really did. I could talk about my work, my father’s mentorship, even my wedding — which is probably my biggest claim to fame at the time. But about me, I… I really didn’t have much to say. So, I was thankful when he offered me a complimentary session and said, “Let’s talk to Bella from 10 years ago. What would you tell her? And 10 years ahead — who is she?”

To be honest, that future Bella was hazy. But his questions drew out interests and passions I once buried. So he then said, “What’s stopping you from going after them? You can be many things at once.”

So I said a mental yes to his words — and it opened doors to pursuing diverse interests: a first master’s, later an MBA, writing and publishing my first children’s book, impacting lives through the Bella Disu Foundation, and gaining the courage to walk into rooms that once intimidated me.
You see, each step reinforced something critical: readiness is not a destination — it’s a posture. And we become ready by doing.

Today, I’m no longer a woman hesitating in life or business. And that transformation has seeped into organizations I lead. I’ve led through discomfort many times. I’ve restructured a board and redesigned corporate strategies. And I’ve dealt with the late nights, the doubts, and that familiar restlessness that keeps leaders awake thinking, “We have to make this change.”
Yet conviction, grounded in facts, gives me a sense of urgency. And that to me is leadership — seeing what could be and moving towards it. Viewing urgency as a journey toward clarity and not chaos.

And this is particularly important because organizations wrestle with hesitation just like individuals do. Some companies choose to wait for perfect timing — and lose their moment. Others say yes now — and change industries.

I’m sure you all are familiar with these three companies that sat at the same intersection in the 1990s. Remember Kodak?
Kodak saw digital images coming and froze. Blockbuster saw Netflix and laughed. Why? Organizational loss aversion. The fear of letting go of a successful past to pursue an uncertain future.

In contrast, Apple saw the same digital future and accelerated it. The difference? Two companies chose to protect their past and failed. One chose to create its future and thrived.

And that story isn’t foreign. It’s happened right here at home, too. Just think of how we went from seeing the glory days of a popular quick-service restaurant that defined our childhoods to the success and triumph of newer ones like Chicken Republic and Kilimanjaro.

We’ve also seen the rise and agility of fintechs pushing banks to challenge their long-held ways of doing business — and in doing so, unlocking entirely new markets and customer segments.

The companies that say yes now prove that courage and speed matter more than size and comfort. Therefore, the companies that thrive, the leaders who excel, the people who grow — they all share one thing: they’ve come to recognize the mask of hesitation and take it off.

When hesitation says “not yet,” they know that doing creates readiness. And when comfort offers its gentle cage, they choose the discomfort that leads to growth.

Indeed, when I look back at every important shift in my life, it began with a small yes — often inconvenient, sometimes uncomfortable, occasionally irrational.

Saying yes to tennis at 38. Saying yes to learning again. Saying yes to growth when it would have been easier to just stay still.
But here’s what I didn’t expect: saying yes never ends with you. My teams learn to challenge comfort because I did. The women I mentor raise their hands because they saw me raise mine. And my daughter Paris picked up a racket because I picked up courage.

Every yes we give ourselves becomes a light that tells someone else it is safe to begin.

So, right now in this room, someone is sitting on an idea — starting a new business, changing roles, writing that first page, booking that class. Maybe you’re waiting for perfect timing, asking yourself, “Should I do it? Should I wait?”